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[i习作temp] issue207 【OB小组】第12次作业-stonescj-仪式与文化 [复制链接]

stonescj
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电梯直达

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发表于 2007-7-24 19:54:53 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

ISSUE207 - "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."

I fundamentally agree with the assertion that rituals and ceremonies have played a significant role in defining a culture. Nevertheless, it is not the unique means to support the sense of societies or groups.

To begin with, no one could deny the important function that the rituals and ceremonies have applied on culture. That is to say, rituals and ceremonies are formalized behaviors and rules set for special occasions. Actually, those ceremonies have reflected people’s beliefs. For instance, pilgrimages are regularly going to the Church to pray for themselves and family. Chinese people have a custom to boating on dragon boat festival to commemorate on of the greatest poets of China- Quyuan. People of Mohammedanism do not eat pork. Moreover, it is a sacred moment when we participated in our magnificent graduation ceremonies, it is an inspirer moment that when the civilian saw the inaugurations of presidents. So rituals and ceremonies not only have witnessed various precious occasions but also make it possible to express the sensation and hopes of people through rituals and ceremonies.

Furthermore, rituals and ceremonies help people to establish and develop a distinctive culture that different from others. Take Great Wall for example, the ceremony in Beijing is not only in memory of the first Great Emperor Qin but also pay a tribute to the hardworking and industrious spirit of Chinese people. In fact, a lot of characteristic ethical spirits have melt into rituals and ceremonies and being with it permanently. What’ more, ancient China prefer to using sedan chair and bride dressed in red clothes which stand for propitious life to celebrate their wedding, otherwise, western countries usually hold their weddings in Church and pull on white skirt which indicate chastity, different wedding ceremonies have represented different culture customs. Due to
these multifarious culture, people could learn from each other and the world could become so colorful.

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies are not the unique quomodo to sustain the sense of societies or groups, on the contrary, there are also a lot of other important factors such as language, letter, raiment and so forth. It is known that language and letter could be seemed as a mainstay spirit of a country or group. Generally, language is the crystal of history and ancestor's wisdom, which have developed and enhanced from generation to generation.The raiment style also represents the culture of a nation. Women in Arabia must envelop in cloth from head to toe even in hot weather, a lot of minority in China still possess their special national clothes to retain their distinctive culture. As a result, except rituals and ceremonies, other factors are also important forms to exhibit a culture.

To sum up, rituals and ceremonies are significant factors to define a culture, meanwhile, other ingredients could not be neglect. Only we pay attention to all these elements could we establish a more comfortable and flourishing society.

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ldongxp
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沙发

发表于 2007-7-24 22:14:08 |只看该作者

ISSUE207 - "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."
I fundamentally agree with the assertion that rituals and ceremonies have played a significant role in defining a culture. Nevertheless, it is not the unique means to support the sense of societies or groups.

To begin with, no one could deny the important function that the rituals and ceremonies have applied on culture. That is to say, rituals and ceremonies are formalized behaviors and rules set for special occasions. Actually, those ceremonies have reflected people’s beliefs. For instance, pilgrimages are regularly going to the Church to pray for themselves and [their] family. Chinese people have a custom to boating on dragon boat festival to commemorate on of the greatest poets of China- Quyuan. [belief？] People of Mohammedanism do not eat pork. Moreover, it is a sacred moment when we participated in our magnificent graduation ceremonies, it is an inspirer moment that when the civilian saw the inaugurations of presidents. So rituals and ceremonies not only have witnessed various precious occasions but also make it possible to express the sensation and hopes of people through rituals and ceremonies. [最好跟culture说近点]

Furthermore, rituals and ceremonies help people to establish and develop a distinctive culture that different from others. Take Great Wall for example, the ceremony in Beijing is not only in memory of the first Great Emperor Qin but also pay a tribute to the hardworking and industrious spirit of Chinese people. [这里说清楚点是怎么建立文化的] In fact, a lot of characteristic ethical spirits have melt into rituals and ceremonies and being with it permanently. What’ more, ancient China prefer to using sedan chair and bride dressed in red clothes which stand for propitious life to celebrate their wedding, otherwise, western countries usually hold their weddings in Church and pull on white skirt which indicate chastity, different wedding ceremonies have represented different culture customs. Due to these multifarious culture, people could learn from each other and the world could become so colorful. [回应建立文化比较好]

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies are not the unique quomodo to sustain the sense of societies or groups, on the contrary, there are also a lot of other important factors such as language, letter, raiment and so forth. It is known that language and letter could be seemed as a mainstay spirit of a country or group. Generally, language is the crystal of history and ancestor's wisdom, which have developed and enhanced from generation to generation. The raiment style also represents the culture of a nation. Women in Arabia must envelop in cloth from head to toe even in hot weather, a lot of minority in China still possess their special national clothes to retain their distinctive culture. As a result, except [besides] rituals and ceremonies, other factors are also important forms to exhibit a culture.

To sum up, rituals and ceremonies are significant factors to define a culture, meanwhile, other ingredients could not be neglected. Only we pay attention to all these elements could we establish a more comfortable and flourishing society.
[不错,词汇丰富，表达多样,注意小结的时候，点点题]

坚持就是胜利！ KedGRE

ldongxp的习作汇总帖 http://bbs.gter.ce.cn/bbs/thread-702004-1-1.html

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phillipsarea
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板凳

发表于 2007-7-24 22:23:07 |只看该作者

I fundamentally agree with the assertion that rituals and ceremonies have played a significant role in defining a culture. Nevertheless, it is not the unique means to support the sense of societies or groups.

