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[a习作temp] Argument179 【四人行小组】第4次作业小白 [复制链接]

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lsarahz
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发表于 2009-7-16 22:25:24 |只看该作者

本帖最后由 lsarahz 于 2009-7-16 22:27 编辑

TOPIC: ARGUMENT179 - The following is a memorandum written by the director of personnel to the president of the Cedar Corporation.
"It would be a mistake to rehire the Good-Taste Company to supply the food in our employee cafeteria next year. It is the second most expensive caterer in the city. In addition, its prices have risen in each of the last three years, and it refuses to provide meals for people on special diets. Just last month three employees complained to me that they no longer eat in the cafeteria because they find the experience 'unbearable.' Our company should instead hire Discount Foods. Discount is a family-owned local company and it offers a varied menu of fish and poultry. I recently tasted a sample lunch at one of the many companies that Discount serves and it was delicious-an indication that hiring Discount will lead to improved employee satisfaction."
WORDS: 446
TIME: 00:29:33
DATE: 2009/7/15 16:55:04

Pointing out the shortcomings of the Good-Taste Company(CTC) with some biased evidence that the price in CTC is high and still increasing and a unrepresentative complaint from 3 employees, the director expresses his dissatisfaction about CTC. Adding an incomplete comparison between CTC and the Discount Foods(DF), the arguer hastily proposes that the company should replace the CTC by the DF. However, the argument has several flaws as it stands(见过你写unconvincing as it stands 觉得很好，has several flaws 也可以这样啊继续学习了).

First and foremost, the fact that CTC charges the second high in the city and its price has risen in each of last three years does not indicate that its price is not fair. It is possible that the CTC cook food with better materials such as fresh meat, good cooking oil, or they have higher hygienic standard(good point!) thus the CTC deserves the second high price in the city. Additionally, the increase(d) price may result from other factors such as inflation, the enhanced price of material and so forth therefore its increase is reasonable and acceptable. Consequencely, without more accurate evidence about the price in CTC, it is hasty to conclude that its price is unfair.

What's more, lacking the detail of what they argue, the complaint from the 3 employees is not representative in some cases. Providing(With就可以了) only the word 'unbearable', we cannot find out what exactly leads to that. Perhaps it is the crowded dining room which results from the large amount of employees rather than the bad service. Or the 3 workers find that there is not their favourite food because of their unique diet. At the same time, grounding on the complaint from (the可以去掉) merely 3 employees, the conclusion is not so cogent with the possibility that the 3 employees have a much higher criteria on eating. In summary, unless ruling out the possibilities mentioned above, the arguer can make sure the service provided by CTC is responsible for the 'unbearable' experience.

Last but not the least, the comparison between CTC and DF is so incomplete that any conclusion about the service in the two companies seems hasty. It is entirely likely(这里肯定是不是太重了一些) that what the director tastes in the Discount is its best dish(flavor) while other kind of food is not so satisfactory. Meanwhile, no evidence shows that the taste of the director can represent the taste of the majority of the employees in the Cedar Corporation thus the employees probably do not like the food provided by DF despite that the director is content with it(我觉得可以胡诌一些DF很挫的可能性).

To sum up, the argument is well-presented but not well-reasoned. With the fallacies mentioned above, the arguer's proposal seems unconvincing in some cases（many aspects）. In order to give a better suggestion, more accurate and overall evidence should be provided

（我觉得基本上很到位了改不出来更多的东西了）.

考完了呵呵呵