寄托天下
查看: 1082|回复: 4
打印 上一主题 下一主题

[活动] TOEFL 4—6月-Dark_Tournament小组 nlhust 第19次作业 [复制链接]

Rank: 4

声望
67
寄托币
1657
注册时间
2007-9-24
精华
1
帖子
88

AW小组活动奖

跳转到指定楼层
楼主
发表于 2009-4-10 16:16:03 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
本帖最后由 nlhust 于 2009-6-11 19:38 编辑

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important for u a teacher try to help students to gain self-confidence than to teach them specific knowledge. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.) K/ K9 r, |' t



Being regarded as spiritual guides, teachers should be responsible for shaping the students' characteristics, rather than teaching them specific knowledge. Accordingly, it is no doubt teachers' responsibility to build up students' belief in themselves, sinceself-confidence is always regarded as a most important personality.


Having confidence in themselves, studentsare able to do better with their major subjects. It is a fact that only whenthey believe they can perform well, dare students to take part in the classroomactivity, which is designed to help them reinforce their own knowledge in acertain subject. Also, students who have confidence in their capabilities aremore willing to studying and thus learn more and better than others. Therefore,besides teaching specific knowledge, a good teacher should instill students in beliefof themselves. That is why teachers, especially those in primary school, arestrongly recommended to encourage students and make them feel confident even asthey make only a little progress.


Moreover, as students grow into workingadults, self-confidence serves them well in their jobs and careers. At theworkplace, this quality manifests itself in a person's ability to communicate,negotiate, get on with the colleagues, and deal with the job. It enable you tokeep calm, have complete confidence in yourself and make the right decisionwhen facing difficulties so that you can convince others of your capability totackle even prickly problems and thus win their trust. To some degree, we couldeven attribute our success in career to self-confidence.


In conclusion, a quality of self-confidenceplay a significant role in both students' studying and working career. And itseems to me that this significant characteristic can be better instilled at anearly age in a classroom setting, where young students can gain theirconfidence as they interact with their peers without worrying about any seriousconsequence. Thus, in contrast to only teaching specific knowledge, it is moreimportant for teachers to help students gain self-confidence step by step.
0 0

使用道具 举报

Rank: 3Rank: 3

声望
0
寄托币
241
注册时间
2007-9-23
精华
0
帖子
4
沙发
发表于 2009-4-10 20:10:56 |只看该作者
不好意思,前两天有点忙,我过一会就帮你改

使用道具 举报

Rank: 3Rank: 3

声望
0
寄托币
241
注册时间
2007-9-23
精华
0
帖子
4
板凳
发表于 2009-4-10 21:50:48 |只看该作者
Being regarded as spiritual guides, teachers should be responsible for shaping the students' characteristics, rather than teaching them specific knowledge. Accordingly, it is no doubt teachers' responsibility to build up students' belief in themselves, since self-confidence is always regarded as a most important personality.(语法似乎不对,改成it is no doubt that teachers have responsibilities to xxxx如何)
Having confidence in themselves, students are able to do better with their major subjects. It is a fact that only when they(students) believethat they can perform well, dare students(they) to take part in the classroom activity, which is designed to help them reinforce their own knowledge in a certain subject. Also, students who have confidence in their capabilities are more willing to studying and thus learn more and better than others. Therefore, besides teaching specific knowledge, a good teacher should instill students in belief of themselves. That is why teachers, especially those in primary school, are strongly recommended(改成要求是否更妥) to encourage students and make them feel confident even as they make only a little progress.
Moreover, as students grow into working adults, self-confidence serves them well in their jobs and careers. At the work place, this quality manifests itself in a person's ability to communicate, negotiate, get on with the colleagues, and deal with the job. It enable youthem to keep calm, have complete confidence in yourself and make the right decision when facing difficulties so that you can convince others of your capability to tackle even prickly problems and thus win their trust. (句首有点问题,自信让你保持冷静,让你有完全的自信XXXX,自信让你有完全的自信?)To some degreeto some extend, we could even attribute our success in career to self-confidence.
In conclusion, a quality of(有必要吗) self-confidence plays a significant role in both students' studying and working career. And it seems to me that this significant characteristic can be better instilled at an early age in a classroom setting, where young students can gain their confidence as they interact with their peers without worrying about any serious consequence. Thus, in contrast to only teaching specific knowledge, it is more important for teachers to help students gain self-confidence step by step.


第一次批改,仅供参考,不足之处请指出。
感觉THUS有点多,是否考虑做些变换

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
0
寄托币
130
注册时间
2008-1-31
精华
0
帖子
0
地板
发表于 2009-4-11 19:53:30 |只看该作者
Being regarded as spiritual guides, teachers should be responsible for shaping the students' characteristics, rather than teaching them specific knowledge. Accordingly(前后没有因果关系啊), it is no doubt teachers' responsibility to build up students' belief in themselves, sinceself-confidence is always regarded as a most important personality.(注意连词的使用,accordingly和since放在一起也不合适)

Having confidence in themselves, studentsare able to do better with their major subjects.(分论点一) It is a fact that only whenthey believe they can perform well, dare students to take part in the classroomactivity, which is designed to help them reinforce their own knowledge in acertain subject. Also, students who have confidence in their capabilities aremore willing to studying(study) and thus learn more and better than others. Therefore,besides teaching specific knowledge, a good teacher should instill students in beliefof themselves. That is why teachers, especially those in primary school, arestrongly recommended to encourage students and make them feel confident even asthey make only a little progress.

Moreover, as students grow into workingadults, self-confidence serves them well in their jobs and careers.(分论点二) At theworkplace, this quality manifests itself in a person's ability to communicate,negotiate, get on with the colleagues, and deal with the job. It enables you tokeep calm, have complete confidence in yourself and make the right decisionwhen facing difficulties so that you can convince others of your capability totackle even(even用得很多,删掉吧) prickly problems and thus win their trust. To some degree, we couldeven attribute our success in career to self-confidence.

In conclusion, a quality of self-confidenceplay a significant role in both students' studying and working career. And itseems to me that this significant characteristic(这是动词形式,应用character) can be better instilled at anearly age in a classroom setting, where young students can gain theirconfidence as they interact with their peers without worrying about any seriousconsequence. Thus, in contrast to only teaching specific knowledge, it is moreimportant for teachers to help students gain self-confidence step by step.

很多词连在一起了,我用红笔标了出来,是因为编辑的错误么?连词的使用需要注意以下,有时句头一个“因此”,后面又跟上一个“由于”,会让读者分不清前面的因此源于何处。然后例子不错,呵呵,继续加油。

使用道具 举报

Rank: 2

声望
0
寄托币
130
注册时间
2008-1-31
精华
0
帖子
0
5
发表于 2009-4-11 19:57:49 |只看该作者
刚回去看了一下自己的作文,连起来确实是编辑的问题......

使用道具 举报

RE: TOEFL 4—6月-Dark_Tournament小组 nlhust 第19次作业 [修改]

问答
Offer
投票
面经
最新
精华
转发
转发该帖子
TOEFL 4—6月-Dark_Tournament小组 nlhust 第19次作业
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-940359-1-1.html
复制链接
发送
回顶部