To begin with, no one could deny the important function that the rituals and ceremonies have applied on culture. That is to say, rituals and ceremonies are formalized behaviors and rules set for special occasions. Actually, those ceremonies have reflected people’s beliefs. For instance, pilgrimages are regularly going to the Church to pray for themselves and family. Chinese people have a custom to boating(boating是名词) on dragon boat festival to commemorate on of the greatest poets of China- Quyuan. People of Mohammedanism do not eat pork. Moreover, it is a sacred moment when we participated in our magnificent graduation ceremonies, it is an inspirer moment that when the civilian saw the inaugurations of presidents. So rituals and ceremonies not only have witnessed various precious occasions but also make it possible to express the sensation and hopes of people through rituals and ceremonies.(论述到位)

Furthermore, rituals and ceremonies help people to establish and develop a distinctive culture that different from others. Take Great Wall for example, the ceremony in Beijing is not only in memory of the first Great Emperor Qin but also pay a tribute to the hardworking and industrious spirit of Chinese people. In fact, a lot of characteristic ethical spirits have melt into rituals and ceremonies and being with it permanently. What’ more, ancient China prefer to using sedan chair and bride dressed in red clothes which stand for propitious life to celebrate their wedding, otherwise, people in western countries usually hold their weddings in Church and pull on white skirt(不是skirt吧?!礼服吧,我不知道怎样表达,你查查)robewhich indicate chastity, different wedding ceremonies have represented different culture customs. Due to these multifarious culture, people could learn from each other and the world could become so colorful.

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies are not the unique quomodo to sustain the sense of societies or groups, on the contrary, there are also a lot of other important factors such as language, letter, raiment and so forth. It is known that language and letter could be seemed as a mainstay spirit of a country or group. Generally, language is the crystal of history and ancestor's wisdom, which have developed and enhanced from generation to generation.The raiment style also represents the culture of a nation. Women in Arabia must envelop in cloth from head to toe even in hot weather, a lot of minority in China still possess their special national clothes to retain their distinctive culture. As a result, except rituals and ceremonies, other factors are also important forms to exhibit a culture.

To sum up, rituals and ceremonies are significant factors to define a culture, meanwhile, other ingredients could not be neglect. Only we pay attention to all these elements could we establish a more comfortable and flourishing society.

文章中缺少了对"Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."的分析.审题要仔细些啊~!

Final Decision: UCLA

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stonescj
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地板

发表于 2007-7-24 23:26:03 |只看该作者

还是没有逃过phillipsarea的眼睛，好好改改了要

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xiao8686
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5楼

发表于 2007-7-25 02:26:52 |只看该作者

I fundamentally agree with the assertion that rituals and ceremonieshave played a significant role in defining a culture. Nevertheless, itis not the unique means to support the sense of societies or groups.
审题清楚

To begin with, no one could deny the important function that therituals and ceremonies have applied on culture. That is to say, ritualsand ceremonies are formalized behaviors and rules set for specialoccasions. Actually, those ceremonies have reflected people’s beliefs.For instance, pilgrimages are regularly going to the Church to pray forthemselves and family. Chinese people have a custom to boating ondragon boat festival to commemorate on of the greatest poets of China-Quyuan. People of Mohammedanism do not eat pork. Moreover, it is asacred moment when we participated in our magnificent graduationceremonies, it is an inspirer moment that when the civilian saw theinaugurations of presidents. So rituals and ceremonies not only havewitnessed various precious occasions but also make it possible toexpress the sensation and hopes of people through rituals andceremonies.（其实这一段的说理蛮好的，但是要跟反映culture联系起来，反映人们的思想和culture还是一些距离的，需要一两句话接起来，那样就ok了）

Furthermore, rituals and ceremonies help people to establish anddevelop a distinctive culture that different from others. Take GreatWall for example, the ceremony in Beijing is not only in memory of thefirst Great Emperor Qin but also pay a tribute to the hardworking andindustrious spirit of Chinese people. In fact, a lot of characteristicethical spirits have melt into rituals and ceremonies and being with itpermanently. What’ more, ancient China prefer to using sedan chair andbride dressed in red clothes which stand for propitious life tocelebrate their wedding, otherwise, western countries usually holdtheir weddings in Church and pull on white skirt which indicatechastity, different wedding ceremonies have represented differentculture customs. Due to
these multifarious culture, people could learn from each other and the world could become so colorful.（最后那个multifarious culture和people learn from each other的论点和文章第一个论点有些相反。如果要同时表达两个不一样的论点，应该在第一句就有所提及的。）

Admittedly, rituals and ceremonies are not the unique quomodo tosustain the sense of societies or groups, on the contrary, there arealso a lot of other important factors such as language, letter, raimentand so forth. It is known that language and letter could be seemed as amainstay spirit of a country or group. Generally, language is thecrystal of history and ancestor's wisdom, which have developed andenhanced from generation to generation.（这里最好还具体说一下，或者一句话把language和culture之间的关系说明）The raiment style alsorepresents the culture of a nation. Women in Arabia must envelop incloth from head to toe even in hot weather, a lot of minority in Chinastill possess their special national clothes to retain theirdistinctive culture. As a result, except rituals and ceremonies, otherfactors are also important forms to exhibit a culture.

To sum up, rituals and ceremonies are significant factors to define aculture, meanwhile, other ingredients could not be neglect. Only we payattention to all these elements could we establish a more comfortableand flourishing society.

08 fall Polymer

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