[a习作temp] argument25 大家一起拍啊！ [复制链接]

sqsleehom
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发表于 2011-10-7 19:18:13 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由 sqsleehom 于 2011-10-7 19:24 编辑

25.The following was written as a part of an application for a small-business loan by a group of developers in the city of Monroe.
"A jazz music club in Monroe would be a tremendously profitable enterprise. Currently, the nearest jazz club is 65 miles away; thus, the proposed new jazz club in Monroe, the C-Note, would have the local market all to itself. Plus, jazz is extremely popular in Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's annual jazz festival last summer; several well-known jazz musicians live in Monroe; and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly,' which airs every weeknight at 7 P.M. Finally, a nationwide study indicates that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment."
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
In this application, the loan applicant asserts that a jazz music club in M would be a huge profitable enterprise. To strength the assertion the applicant points out that there is no jazz club in or near the Monroe city and jazz is popular in Monroe. In addition, the applicant also cites a national study which indicates that jazz fans spend a lot of money on jazz. However, in order to justify the rationality of the assertion, this supporting evidence is insufficient, and some more evidence concerning the J in M should be provided.

Although the arguer provides some information about the j in M, however, the arguer failed to provide enough valid evidence to convince us that the j is really popular. Firstly, if the residents in M are really interested in J, why there is no J club until now? Secondly, the number of people attended the festival last year is too vague to be informative. The arguer does not indicate that these people are all local residents; maybe a lot of them come from other cities to enjoy the performance of well-known jazz musicians. Finally, the resident of famous jazz musicians is also unreliable evidence. The arguer neglects other motivations why they live there. It's entirely possible that they live there just for the serene environment, for no fantastic JF to disturb their normal lives. In short, without figuring these things out, the arguer cannot simply conclude that the jazz is popular in M.
The arguer also fails to provide evidence that the club in Monroe will attract many people. Even if the residents in m really love jazz and like to listen to jazz radio programs, it does not follow that they will join the club. After all, attending the club will cost money while listen to the programs are free of charge. The arguer should be better to make certain that how many people will be willing to join the jazz club.
Besides, we want to know that whether the jazz expenditures in M are in accord with the nationwide tendency. In the absence of detailed information in M, it is possible that the economy in M is less development, and the living standard of people are relatively low, people rarely have extra money to pay for jazz entertainment. If so, the nationwide study the arguer cites cannot well bolster the assertion that C-note club will be very profitable.
Finally, although the nearest j club is far way from M, there is no evidence to ensure that the CN will have the local market all to itself. Perhaps, the jazz fans that usually go to these jazz clubs are not all willing to change to CN. To those fantastic fans, 65 miles is not the question, when comparing to their enthusiasm. So to better sustain the assertion, the arguer should try to figure out that the CN have more competitiveness than other clubs, such as better basic equipments, much more famous j stars and so on.
In conclusion, without such evidence above, the assertion that opening a J club will be profitable is unconvincing. To support the assertion the arguer should demonstrate that people in Monroe really love jazz and are willing to attend the club. Besides, the arguer should also guarantee that CN will be more attractive to these fans.