寄托天下
查看: 912|回复: 2
打印 上一主题 下一主题

[a习作temp] argument174 [0710G +U Aug小组]第7次作业 ldsun [复制链接]

Rank: 2

声望
2
寄托币
266
注册时间
2007-4-17
精华
0
帖子
9
跳转到指定楼层
楼主
发表于 2007-7-31 17:00:27 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
This recommendation states that a majority of faculty members of Grove College (GC) voted coeducation for that it would encourage more students to apply to GC. Thanks to this fact, the president and administrative staff made this recommendation that GC should continue its century-old tradition of all-female education. To support this suggestion, they cite two different surveys to prove that the students and alumni are unwilling to coeducation. However, with my reflection, I think this argument flaws and I will discuss them in turn.

First of all, this argument is based on the suggestion made by those faculty members. However, it does not provide any information to show that suggestion is unreasonable. On the consideration of the objective of this argument, I think no such information makes it unpersuasive for that it is a threshold problem. Maybe it is true that coeducation would encourage more students to apply, which benefits the college most and the governing committee would take this suggestion first. Under this circumstance, the argument is untenable.

Secondly, the mere fact that eighty percent of the students responding to the survey wanted the college to remain all female is insufficient to support the recommendation. We are not informed that how many students involved in the survey, and what is the percentage of the students who responded to the survey. Without such information, it is entirely possible that only a small part of students attended or responded the survey, then the results derived from eighty percent of the students responding to the survey would be unpersuasive.

Last but not least, the argument provides insufficient information to show the rationality of its survey. Take the survey for the alumni as an example. We are only informed the results of the survey, and we do not know detailed reasons. It might be temping to imply that the question on the survey was specially set to conclude that result easily. Lacking such essential information, the surveys lend little support to the recommendation as it stands.

Simply put, this argument is untenable as discussion showed above. To improve it, the president and administrative staff should provide some evidence directly to prove the suggestion made by faculty is wrong and more information about the two surveys.
回应
0

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
2
寄托币
266
注册时间
2007-4-17
精华
0
帖子
9
沙发
发表于 2007-7-31 17:02:05 |只看该作者
thank you!

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
0
寄托币
160
注册时间
2007-1-17
精华
0
帖子
0
板凳
发表于 2007-7-31 22:30:20 |只看该作者
This recommendationstates that a majority of faculty members of Grove College (GC) votedcoeducation for that it would encourage more students to apply to GC.Thanks to this fact(这开头好奇怪,什么thanks ?说not agree with还差不多), the president and administrative staff (你把题目第一句都看仔细了?细心,不过可能有点使开头段过复杂)made thisrecommendation that GC should continue its century-old tradition ofall-female education. To support this suggestion, they cite twodifferent surveys to prove that the students and alumni are unwillingto coeducation. However, with my reflection, I think this argumentflaws and I will discuss them in turn.

First of all, this argumentis based on the suggestion made by those faculty members. However, itdoes not provide any information to show that suggestion isunreasonable. On the consideration of the objective of this argument, Ithink no such information makes it unpersuasive for that it is athreshold problem. Maybe it is true that coeducation would encouragemore students to apply, which benefits the college most and thegoverning committee would take this suggestion first. Under thiscircumstance, the argument is untenable.

Secondly, the mere(去掉,下面不是还有个survey吗) factthat eighty percent of the students responding to the survey wanted (want) thecollege to remain all female is insufficient to support therecommendation. We are not informed that how many students involved inthe survey, and what is the percentage of the students who responded tothe survey(不是说了eighty percent吗,你要提的是是否具有代表性,你说的调查人数多少可能也是这个意思。调查问卷题目设置是否公平). Without such information, it is entirely possible that onlya small part of students attended or responded the survey, then theresults derived from eighty percent of the students responding to thesurvey would be unpersuasive.

Last but not least, theargument provides insufficient information to show the rationality ofits survey. Take the survey for the alumni as an example.(你这样说也行,但直接说the survey on alumni  merely inform us the results....不是更明白吗) We are onlyinformed the results of the survey, and we do not know detailedreasons. It might be temping to imply that the question on the surveywas specially set to conclude that result easily. Lacking suchessential information, the surveys lend little support to therecommendation as it stands.

Simply put, this argumentis untenable as discussion showed above. To improve it, the presidentand administrative staff should provide some evidence directly to provethe suggestion made by faculty is wrong and more information about thetwo surveys.
(批判点是找对的,但批判力度不够。还有一点可批:alumni  support the college 是不充分的 ,调查反对男女同校的未必会资助学校,而愿资助学校的的也许赞成男女同校。improve the morale among students 也不充分,完全女生问题更多。或许学校的师资、环境、研究氛围才能提升morale)鼠标坏了,无法选中句子,所以不能改颜色了,望见谅。

使用道具 举报

RE: argument174 [0710G +U Aug小组]第7次作业 ldsun [修改]
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 立即注册

问答
Offer
投票
面经
最新
精华
转发
转发该帖子
argument174 [0710G +U Aug小组]第7次作业 ldsun
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-713222-1-1.html
复制链接
发送
报offer 祈福 爆照
回顶部