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[作文] 独立+综合写作贴 [复制链接]

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发表于 2011-1-26 12:43:26 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
没有按作文贴的题目写,是自己按照题库和TPO选的题目~第一次交作业~~
综合作文写得偏长了。。

1.24 独立作文
It has been announced that a new restaurant may be built in your neighborhood. Do you support or oppose this plan? Why? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Should we build a new restaurant in our community? Those who criticize building a new restaurant argue that constructing new restaurant will bring some disadvantages.They believe that it may leads to severe pollution on air and water. Even though there may be one or two minor disadvantages to build a new restaurant; however, contrary to the opinion of those people is my heartfelt agreement with the idea of construction of a new restaurant in our neighborhood. I hold the view that the merits of having a new restaurant far outweigh the drawbacks.

First and foremost, numerous conveniences can be brought by the construction of a new restaurant. If there is a new restaurant in our community, people who live here will have more choices of different food. Take me as an example, since I usually have lunch at various restaurants which are close to my home, I already got frustrated by the food of those restaurants. As for people like me, building a new restaurant is a great news. Also, since the restuarant is built in our community, it is easier for us to get access to it. People who live in the neighborhood can save a large amount of time by going to the new restaurant instead of having meals at places far away from our community.

Additionally, building a new restaurant can lead to more job opportunities. As we all known, the economy is in recession worldwide. There is also a group of people who lost their jobs in such a hard time in our community. By constructing a new restaurant, a number of positions of the reataurant can be provided for people who live here. Take the woman who lives close to me as an example, she was an experienced chef who lost her job during the economy crisis. If the new restaurant can be built in our community, I believe that she can acquire a chief position in the new restaurant.

Admittedly, there may be certain quantity of pollution of building a new restaurant, however; the pollution can be controlled or even eliminated as long as we take a series effective measures. One of the ways to controlling pollution is that government exert a policy to regulate the restaurant. In addition, the restaurant will be supervised by public.

From what has been discussed above, we may come to the conclusion that the drawbacks that construction of a new restaurant result in can not compete with the benefits it brings about. As a result, I am still in favor of building a new restaurant in our neighborhood.


1.25综合写作TPO2题目,关于团队合作的问题

The reading passage raises the issue that to assemble a group of people to a team is the best way to approach certain new projects. However, this statement is strongly questioned by the lecture which provides different evidences and argues that there may be a number of disadvantages of team work.

First of all, the professor refutes the viewpoint showed in the passage that the individual team member is much easier to "shine" by saying that the real contributors cannot get benefits. The writer holds the view that
the individual member contributes and ideas can be recognized as highly significanly because a team's overall can be far-reaching. The professor explained that there may be some free riders who didn't contribute to the project but can get benefits from the team. The person who provided a large amount of work cannot be recognized since the project was handed in as a whole group. This is entirely oppose to the writer's expection.


Furthermore, according to the lecture that the project didn't move quickly because it took long for all team members to make an agreemnet, while the writer stated that a group can work more quickly in response to the task because of numbers people involved and the greater resources they possess. These two ideas are contradictory to each other.

Another important point illustrated in the listening material is that there may be one or two members influence other members by coming up with their opinions and make the whole team adopt their views. Some of the team members might have some good ideas, but they may dropped by the one or two group members. And if the ideas proposed by the one or two members are wrong and the project is failed; then all the team members were to be blamed. In contrast, the reading material presents an idea that creative solutions can be come up and people will no doubt feel better about carrying out the work. The opinion directly contradicts what the lecturer indicates.

In general, the speaker discusses that team work lots of drawbacks. This point disagrees that having a team offers several merits demonstrated in the reading. The speaker has totally different ideas on the topics made in the reading passage.
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发表于 2011-1-26 22:38:47 |只看该作者
Should we build a new restaurant in our community? Those who criticize building a new restaurant argue that constructing new restaurant will bring some disadvantages.They believe that it may leads to severe pollution on air and water. Even though there may be one or two minor disadvantages to build a new restaurant; however, contrary to the opinion of those people is my heartfelt agreement with the idea of construction of a new restaurant in our neighborhood. I hold the view that the merits of having a new restaurant far outweigh the drawbacks.

