[i习作temp] issue 16, 还有十一天考了，这篇文章感觉写的一般，能帮我看看吗？ [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-4-9 23:53:40 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

TOPIC: ISSUE16 - "Although many people think that the luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life are entirely harmless, in fact, they actually prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals."
WORDS: 655
TIME: 00:43:36
DATE: 2009-4-9 23:36:58

According to the speaker, he/she claims that the luxuries and conveniences of contemporary life actually prevent people from developing into truly strong and independent individuals. As far as I am concerned, albeit the speaker's statement is not entirely without the support from empirical experience, I still cannot absolutely agree with this extreme position because his/her viewpoints to the influence of those luxuries and conveniences are too bigoted and oversimplified.

To begin with, it is fundamentally believed that contemporary luxuries and convenience do exert negative influence on people's dependence in modern times. On the one hand, present masses terribly depend on those sophisticated machines to help them in their daily lives. Since last century has witnessed a miraculous progress in the realm of science and technology, tons of advanced mechanism spring out gradually. At present, people would use personal computers to achieve complex calculations or designing, take car, bike or aircraft to arrive in their destinations, and rely on automobiles to communicate with others. If those advanced machines once disappear, people might lose dozens of enjoyment and convenience or even be unable to survive on Earth. On the other hand, the society seems to be more interdependent to some extent. Thanks to the invention of cell phones and the establishment of the Internet, the world becomes smaller whilst the people become connected more firmly. In the face of a choice, people would consult their friends through telephone, or learn others' experience from the Internet, rather than directly make selection by themselves. Therefore, those conveniences do prevent people from developing into independent individuals.

Beyond the concession, however, I cannot totally agree with the speaker's statement because it seems to overlook the disadvantages or even dangers elicited by those luxuries. In fact, the luxuries truly serve dangerous purposes in both social level and individual level. For one thing, in social level, luxuries certainly result in plenty of wastes. In retrospect, huge amounts of fortune have been squandered to create those luxuries, such as sumptuous constructions, luxurious jewelries and the like. Since still thousands of people are living in poverty, famine and diseases in certain corner of the world, those funds for luxuries had better be used to improve the lives of such victims rather than to satisfy one’s extravagance. For another, in individual level, luxuries do exert negative influence on individual development. Dozens of people turn to be crimes because they are abetted to commit crimes by those luxuries, such as robbing, thieving, or appropriating and the like. Apparently, sometimes one's characters and behaviors would be distorted by those luxuries which sorely tempt them. Thus, rather than being regarded as harmless, the luxuries actually play perilous roles in modern societies.

Finally, last but not least, empirical experience dedicates that the conveniences might also propel one's independence in several dimensions. Although masses would rely on the Internet and the cell phones to connect with outside world, but others' ideas and experience surely facilitate one's independent planning and designing. In the realm of tourism, travelers would be able to plan their own trips owing to sufficient information and tips in the Internet. Since the establishment of the Internet, plentiful BBS which is filled with other's experience and notes about certain issue eventually has swept over the net. More and more people design their own itineraries and go travelling independently. In the realm of education, students are able to do much more self-studies through those electronic products. Such upgrade of educational equipment creates a veritable environment for students and provides sufficient teaching materials outside the school. Instead of being taught in classroom, people can learn personally by electronic dictionary, long-range education and the like. Hence, accounting for foregoing further independence of people, the functions of those conveniences might be reconsidered.

To sum up, the independence and interdependence of the present people are simultaneously affected by those conveniences, whilst the luxuries should be surely regarded as harms for both society and individual. In fact, we should reconsider the values and functions of those conveniences and luxuries more cautiously and modestly.

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