高频 Argument 45 不奢求拍 但求存档

问啊问啊UID: 2519774

A.45
The following appeared as an editorial in a wildlife journal.

"Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic region. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of a year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed, and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the decline in arctic deer populations is the result of deer being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea."

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In the editorial argument, the author asserts the reason of the decline of the arctic deer populations with reports from local hunters. Yet careful scrutiny of the evidences reveals that it accomplishes little toward the conclusion. These logically unconvincing respects will be illustrated below.

The most significant evidence the author considered is reports from local hunters. However, the report fails to render sufficient convincing backgrounds which can help to analyze the reality. There is no specific data about the proportion of reported hunters between hunters who do not report. Therefore maybe the number of reported hunters is so few that they are unable to see arctic deer. Or, maybe the areas those hunters traced are just lacking arctic deer. Even there is another possible that arctic deer have already migrated in that the time of the reports has not been provided. In other words, these arctic deer may change the migration time recently so hunters may hunt in a wrong time.

Even assuming the reports from the hunters are totally correct, credibility of the reports about global warming trends and feasibility of the conclusion is open to doubt. As no further evidence of the report is offered, we are unable to gain any information about districts sea ice melted and how much the sea ice melted. Lacking of these clear details, we are wholly unpersuaded and may consider the possibility that sea ice around Canada's arctic region have not melted so that it can still support the arctic deer continuing migration. It is also entirely possible that sea ice in those region have melted, yet the degree of the melt is not so deep that arctic deer are still be able to migrate across the frozen sea.

Granted that these testimonies well convinced us, the conclusion is still too hasty to persuade us. Through the description of the argument, "Since..., we can conclude...", we acquire that the author ascribes the decline to the only factor of the melt of sea ice detached the way arctic migrating across. However, it is unsustained whether there exist other possible ingredients. For instance, recently, whether hunters are hunting unduly? Whether the number of the predators preying arctic deer is increasing? Whether the food of the arctic deer is decreasing? Without declaration of these significant phenomenons invested in the local area, any hasty conclusion will be out of compelling.

To sum up, two evidences of the argument are used improperly. To strengthen the argument, more details should be added. The hasty conclusion is so unsafe that only several clues which sometimes correlated with each other forming an organic whole can it turns to safe.

happy牧羊UID: 2662770

不奢求拍~~  喵~~你这不是打消我改作文的积极性咩~~   呵呵 具体内容看等会跟帖

happy牧羊UID: 2662770

请看word，总体还不错~ A45-by问啊问啊.doc (54 KB, 下载次数: 27)

2009-8-29 17:38:28 上传

下载次数: 27

问啊问啊UID: 2519774

我花了2个小时慢慢磨的
我发现我写的慢的一个原因就是，每一个表达都要查字典，看有没有除了自己熟悉的常见表达外更好的表达，因此耽误了很久
另外一个就是经常有想不出来说说很么话的时候，尤其是issue，就愣在那儿看别人的提纲，看题目发呆，就是不知道怎么接着论证

ps：楼上的修改真的很用心啊，最后还给出同主题地址，超贴心的感觉，谢谢了，后天考了，高频还没覆盖几篇呢，赶紧去了