这个开头有点长了 略显拖沓  看这句话( contrary to the opinion of those people is my heartfelt agreement with the idea of ```)用的我实在是很无语 简洁

First and foremost, numerous conveniences can be brought by the construction of a new restaurant. If there is a new restaurant in our community, people who live here will(would) have more choices of different food. Take me as an example, since I usually have lunch at various restaurants which are close to my home, I already got frustrated by the food of those restaurants. As for people like me, building a new restaurant is a great news. Also, since the restuarant is built in our community, it is easier for us to get access to it. People who live in the neighborhood can save a large amount of time by going to the new restaurant instead of having meals at places far away from our community.

Additionally, building a new restaurant can lead to more job opportunities. As we all known, the economy is in recession worldwide. There is also a group of people who lost their jobs in such a hard time in our community. By constructing a new restaurant, a number of positions of the reataurant can be provided for people who live here. Take the woman who lives close to me as an example, she was an experienced chef who lost her job during the economy crisis. If the new restaurant can be built in our community, I believe that she can acquire a chief position in the new restaurant. Admittedly, there may be certain quantity of pollution of building a new restaurant, however; the pollution can be controlled or even eliminated as long as we take a series effective measures. One of the ways to controlling pollution is that government exert a policy to regulate the restaurant. In addition, the restaurant will be supervised by public. (这句话放在本段结尾的目的是···?)

From what has been discussed above, we may come to the conclusion that the drawbacks that construction of a new restaurant result in can not compete with the benefits it brings about. As a result, I am still in favor of building a new restaurant in our neighborhood.

结构完整 用词还不错 开头略显拖沓
总的来说 还行~
逆水深寒觅枭雄

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板凳
发表于 2011-1-27 11:29:10 |只看该作者
2# a08805436
谢谢楼上这位同学帮我改作文啊~~超感激的!!!
关于开头啊,因为是找的网上的一些模板啊,例句仿造写的。是说句子简单要好一些吗?因为我看一些经验什么的都说长难句才能体现水平。。虽然俺水平不高。。
至于那倒数第二段最后一句话其实等于多加个例子吧
谢谢你的评价哦,我自己感觉这篇做作文,句型用词都还偏简单,不知道这样风格的作文拿GOOD有没有希望哦?欢迎批评~~

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地板
发表于 2011-1-27 11:37:20 |只看该作者
1.26独立,还是自己选的题目:If you were an employer, which kind of worker would you prefer to hire: an inexperienced worker at a lower salary or an experienced worker at a higher salary? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Should we hire an inexperienced worker at a lower salary or an experienced worker at a higher salary? Some people may lend their supports to an experienced worker with higher salary, for the reason that it takes long to train a novice. However, if I were an employer, I would prefer to hire an inexperienced worker at a lower salary. Though there may be one or two minor disadvantages to hire a novice, I believe that the benefits of hiring an inexperienced worker far outweigh the drawbacks.

To begin with, hiring an inexperienced worker is much more inexpensive than providing a position to an experienced worker. As we all know, the salary of an inexperienced worker is far and far lower than a person who has much experience. The opponent might argue that it also costs much money to train a new worker. As far as I am concerned, the training expenses can be added to the employee's salary, which means that the inexperienced employee have to pay the training costs by himself or herself. As a result, the costs of hiring a novice are much lower than hiring an experienced employee.

Also, most of the novices are young people, and they have some advantages that experienced workers can not compete with. Usually, the young people are more innovative, for the reason that they have a large amount of new ideas and can accept new ideas quicker. Additionally, since they are young, the speed and the ability of learning are much higher and quicker than other people. What's more? As they are novices and they probably just entered in the real society, they are more aspiring, and they work harder because they want to do well in the first real job. Obviously, the benefits of hiring a novice are much more than offer a job to an experienced worker.

Admittedly, hiring an experienced employee might have some advantages. As an employer, I do not need to spend much time on training employees, since experienced employees already very familiar with their work. Resulting from this benefit, they may make fewer mistakes and can complete their work more efficiently.

However, considerable though the advantages that hiring an experienced worker leads to are, they still can not compete with the benefits that giving an opportunity to an inexperienced worker brings about, when the salary and spirit of innovation are taken into consideration. As a result, I am still agreeing with hiring a novice.

综合是TPO3关于一副画的真假
The reading passage raises the issue that Portrait of an Elderly Woman in a White Bonnet was not a work by Rembrandt. However, the statement is strongly questioned by the lecture which provides different evidences and argues that this work of art was Rembrandt's autography.

First of all, the professor refutes the view point showed in the reading that there is an inconsistency of the woman's cap and her coat's fur collar by saying that the fur collar was added by others a hundred years later. Because they thought adding a fur collar can increase the painting's value. These two ideas are contradictory to each other.

