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[i习作temp] issue52 第一篇，写了好久好久，求拍，看看结构等有没有问题 [复制链接]

zhouyue0223
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电梯直达

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发表于 2012-4-24 19:41:10 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Issue52

The best way to teach is to praise positive actions and ignore negative ones.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the recommendation and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstance in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position.

提纲：1.表扬有利于提高学生的学习积极性（调查论证）

2. 但一味的表扬而不加以批评的话，很容易造成学生不知道自己的缺点，使学生偏离正确的方向。（比喻论证—驾驶飞机）

3. 失败带给我们的不只是教训，也是为成功打下基础（事例论证—化学家吉布斯实验）

观点：我们必须将两者结合起来，批评的时候加以表扬，表扬的时候提出更高的要求。
字数： 483，未限时

As education playing a more significant role in the international competition, the competition of comprehensive national strength in fact is primarily the match of education strength. And the method of teaching has a so notable effect on the quality of education that we should choose the best way to exert its enormous force. The speaker hold the viewpoint that praising the positive actions and ignoring the negative ones is the best means. Admittedly, the compliments would contribute to the teaching, to some extent. However, as a whole effect in general, praise and critique are both indispensible in the process of teaching.
To begin with, compliment and encouragement is necessary and they put forward the maneuver to develop the ability of Autonomous Learning. According to a recent survey conducted by Chinese Academy of Science, children who grow up in an environment full of praise and encouragement have greater interest in learning than those who always be blamed but with little praise. And the children with greater interest get better scores in studies, 30 percent higher on average, and show greater capabilities of self-learning. All of these attributed to the enormous impetus of compliment.
However, merely praising the positive ones and paying no attention on the faults or failure always lead to ones neglecting his defects and going farther from the correct direction. Such as piloting a plane, there are different directions of air stream. Some would push the aircraft to the correct destination while others interfere the normal flight. The pilots must maintain the right direction by controlling the different influences of airflow on plane. Without considering the airflow disturbance, the plane would be easy to deviate the normal flight and suffer a crash. Likely, teachers should also point out the negative actions of students in order to help the students maintain an appropriate direction.
In fact, it is a significant approach of learning to draw lessons from the failure and faults. In contrast with positive actions,
temperate failure would remind the person’s weakness and urge him to improve the disadvantages. For instance, Josiah Willard Gibbs, a famous chemist, has attempted numerous methods of the oxidation reaction before he synthesized the desired product—a rare polymer. It is his failure experience of researching better oxidation styles that builds the solid foundation of his later success. Failures and faults don’t cause desperation only, they would bring you to success if you take full advantages of the lessons from them.
In summary, praise and blame could not be separated in the teaching process. Praise provides the motivation to learn and blame helps to melioration of the shortcomings in learning. Bring blame but also with encouragement ,which would not strikes the confidence for learning of those who are criticized. And when it comes to compliment , propose a higher anticipation
simultaneously. Only in criticism and praise can a person make progress and growth and teaching makes sense.

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咖啡盐
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沙发

发表于 2012-4-24 22:04:30 |只看该作者

首先格式就不过关。

文论只存在两种格式1、开头空四个字符。2、顶格且段与段间空一行

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lixiaoying15
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板凳

发表于 2012-4-24 22:50:17 |只看该作者

給你的論證內容提些意見。文章沒有完全符合題目要求，In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstance in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and explain how these examples shape your position. 你應當給出具體哪些情況適用和不適用這條建議，駕駛飛機的所謂比喻論證並不符合要求，首先算不上教育上的specific circumstance, 其次駕駛飛機和教育學生有哪些根本上的共同點有待探討。
第四段更加off the topic, 失敗帶給人的影響和題目中的praise positive actions and ignore negative ones 有何相關？除非你把教師point out negative actions 和 failure建立起邏輯關係，畢竟negative actions並不自動等於failure。因此你舉的化學家的例子也不切題，他許多次試驗失敗難道是他的negative action造成的嗎？這個未必吧。
文章的語言沒有很大問題，只有些不影響理解的語法錯誤，意思表達比較清晰。

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zhouyue0223
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地板

发表于 2012-4-25 19:23:02 |只看该作者

首先格式就不过关。

文论只存在两种格式1、开头空四个字符。2、顶格且段与段间空一行
咖啡盐发表于 2012-4-24 22:04

我错了，部分原因是因为word粘贴上去的时候变了格式，我以后会注意的，谢谢版主提醒

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zhouyue0223
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5楼

发表于 2012-4-25 19:27:17 |只看该作者

給你的論證內容提些意見。文章沒有完全符合題目要求，In developing and supporting your position, describe specific circumstance in which adopting the recommendation would or would not be advantageous and ...
lixiaoying15 发表于 2012-4-24 22:50

谢谢大侠指点，经您这么一说，感觉确实漏洞百出，我会在接下来一个月更加努力的

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