1# crystal5841
Obviously, innumerable advertisements, which are broadcasting on every corner of the world, such as on daily newspapers, vogue magazines, and street billboards, exert considerable influence on people's life and under some circumstances, mislead the eating habit. 老实说,长句写的很厉害,我看着都有点累了However, it is not completely true to say that .
It is undeniable that advertising indeed induce people to eat unhealthy food and have erratic meals. Captivated by the inviting images of fast food, which is contains high calories and low vitamins, the adolescents, especially those who are still scanty of the ability to differentiate right from wrong, haunt the KFC, or Mcdonale(McDonale's) everyday and eventually suffer from obesity and malnutrition. Moreover, recently, the KFC advances the slogan(有点怪,去掉slogan,其实麦当劳早就24小时了的,KFC还慢了) of 24 hours opening, which provides an expedient excuse(两个词的搭配。。) for those who do not want to have supper on time, because they can order food on midnight. While according to a latest research paper on the Science, having food on(at) midnight will increase the risk of gastric cancer, because the stomach cannot get enough time to rest.
Advertising may, nevertheless, help foster more healthy eating habit than before. Many parents, who are concerned about their children's dislike of meals, learn a lot from the advertisement about essential nutrients, such as iron, and then remember to prepare certain dishes that are copious of iron. I am also benefit a lot from advertisement. The pills, which are propagated to be instrumental to sleep, release me from the nightmare, which is originated from my intense pressure from the approaching TOEFL test. 其实 吃安眠药不是什么健康的生活方式。。。
In addition, there are also many other factors that lead to the unhealthy eating habit. People nowadays have very little time for anything, even for eating. People have to work overtime, on(at) the expense of meals latter(latter是后者的意思). Husband(单数或者复数,不能这样一个词啊), whose wife is working overtime, stuffs himself with a piece of bread and a bottle of beer, and then spares much time to watch the exciting World Cup and champion(这个是指比赛还是什么?) and acclaim his favorite football star. A child, whose parents are working overtime, will go to KFC for his supper.1 F+ _+ @, ]7 D
Judging from what has been discussed above, the saying that advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits, is evidently wrong.太概括,应重述前面几段的的观点 词汇是亮点,但语法是弱点。红色为错误,绿色为精彩,蓝色为建议 部分长句写的不错,有些短语也不错,但需要注意是否需要写那么长。 The pills, which are propagated to be instrumental to sleep, 可以把propagated to be 去掉,并且 propagated的用法似乎不太对 我了解lz过了GRE,而且能运用,但部分词汇并不深刻了解如何用,如expedient,有空多查字典吧,不要知道中文意思就套进去了 加油!! |