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kingplough
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电梯直达

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发表于 2008-10-21 07:40:32 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

TOPIC: ISSUE48 - "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

History is made by the people, but this does not preclude the people from respecting outstanding individuals. In my view, focusing on famous few is indispensible for the study of history, subject to the proviso that the basic force boosting social changes comes from the masses.

First of all, no one can deny that the masses play a vital role in making significant events and trends in history. Groups of people are the main body to create advanced productive forces as well as the fundamental force to realize their interests. The progress of society is also the process which human beings striving for a better life. When we look back on the history, we will find that all the evolutions in history is sparked and accomplished by the accumulative efforts of masses. Take American independence revolution for instance, without millions of people's struggle toward English colonists, how can United States come into being? Although their names were not all recorded in the history, people cannot forget the contribution of them. Or consider the greatest achievements in human civilization, which are all attributed to the efforts of large group of nameless people. For example, China's Great Wall and Egypt's pyramids are both constructed by millions of nameless slaves. Simply put, history, in the final analysis, is made by the people.

What is more, only by considering the efforts of masses can we understand the trends in history correctly and thoroughly. Too much focusing on famous few would prevent us concerning the comings and goings of social changes. For example, when we concern the American civil war, we always attribute the emancipation of slaves to President Lincoln. However, the forces behind the civil war mainly come from the suffering of slaves themselves. To some extent, it is not President Lincoln emancipated them, but slaves themselves obtained their freedom. In significant changes in history, the great leaders serve as the sparker and catalyst, not the creator of them. Only the study of masses can provide us a richly-textured, substantive framework for interpreting the social changes in history.

Nevertheless, we cannot neglect significance of the great figures during the study of history. For one thing, people should memorize them for their outstanding contributions for the progress of society. In history, many great persons devoted their lifetime for the welfare of the people. They gathered and led groups of people to strive for a better society which have more freedom and more prosperity. For example, Gandhi, the political and spiritual leader of Indian independence movement, made the way of non-violent civil disobedience, by which the India gained independence eventually. What is more, the non-violent civil disobedience movement also inspired Martin Luther King, who led American civil rights movements into success. For another, at least in a short-term social trend, the famous new have the vital impact to the society. For example, China's ten-year Cultural Revolution is mainly caused by Mao, the first president of China. It is his mistake made China waste ten years in class struggles other than economic development.

In fact, it is reasonable that people put more emphasis on famous few in the study of history. According to the limitation of historical documents, it is impossible to record everyone and everything. Famous few who serve as the representation of the people are more likely to be recorded in history. Memorize them does not mean deny the efforts of masses. Furthermore, stories of great figures are helpful for the study of history. For one thing, the great figures in history can serve as the models for moral education. For another, through the vivid story of the famous few, students can memorize the significant events in history more easily.

In conclusion, the nameless masses and the famous few both play an important role in the significant events and trends in history. We should strike a balance between them during the study of history.

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StrayCrow
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沙发

发表于 2008-10-21 21:38:49 |只看该作者

上课写文章忙得焦头烂额~ 过会帮你改

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StrayCrow
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板凳

发表于 2008-10-21 22:42:16 |只看该作者

TOPIC: ISSUE48 - "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten."

History is made by the people, but this does not preclude the people from respecting outstanding individuals.我不是很理解这句话是什么意思 In my view, focusing on famous few is indispensible for the study of history, subject to the proviso that the basic force boosting social changes comes from the masses.

First of all, no one can deny that the masses play a vital role in making significant events and trends in history. Groups of people are the main body to create advanced productive forces as well as the fundamental force to realize their interests. The progress of society is also the process which human beings striving for a better life. When we look back on the history, we will find that all the evolutions in history is sparked and accomplished by the accumulative efforts of masses. Take American independence revolution for instance, without millions of people's struggle toward English colonists, how can United States come into being? Although their names were not all recorded in the history, people cannot forget the contribution of them. Or consider the greatest achievements in human civilization, which are all attributed to the efforts of large group of nameless people. For example, China's Great Wall and Egypt's pyramids are both constructed by millions of nameless slaves.有点偏文化不过文化也是历史 Simply put, history, in the final analysis, is made by the people.

What is more, only by considering the efforts of masses can we understand the trends in history correctly and thoroughly. Too much focusing on famous few would prevent us concerning the comings and goings of social changes. For example, when we concern the American civil war, we always attribute the emancipation of slaves to President Lincoln. However, the forces behind the civil war mainly come from the suffering of slaves themselves. To some extent, it is not President Lincoln emancipated them, but slaves themselves obtained their freedom. In significant changes in history, the great leaders serve as the sparker and catalyst, not the creator of them.不错高度概括 Only the study of masses can provide us a richly-textured, substantive framework for interpreting the social changes in history.

Nevertheless, we cannot neglect significance of the great figures during the study of history. For one thing, people should memorize them for their outstanding contributions for the progress of society. In history, many great persons devoted their lifetime for(devote to?) the welfare of the people. They gathered and led groups of people to strive for a better society which have more freedom and more prosperity. For example, Gandhi, the political and spiritual leader of Indian independence movement, made the way of non-violent civil disobedience, by which the India gained independence eventually. What is more, the non-violent civil disobedience movement also inspired Martin Luther King, who led American civil rights movements into success. For another, at least in a short-term social trend, the famous new have the vital impact to the society. For example, China's ten-year Cultural Revolution is mainly caused by Mao, the first president of China. It is his mistake made China waste ten years in class struggles other than economic development.

