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[活动] 8月作文冲刺小组,第3词作业 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-7-23 21:49:54 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

topic:

What do you want most in a friend — someone who is intelligent, or someone who has a sense of humor, or someone who is reliable? Which one of these characteristics is most important to you? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your choice.

When it comes to the controversial issue that "what kinds of friends do you like most?"Different people hold different opinions. Each one has their own personality and experience. We could not make a easy judgement on them. Therefore,as far as I am concerned, my good friend should be humorous and reliable.

To begin with.In my view,close friend should be a person who have the same hobby as you and also share a similar experience with you. We all will encounter with difficulties in the process of our growing.close friend can show you a better solution
to the
problems and give you encouragment.For myself ,I am not a strict person.I like joking with my friends and tell some funny stories because it can provide me a completely relaxation both psycholocally and physically.Take my good friend, Lee, as example.We have the same hobby.That is watching the comedy which can give us aamusement without thinking too much. He always encourage me and tell some humors stories when I am in depression .I need his comfort when I get frustrated.

In addtition,trusting and understanding each other attach importance to the friendship.The constructure of the friendship is just the same as that of the skycraper.Using this way, we should acknowledge that trust is the most significant part of the building, the foundation .If the friends do not trust each other , there will be an end to their friendship.In our real life, numbers of tiny things can lead our friendship to a ending. Such as
borrowing money from your friend or questioning about the ways your friend deal with things.However, they are also the methods which can test whether
it is worthy for your to continue this frindship.Trust others before being trusted.I intend to trust my friend because we are friends.

In brief, From my point of view,Being humorous and relianable is important in the communication between friends, it is also give mecourage especially when I am trapped into a tough situation. These two characters are necessary while I am choosing my friends.

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发表于 2009-7-24 11:58:46 |只看该作者
When it comes to the controversial issue that "what kinds of friends do you like most?"(这句话貌似不完全哦,呵呵,把后面两句话合在一起吧) Different people hold different opinions. Each one has their own personality and experience. We could not make a easy judgement(judgment) on them. Therefore, as far as I am concerned, my good friend should be humorous and reliable.

为了使文章段落更有逻辑,我觉得在Each one has their own personality and experience前加个because: When it comes to the controversial issue that what kinds of friends do you like most, different people hold different opinions because each one has their own personality and experience.

To begin with.(应该是,) In my view, close friend(s) should be a person who have(has) the same hobby as you and also share(s) a similar experience with you. We all will encounter with difficulties in the process of our growing(growth). close(Close) friend(s 一定要复数不然前面要加冠词) can show you a better solution to the problems and give you encouragment(encouragement). For myself, I am not a strict person. I like joking with my friends and tell some funny stories because it can provide me a completely relaxation both psycholocally and physically. Take my good friend, Lee, as example. We have the same hobby. That is watching the comedy which can give us aamusement without thinking too much. He always encourage me and tell some humors stories when I am in depression .I need his comfort when I get frustrated.

这段我就先不该错单词了,close friends can show you a better solution to the problems and give you encouragement 然而你后面却又举了个例子说你和你的朋友Lee能谈到一起是因为你们都喜欢开玩笑。这个证明的顺序有问题。你可以在段首后面举这个例子:
To begin with, In my view, a close friend should be a person who has the same hobby as you and also shares a similar experience with you. I will take the experience of myself as an example. I am not a strict person, so I like joking with my friends and telling some funny stories because it can provide me a completely relaxation both psycholocally and physically; while my friend Lee, has the same hobby with me. As a result, we became good friends and usually watch comedies which can give us amusement without thinking carefully. What is more, close friends can show you a better solution to problems and give you encouragement. When I am in depression, Lee always encourages me and tells some humors stories and I really need his comfort when I get frustrated.

In addtition(addition), trusting and understanding each other attach importance to the friendship. The constructure(establishment) of the friendship is just the same as that of the skyscraper. Using this way(In this way), we should acknowledge that trust is the most significant part of the building, the foundation. If the(去掉) friends do not trust each other , there will be an end to their friendship. In our real life, numbers of (numerous)tiny things can lead our friendship to a ending(end). Such as borrowing money from your friend or questioning about the ways your friend deal with things. However, they are also the methods which can test whether. It is worthy for your to continue this frindship(friendship). Trust others before being trusted. I intend to trust my friend because we are friends.

举的例子不是很深刻,最后一句I intend to trust my friend because we are friends.显得和前面没什么联系,最后一句不如改成:Trust others before being trusted, if you want to make true friends.


In brief, From my point of view, being humorous and relianable(realiable) is important in the communication between friends, it is also give mecourage(encouragement) especially when I am trapped into a tough situation. These two characters are necessary while I am choosing my friends.

论据到时挺充分的,下次把结构组织好就行了。貌似没有跑题啊,呵呵。还有这个头像

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板凳
发表于 2009-7-24 13:00:47 |只看该作者
谢谢大神赐教,感激不尽啊。
楼主写作水平很好,一直没练过写作,逻辑很乱,容易颠三倒四。
感觉写作这东西很难短时间练上去,脑子里的东西已经成型了。

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地板
发表于 2009-7-24 18:27:43 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 wawabj 于 2009-7-24 18:31 编辑

When it comes to the controversial issue你的标志性语句 that "what kind of friends do you like most?"Different people hold different opinions. Each one has their own personality and experience. We could not make a easy judgement on them. 这句话在这的意义我没有理解到Therefore,as far as I am concerned, my good friend should be humorous and reliable.原来你要的是两者兼备。。。



To begin with.In my view,close friend should be a person who have the same hobby as you and also share a similar experience with you. We all will encounter with difficulties in the process of our growing.close friend can show you a better solution0 M; q-bto the problems and give you encouragment.For myself ,I am not a strict person.I like joking with my friends and tell some funny stories because it can provide me a completely relaxation both psycholocally and physically.Take my good friend, Lee, as example.We have the same hobby.That is watching the comedy which can give us aamusement without thinking too much. He always encourage me and tell some humors stories when I am in depression .I need his comfort when I get frustrated.



In addtition,trusting and understanding each other attach importance to the friendship.The constructure of the friendship is just the same as that of the skycraper.Using this way, we should acknowledge that trust is the most significant part of the building, the foundation.和上一段会不会有点冲突If the friends do not trust each other , there will be an end to their friendship.In our real life, numbers of tiny things can lead our friendship to a ending. Such as borrowing money from your friend or questioning about the ways your friend deal with things.However, they are also the methods which can test whether it is worthy for your to continue this frindship.Trust others before being trusted.I intend to trust my friend because we are friends.



In brief, From my point of view,Being humorous and relianable is important in the communication between friends, it is also give me courage especially when I am trapped into a tough situation. These two characters are necessary while I am choosing my friends.

看了你的文章之后 颠覆了我对题目的理解呀,到底是二选一还是非黑即白呀?

非常的困惑,而且我也很容易偏题,谁能给我明道阿!!

绿坝小姐,你加下我QQ,我们有个essay的小组,我把你加进去吧!注意查收短消息!

If you don't try,light won't hit your eyes.

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