Furthermore, according to the lecture if the fur collar is removed, and the original painting will show that the light-colored cloth, which reflect the light to the woman's face. In contrast, the writer stated that because of the dark fur collar, the woman's face should appear partially in shadow instead of showing light color.

Another important point illustrated in the listening material is that the wood panel was added later when the fur collar was added, and the original painting is painted on a single wood, which actually was from the very same tree as another Rembrandt's work. Whereas, the reading presents a conflicting idea that the panel was of several pieces of wood glued together, which is not Rembrandt's style.

In general, the speaker discusses that Portrait of an Elderly Woman in a White Bonnet was a work by Rembrandt indeed. This point disagrees that this painting is not Rembrandt's work demonstrated in the reading. The speaker has a totally different ideas on the topic made in the passage.

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发表于 2011-1-27 14:59:59 |只看该作者
1.26号独立作文已改好!
附件: 你需要登录才可以下载或查看附件。没有帐号?立即注册

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发表于 2011-1-28 13:45:14 |只看该作者
5# 坠坠芙蓉影
谢谢帮忙修改作文,觉得有蛮多启发的,ps我没写过G的作文啊。。

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发表于 2011-1-28 13:49:20 |只看该作者
1.27独立作文,政府应该把更多的钱花在电脑技术上还是基本生活上?
Whether the government spends much money on developing computer technology or meeting basic needs? Those who lend their supports to the development of computer technology claim that computer technology is an essential part of the development of a country. However, contrary to the opinion of these people, I believe that the government ought to do more budgets for meeting basic needs.

Admittedly, there are some benefits of spending money on computer technology. The development of computer technology impacts the growth of the whole technology in a country significantly. As we all know, the computer technology is the basis of a great number of other technologies. Considerable though the advantages that paying for fostering computer technology leads to are, they can not compete with the benefits that to do more budgets on meeting basic needs brings about, when the living standards of people's life and the growth of economy are taken into account.

In my opinion, spending more money on solving the problems as meeting basic needs can result in promotion of the aggregate living standards of people's life. Take the public transportation as an example; if the government considered spending the expenses to improve public transportation, such as bus, subway and train, it is easier for people to commute between their homes and work places. Consequently, the time spend on traveling everyday can be decreased, which may lead to the increase of efficiency on their work. Another instance is the quality of food, if government pay more attention and spend more money on the problem of food quality, there may be no more tragedies as low quality food caused people’s illness even death. In contrast, people will live better life with eating high quality food and being healthy.

Another benefit of costing more on dealing with basic needs issue for government is the growth of economy and increase in the stability of society. As far as I am concerned, once the basic needs of people are fulfilled, it is very possible for them to concentrate on their own work. As the increase of employees’ efficiency on their worker, they can complete more work as the same time they spent before. As a result, the more they are able to finish their work, the more the growth of economy can be led to. In addition, as the majority of people’s life is improved, they may do not have motivation to commit crimes anymore. Sequently, the crime rate declines and society becomes more stable than before.

Taking all the factors into consideration, the advantages of spending more money on fulfilling basic needs far outweigh that of paying much cost on computer technology. From my point of view, more money should be spent on basic needs.

综合作文TPO4的题,关于恐龙是不是恒温动物
The reading passage raises the issue that dinosaurs were endotherms. However, the statement is strongly questioned by the lecture which provides different evidences and argues that dinosaurs actually were not endotherms.

First of all, the professor refutes the viewpoint in showed in the passage that dinosaur fossils have been discovered in polar regions and only endotherms could be active in such cold climate by saying that polar area was much warmer than today at that time. Also, the speaker added the point that when the climate was getting colder, dinosaurs migrated to warmer areas or hibernated. This entirely oppose to the writer's expectation.

Furthermore, according to the lecturer that the legs of dinosaurs are positioned underneath the body does not mean they were endotherms, for the reason that this position of legs can support more weight and dinosaurs can grow in to large size. The large size is a significant advantage for a dinosaur. Whereas, the writer stated that legs of all modern endotherms are underneath the body, so were the legs of dinosaurs. These two ideas are contradictory to each other.

Another important point illustrated in the listening material is that though dinosaurs have haversian canals, while they also have growth rings which indicated that they stop growing or grow slower in the cold periods. This is another characteristic of an animal which is not an endotherm, and endotherms always grow rapidly anytime.

In general, the speaker discussed the problem of dinosaurs were not endotherms that the reading viewed in a contrary angle.

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