john 的 作文本

雲靉玥UID：2888572

话说改完了~



本人水平有限，挑不出什么错…感觉写的很好，有些东西都是我没想到的呢，拓宽了一下思路！


但感觉段与段之间的衔接几乎没有，有点让人摸不着头绪，大概就是这样了恩！加油咯~




2010-08-28


Life is not merely about working, it also contains other aspects. I agree with the statement that a job with more vacation but a low salary is better.

While working is important, because all of our food and facilities come from work, yet it does not mean that we should always be engaged in routine jobs. There are so many interesting and meaningful things other than work. For example, tourism, exploration to the mountains, caves, diving,(建议删掉，不然读不懂）and helping those who need care.



Tourism could broad our horizons. Through touring(加个逗号或者挪到句子末尾) we know what kind of life others are living and what other parts of the world look like. With a fine understanding of other places and people, tourism could help build a comprehensive understanding and mitigate narrow horizons. After months of work with anxiety, a tour to another beautiful and quiet place could also ease tension. Thereby help mold a salubrious life style.

At first sight, explorations might be formidable to some people. In daily lives, however,（个人比较喜欢这么写） everybody is running into a variety of explorations. When a child is learning to ride a bike, a high school student is learning to drive a car, an adult is contacting with a potential customer, they are exploring new field of lives. Other trials such as riding a bike to a remote city might be more exciting ones. Though peaceful livings are sweet, a life needs some piquancy if it were to be tastier. By leading us into the unknown lands overcoming all kind of difficulties, explorations make us bolder, more confident as well as stronger.（这段完全没有提到工作和假期，算不算有点跑题？）


Other kinds of extra time could be spending on help those who need our assistance. For instance, single old people who often feel lonely（举的是需要帮助的人的例子）. They want to talk to their children who might be in another country. By talking with the old people or taking care of them for a few hours, the young could be more experienced from the talks and the old feel warmer with other people’s care.

From what has been argued above, we need more free time to make lives more colorful and meaningful. Thereby I’d(不可以缩写) prefer a job with less pay but enough vacations.