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[活动] Dark_Tournament写作小组legolastu第十九作业 [复制链接]

legolastu
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电梯直达

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发表于 2009-4-8 15:41:12 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important for u a teacher try to help students to gain self-confidence than to teach them specific knowledge. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Whether it is more important for a teacher to help students gain their self-confidence or teach them some more detailed knowledge is really a debating problem. Some people advocate the latter viewpoint while others do not. But, in my opinion, I would more agree that self-confidence should be treated more important.

To begin with, one can not deny the fact that we are living in an information explosion era. When it comes to the discussion that which knowledge the school should choose for students to learn, everyone has his various opinions. The basic abstract theories, the applied technologies, or the dubious hypothesis that might bring human beings great interest is difficult for us to rank the sequence of importance. A Chinese old proverb says that to give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, but teach him how to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. The most significant thing we can gain from school is the confidence to be oneself, knowing that which aspect of knowledge is the very one we need to obtain and build one’s own knowledge repository based on the interest of oneself.

Additionally, schooling is only one part of the lifelong education of one person. After leaving school, one should decide the area he devotes to and keep learning from the society and the life. At that time, we are the best teacher of ourselves, and the absence of confidence can just lead us to follow others steps. To learn for oneself, confidence is a very important part of self-learning.

Besides, self-confidence is of great use for one’s fellowship and career all through one’s life. No one would like those who owns no characters of himself but can just copy the styles of other person. Or the boss would courage his stuff to be confident in dealing with woks, but not those who afraid of making mistakes all day long.

To conclude, it is more important for u a teacher try to help students to gain self-confidence than to teach them specific knowledge.

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nlhust
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沙发

发表于 2009-4-9 23:41:45 |只看该作者

本帖最后由 nlhust 于 2009-4-9 23:43 编辑

Whetherit is more important for a teacher to help students gain theirself-confidence or teach them some more detailed knowledge is really adebating problem. Some people advocate the latter viewpoint whileothers do not. But (不明白为什么要用but,应该没有转折的意思，或者改用However？), in my opinion,(这个应该可以去掉，后面也说了I would more agree) I would more agree thatself-confidence should be treated more important.
( ?" _ N: a. Z# g
Tobegin with, one can not（这个在word里面显示的是语法错误。cannot） deny the fact that we are living in aninformation explosion era. When it comes to the discussion that whichknowledge the school should choose for students to learn, everyone hashis various opinions. The basic abstract theories, the appliedtechnologies, or the dubious hypothesis that might bring human beingsgreat interest is difficult for us to rank the sequence of importance.(这句话好像有点语法问题)A Chinese old proverb says that to give a man a fish and you feed himfor a day, but teach him how to fish and you feed him for a lifetime.The most significant thing we can gain from school is the confidence tobe oneself, knowing that which aspect of knowledge is the very one weneed to obtain and build one’s own knowledge repository based on theinterest of oneself.(感觉上，confidence和knowing...之间没有很明显的关系，是不是需要说明一下)% M+ t8 R5 {- N' j7 k, v; H

Additionally,schooling is only one part of the lifelong education of one person.After leaving school, one should decide the area he devotes to and keeplearning from the society and the（去掉） life. At that time, we are the bestteacher of ourselves, and the absence of confidence can just lead us tofollow others steps. To learn for oneself, confidence is a veryimportant part of self-learning.1 u) i/ v/ `+ Y; X" \
. S- ?& u( G% w3 Q- T
Besides,self-confidence is of great use for one’s fellowship and career allthrough one’s life. No one would like those who owns no characters ofhimself but can just copy（似乎这里就直接用just copies感觉会好些） the styles of other person. Or the boss wouldcourage his stuff to be confident in dealing with woks, but not thosewho afraid of making mistakes all day long.% v% G; b) D2 ? v+ ~/ \& n
$ ]7 |0 V# p+ C7 m
2 T' ?, L$ ]1 E
To conclude, it is more important for u a teacher try to help students to gain self-confidence than to teach them specific knowledge.

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nlhust
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板凳

发表于 2009-4-10 16:18:10 |只看该作者

很抱歉现在把作文才发上来
麻烦帮忙改改啦
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-940359-1-1.html

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gaoxchun
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地板

发表于 2009-4-10 20:12:02 |只看该作者

不好意思，前两天有点忙，我过一会就帮你改

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gaoxchun
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5楼

发表于 2009-4-10 21:33:34 |只看该作者

Whether it is more important for a teacher to help students gain their self-confidence or teach them some more detailed knowledge is really a debating(不知道debating 这个用法好不好，disputable怎么样) problem. （是否写成It is really a xxx xxx whether xxx更好）Some people advocate the latter viewpoint while others do not. But, in my opinion, I would more agree that self-confidence should be treated more important（important 是ADJ，be treated as more important one如何）.
To begin with, one can not deny the fact that we are living in an information explosion era. When it comes to the discussion that which knowledge （which kind of knowledge如何）the school should choose for students to learn, everyone has his various opinions.（has various opinions of his own如何，这里是强调个体差异） The basic abstract theories, the applied technologies, or the dubious hypothesis that might bring human beings great interest is difficult for us to rank the sequence of importance. A Chinese old proverb says that to give a man a fish and you feed him for a day, but teach him how to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. The most significant thing we can gain from school is the confidence to be oneself, knowing that which aspect of knowledge is the very one we need to obtain and build one’s own knowledge repository based on the interest of oneself.（是否想表达有了信心就能很好的学习各种知识，为何后面又写依照自己的兴趣建立自己的知识库，感觉有点偏了）
Additionally, schooling is only one part of the lifelong education of one person. After leaving school, one should decide the area（exact field如何） he devotes to and keep learning from the society and the life. At that time, we are the best teacher of ourselves, and the absence of confidence can just lead us to follow others steps. To learn for oneself(with one’s own如何), confidence is a very important part of self-learning.
Besides, self-confidence is of great use for one’s fellowship and career all through one’s life. No one would like those who owns no characters of himself but can just copy the styles of other person. Or the boss would courage his stuff to be confident in dealing with woks, but not those who afraid of making mistakes all day long.
To conclude, it is more important for u a teacher try to help students to gain self-confidence than to teach them specific knowledge.

第一次修改他人作文，意见仅供参考，不足之处请指出。
2，3段都是写自信对于学习很有帮助，感觉有点相近。是否可以何为一段，在最后一段之前插一段让步，表明专业知识也不可或缺，最后再次表明观点，自信更重要。
在用词方面，例如important ,discussion之类的，是否可以考虑找一些更华丽的词代替？

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