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[作文] 求改作文啊，不想作文死得很惨.. [复制链接]

adriennegao
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电梯直达

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发表于 2012-4-20 22:11:29 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由 adriennegao 于 2012-4-20 22:12 编辑

题目：Some people think distance learning has morebenefits than schools so schools will disappear from our lives. To what extentdo you agree or disagrees?

There is no doubt that distance learning hasbecome a popular learning method in the present age. However, it is tooassertive to define schools will disappear from our lives.

Distance learning offers knowledge through internet to each student, in other words, the education institutes do not haveto rent places to offer curriculum to individuals and students do not have topay as much as price as in schools for the classes as well. Undoubtedly, lotsmoney can be saved by taking distance learning courses instead of schooling.Furthermore, students can have distance learning at home rather than go toschools. Accordingly, people do not have to suffer the traffic congestion inthe way to schools. Time can be saved. Distance learning requires much lessertime than learning in classrooms. It is inspiring that people can have moreleisure time for arranging their other business.

Regardless of distance learning has manyadvantages, schools are still valuable for us. In terms of net working,students in schools have chance to figure out problems with their classmates.Only in schools can people learn what teamwork and team sprit is. Those areimportant, extremely, for them when they work in society. Moreover, if studentsdo not study in traditional classrooms where many people come from differentbackground acquire knowledge, they would not be fostered to have a real mentalrelationship with teachers. Because there are much more opportunities in schoolsfor students to talk with their teachers face to face.

So my point of view is that distance learningcannot replace traditional schooling. Most people should acquire knowledge inclassrooms while the students who are not fit in schooling can accept distancelearning.

distance, Learning, people, schools, 作文

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leivs88
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沙发

发表于 2012-4-21 18:31:02 |只看该作者

第一段有些模板的影子。。。。。。。。。。

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bqiana
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板凳

发表于 2012-4-21 20:27:24 |只看该作者

Reaching soul
As time pass
Hearing voice
On the magic cross
Creating interface
Through finger touch
Searching peace
In cyber space
Hunch is stylish
Above superficies
Life is synchronous
In between balance
It is for you …

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adriennegao
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地板

发表于 2012-4-21 20:54:58 |只看该作者

3# bqiana 想去6.5分还需要哪里进步么

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bqiana
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5楼

发表于 2012-4-22 20:39:34 |只看该作者

logic & sentence structure

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adriennegao
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6楼

发表于 2012-4-22 21:07:46 |只看该作者

5# bqiana 谢谢！之后要注意这两点了

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adriennegao
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7楼

发表于 2012-4-25 09:02:58 |只看该作者

版主再帮我看看这篇作文有否改进吧

There is no getting around the fact that traffic congestion and pollution problems, which have been presented to us for long, are increasingly severe. Increasing the price of petrol is a less efficient method that can hardly tackle the problems, thoroughly.

It is undeniable that the large amount of private cars is the main cause of traffic jams and car emissions. Probably, raising the price of petrol would decrease the number of using the private cars. But it is not the sustainable way. As higher petrol costs will raise the cost of all kinds of vehicle as well, including public transportation. What it is meant by this is that individuals have to pay more money on travelling, which contributes the larger economic pressures to the poor families. Furthermore, increasing the price of petrol is harmful for the agriculture. Because farmers cultivate crops by modern machines which run by petrol. If the price of fuel gets higher, farmers would have to spend more money on farming. And the price of farm produces would be raised as well.

In terms of traffic problems, carpooling is one of the most effective ways. This way is becoming more and more popular among the young people. People can share cars with others when they go out, so the numbers of cars on the roads can be reduced. In addition, there is a tendency that cleaner fuels are being developed in the vehicle. For instance, electric motorcycles are being used among many people. This kind of vehicle does not have car emissions which contaminates the air condition.

Nobody can shirk his or her responsibility for environment protection. What people should do is reducing the times of using private cars and harnessing cleaner energy power.

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[作文] 求改作文啊，不想作文死得很惨.. [复制链接]

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