adrian小豆 发表于 2013-4-17 00:19
求改啊 robin 我录了一个 4.16的第一题 求指点
语音语调很好,两点理由也很充分
几点小问题需要改进
1,说 home phone时候 we can't move,这个解释不够严谨。你强调cellphone的灵活性时候直接说 anywhere anytime,这样让人觉得是个语法错误,你可以说 Compare with home phones/landlines, cellphone is much more convenient since we can take it and use it anywhere.
最后结尾的时候说 This powerful application, this 指代什么?你前面说了 twitter, play games, learn English, 但是this application 你说的应该是 Cellphone, 其实你可以说成 with so many apps we can use, cellphone definitely makes our life easier. 这样就完美的点题了。