[习作点评] 【NINE小组】第十三次作业-by Amber [复制链接]

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发表于 2011-9-13 22:04:36 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

先发A，明早发I。刚出院到家~请spin.q稍等

Argument 48

The article argues that Clearview should be the preferred town for retirees. To make the argument convincing, the author mentions Clearview’s natural beauty, consistent climate, falling housing cost, and low taxes compared to nearby towns. Also, the author cites the mayor’s promise to improve schools, streets, and public services. Another reason for the claim is that retirees will take an excellent health care because of Clearview’s number of physicians much greater than the national average. In a second consideration, this argument is poorly supported in several respects.

First of all, picturesque scenery and consistent climate are not always constructing an appropriate place for retirees. The alluring natural environment in Clearviesw might attract visitors as well as retirees. Weary of city noises, people prefer to a tranquil trip or vocation in country town like Clearview. As a result, there will be a large number of visitors flooding this town, leaving it no longer comfortable and peaceful place for retirees. Based on this point, retirees will certainly choose other towns for a retiring living, rather than Clearview. To strengthen the assertion, information about the number of visitors in C is the primarily needed evidence.

In addition, a falling housing cost surely does not mean a low enough price for retirees to afford. The reason for a significant fall in cost might be that a few people would like to live in Clearview due to its high housing cost. And it is likely that the cost remains too much for retirees even if it is lower than that in earlier time. Compared to the high cost, lower taxes will make little sense. Who will care the taxes if a person can pay for an expensive house? In short, without a survey showing the ability of a majority of retirees to afford the house in C, the author could persuade nobody.

Furthermore, the communal facilities in C cannot necessarily satisfy the need of the retirees. The mayor’s promise to ameliorate the condition of schools and streets will bring little improvement in life of retirees, for their children are likely to have been adults and not been living with them. What the old actually need is a safe community with facilities for fundamental living need such as exercise and entertainment. Therefore, the author cannot conclude that retirees will favor the life in C owing to the promise of the mayor unless sound facilities for the old are guaranteed by government.

The last but not the least, the number in physicians plays a little critical role on the quality of health care for retirees——for two reasons. First, a number higher than the national average provides no any evidence. It would be more convincing to compare the number in C with that for other competitive retirement towns. Second, even if the number in physicians excels other towns, the health care still cannot be ensured. Besides the number of physicians, a good health care depends on many factors such as the ability of the physicians, the equipment for treatment, and medical care insurance. The conclusion remains unpersuasive if this article cannot supply evidence to indicate assurance for other factors.

To conclude, the author should provide evidence to ensure a serene life without disturbing by visitors and an acceptable housing cost for most retirees. To attract more retirees, this article also needs to offer clear evidence that facilities and health care for the old will bring them a comfortable and healthy old age.