In fact, it is reasonable that people put more emphasis on famous few in the study of history. According to the limitation of historical documents, it is impossible to record everyone and everything. Famous few who serve as the representation of the people are more likely to be recorded in history. Memorize them does not mean deny the efforts of masses.这几句很不错很清晰 Furthermore, stories of great figures are helpful for the study of history. For one thing, the great figures in history can serve as the models for moral education. For another这个重复用让人印象很深刻所以还是换一个吧, through the vivid story of the famous few, students can memorize the significant events in history more easily.

In conclusion, the nameless masses and the famous few both play an important role in the significant events and trends in history. We should strike a balance between them during the study of history.

又是一个strike a balance
恩看来你现在写issue也已经自成套路了看起来感觉很像看argument
快考试了就不具体谈issue的思辨方向了
这篇文章例子用了不少
但是感觉还是太典型了判卷老师可能容易腻味
其实历史题是最容易找例子的何况这篇就是在说历史人物
在考试前在准备几个别的例子吧
中庸写作很保险而且能体现批判性但是个人感觉很难出彩如果你不在例子上或者文章写作风格上有所改变
结尾太草率平庸了开头也是可以再想想这个都是考试前还能努力的吧
不过现在你写aw已经很顺手了
考试加油阿！！！
大家一起准备这么久看你文章长大的 :loveliness:
明天在练一篇argument吧别把argu给忘了

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kingplough
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地板

发表于 2008-10-21 23:57:49 |只看该作者

我要求不高，只要考试的时候能把这样子中庸，字数充足的文章不犯太多错误的写出来，就满足拉：）
本来奢望4.5，现在只要有4分就很开心了。

谢谢你这么忙还来帮我改，argu这就写

希望后天大家都顺利

更希望你后天一次考过！

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oyhd
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5楼

发表于 2008-10-22 00:58:54 |只看该作者

issue48, 求拍，考前第三天 TOPIC: ISSUE48 - "The study of history places too much emphasis on individuals. The most significant events and trends in history were made possible not by the famous few, but by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten." History is made by the people, but this does not preclude the people from respecting outstanding individuals. In my view, focusing on famous few is indispensible for the study of history, subject to the proviso that the basic force boosting social changes comes from the masses.(这属于什么语法结构?没看懂-_-!) First of all, no one can deny that (题目让你论证主要是人民创造历史,你上来用no one can deny 人民创造了历史不太好吧?委婉一点会好一点)the masses play a vital role in making significant events and trends in history. Groups of people are the main body to create advanced productive forces as well as the fundamental force to realize their interests. The progress of society is also the process which human beings striving for a better life. When we look back on the history, we will find that all the evolutions in history is sparked and accomplished by the accumulative efforts of masses. Take American independence revolution for instance, without millions of people's struggle toward English colonists, how can United States come into being? Although their names were not all recorded in the history, people cannot forget the contribution of them. Or consider the greatest achievements in human civilization, which are all attributed to the efforts of large group of nameless people. For example, China's Great Wall and Egypt's pyramids are both constructed by millions of nameless slaves. Simply put, history, in the final analysis, is made by the people.似乎有点不是很恰当这个例子长城不是历史事件 What is more, only by considering the efforts of masses can we understand the trends in history correctly and thoroughly. Too much focusing on famous few would prevent us concerning the comings and goings of social changes. For example, when we concern the American civil war, we always attribute the emancipation of slaves to President Lincoln. However, the forces behind the civil war mainly come from the suffering of slaves themselves. To some extent, it is not President Lincoln emancipated them, but slaves themselves obtained their freedom. In significant changes in history, the great leaders serve as the sparker and catalyst, not the creator of them. Only the study of masses can provide us a richly-textured, substantive framework for interpreting the social changes in history. Nevertheless,(让步一般不用这个词吧?这个词后跟的一般是主旨) we cannot neglect significance of the great figures during the study of history. For one thing, people should memorize them for their outstanding contributions for the progress of society. In history, many great persons devoted their lifetime for the welfare of the people. They gathered and led groups of people to strive for a better society which have more freedom and more prosperity. For example, Gandhi, the political and spiritual leader of Indian independence movement, made the way of non-violent civil disobedience, by which the India gained independence eventually. What is more, the non-violent civil disobedience movement also inspired Martin Luther King, who led American civil rights movements into success. For another, at least in a short-term social trend, the famous new have the vital impact to the society. For example, China's ten-year Cultural Revolution is mainly caused by Mao, the first president of China. It is his mistake made China waste ten years in class struggles other than economic development. In fact, it is reasonable that people put more emphasis on famous few in the study of history. According to the limitation of historical documents, it is impossible to record everyone and everything. Famous few who serve as the representation of the people are more likely to be recorded in history. Memorize them does not mean deny the efforts of masses. Furthermore, stories of great figures are helpful for the study of history. For one thing, the great figures in history can serve as the models for moral education. For another, through the vivid story of the famous few, students can memorize the significant events in history more easily. In conclusion, the nameless masses and the famous few both play an important role in the significant events and trends in history. We should strike a balance between them during the study of history. 怎么说呢?整体上看是篇没啥问题的文章. 但是我在你上篇里推荐的追星剑关于破题的帖子不知道你看了没有.我觉的你破题的方向还是可以有小小的提高的. 另外,你应该有信心的4.5应该没问题,不过不是我改卷子.呵呵.
How time flies.你都要考了. Good luck!

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