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Contemporary society with tremendous technological changes, updating knowledge explosion, vast accumulation of data from all fields, people are demanded for further study all the time. We now experience an education-oriented society, so some people insist that only the education that specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each students [student] will be effective. I cannot agree with this opinion exactly [exactly太过强硬]. In my point of view, specifically designed education do us good, but it doesn’t mean that we could overemphasize on it. We should analyze this subject in dialectic manners.观点提得很好
Specifically designed education, which takes advantage of students’ interests, can help students get twice the result with half the effort. An effective learning method is a key to large mass of knowledge. Since each person has his [or her] own characteristic such as good memory, excellent logic, good sense of mathematic and so on [such as与so on不能搭配使用]. According to these characteristics, an effective education helps them to realize that learning is a piece of cake rather than a headache. As we all know that Albert Einstein was once a disabled in school study, but his mother took him back, taught herself and let him do what he had interest----hatch eggs [是Einstein孵鸡蛋吗?记忆中好像是Edison,我也搞不太清了,只记得Einstein是受过高等教育的]. It is another new way for him to learn---observe the phenomena he was curious about and found out the [删] answers himself. In that way, he became one of the greatest scientists in the world and later [使用later on可能更好些] he showed us a brand new world. Obviously, a suitable training plays an important role in education, which broadens the horizon of students and helps them to find what fits them best. There is an old saying ” If you cannot have the best, make the best of what you have.”
In reference to the benefits of designed education, we should also pay attention that such education may encourage students to focus on the fields that they have interests. [首句比较长,但是没有切中要害] In that case, we will find a great knowledge gap between what they like and what they do not. What is serious is they do not have even the basic knowledge about the field they dislike. With the development of technology, different subjects connect with each other closer than ever before, a wider background of knowledge is a necessary demand for every competitor. Generalists are the better choice of present--day society. For instance, a teacher should have not only skills of education, but also some knowledge of psychology.这段的说理还是比较好的,如果能再深入一点就更好了^_^但是TS的提出不明确,需要改进;另外,这段应该开始引出general education了,因为下一段不是准备论述统一教育了吗?个人认为把generalists这一句稍作改动,引入统一教育,对于全文的起承转合是有积极作用的~~
If we turn our focus to the reality of career, since even the intelligent students, it is not possible for all of them to arrive at the top training establishment----definitely suitable education for their own interests and needs, it might perhaps be wise to advice students on how to make the best out of limited circumstances. It is also a good way for students to learn to accumulate knowledge they need most from the vast sea of it. The earnest they did, the longest they will keep these in their mind and in the process of filtering all kinds of knowledge, it is great treasure in all of their lives.没看到统一教育之类的词:confused:,其实在上一段已经有一个引子的情况下,这一段是可以写得很好的,可是,这里有点乱;不过词语用的是很赞!
Overall, after taking some aspects into consideration, to [删] nowadays, specifically designed education which meets the needs and interests of students does good for absorbing knowledge on the basis of individual differences, but concentrating all on it will work on the contrary. We should find the balance between these two points and get access to the more effective education.
同意zehua的意见,第三段把全文的层次打乱了,或许是限时使得很多想法没有办法在规定时间内展开吧~~
个人意见,可以在B1先提出统一教育,提出其好处;B2还是按照原来的写; 到B3再让步写特殊教育的好处,这样条理可能会清晰些~~
全文的用词真的是很好,到处都有亮点,加油加油:) |
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