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本帖最后由 追忆2009 于 2009-6-3 14:39 编辑
麦子改:
虽然和SILE同学换了一下改得顺序,但既然改完就不要浪费!
Many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them. The government of countries in which these languages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct.
第一段比较简洁,观点明确
Is it the responsible for government to act the main role to prevent the languages from being extinct (extinction?), as the speaker asserted? It is true that languages are in danger of extinction from people’s daily life, for fewer and fewer people to use it. I agree with the former one(former one 比较唐突,因为前面并没说什么是前什么是后) that lesser-kwon languages are being lost as for(这两个词为什么可以这么用?分别表示什么?这是我问的一个问题,不是修改,感觉没错但我不太明白) seldom using it.
这段说得有些内容似乎与第一段有所重复,比如说因为说的人少了,许多语言正渐渐消失。
First of all, language is the unique(the+unique表示名词我不确定可不可以,感觉别扭) to present the culture. Different region with various languages bring about the distinctive respective aspects including custom, convention, and (加the?)way of life. Those are all legacy, as beginning of language to shape their own(不明白?) handed down by ancestors. Consequently, the more languages are not used, the more distinctive cultures are lag behind ours(有点费解,凭什么这么说呢?) .(另外,the more…not…有点别扭,可以用the less) Similarly, some custom or convention start from at the beginning for people to participate in those activity(什么activity,those指那些?好像没说清,也有可能我没看懂哈). As the development of science and technology, people are trying to pursuit the prevailing culture is so-called fashion, in the respect of language, due to the main languages was spoken as the international language, English or French. but forgetting some language from small country which is regarded as useless or out of date(不确定day是否可以). The trend of culture is always dominating by follow people .we can see for the language major in university. Approximately 80 percent of student choose English as their own major, on contrary,some languages for small country such as Arabic few student study. Going after the trend of growing society ,student choose English as their major concerning about there is more opportunity to find a job after their graduated .(这段的后面这一部分关于为什么英法语开始盛行,似乎与该段主题language is the unique to present the culture有所偏差,后半部分应令起一段)
Farther more, there is another(何来另一个?上一段中心不是the unique to present the culture?所以上段后半部最好再起一段,不然这就混乱了) factor to explain why lesser-known languages are being lost. As the foregoing mentioned that people pursuit the prevailing culture and become more pragmatic to bring their own interest. However, due to the different the language are spoken by different people, and the migration is to blend and max of culture .the most important of all, with the globalization between each country. Therefore, people have to turn to more widely used language putting aside their own dialect. To use the main language to communicate with foreigner for making them to be better accepted by the society. There is language inherent factor be survival and other was obsolete. It is the role fits are survive in the end.
该段分析语言为什么会消失比较清楚,有理。
Admittedly, it is a vital resource to prevent the language being lost by government and take some affirmative measures into practice to adverse this situation. It is easy for government to offer sufficient financial support and manpower to make record and study of the losing languages when language is on the brink of extinction. The economic and political of language barriers outweigh the benefits of preserving a dying language, for government should take all-round consideration into economy and policy to bring back benefit. Should government spent a sum of money to prevent the language while shifting their responsibility, that is-- to improve the well-being of people and the pressing social problem
粉清晰有理
To sum up ,preventing the language from extinction is a pride of task to reserve the heirloom and legacy not only to enrich harmonious culture ,but also to preserve certain idea that only some languages properly convey, nevertheless .government should devote its time and resources elsewhere, and leave it the people themselves to take whatever steps are needed to preserve their own distinct language. Only them understand the their language for sharing same culture know how to make a method to develop language.
楼主的文章对我来说已经很好啦~希望我也能早点写成这样。
我实在是水平有限,所以改得可能有很多错误或不恰当
的地方,原谅!另外,要是改得不对或有什么问题的地方,Q我哈,这样我也能再提高下,谢谢啦~
还有,楼主的拼写错误是在是有点多,建议下次写完先word下~ |
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