习作ISSUE207 球拍~~

漏雨的房子UID: 2300802

欢迎大家狠拍，谢谢！
ISSUE 207"Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."


Rituals and ceremonies have somewhat coherent relation to the culture that they belonged. But which sort of this relation is? The answer is definition. It is estimated that how many cultures there were on this planet determined how many different ritual or ceremony kinds correspondingly at least. Furthermore, rituals and ceremonies help define a culture in the eyes of anthropologists, for when researchers need to study one culture, they usually start a research by collecting detailed arrangement and people’s behaviors on these events.

Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture by identifying people’s identity. No matter which appearance a wedding ceremony has, reshaping the family relationship along with a new marriage and advocating to the public is the primary goal. During these, each people under certain culture find themselves a new family role or even a new social status, which belong to this culture executively. These activities are unique, so these rituals and ceremonies can perfectly tell one culture’s personality.

Whenever people hold rituals, they put cultural philosophy into the procedures, so that their culture can handed down smoothly and thoroughly to the next generation. So does the ceremonies.
Young people follow some orders and learn their racial culture from these, such as, how to allocate resources in a family, what is the right method raising your children, and even what is the meaning of life, etc. The essential part of certain culture would be remembered by off springs.

Although rituals or ceremonies boast different meaning and appearance, they are people-crowed events, thus communication with members is the same point. People who share one culture greet with each other, come out their thoughts and finally reach to agreement of something.

In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies can help to define a culture in many aspects. Culture will also flourish by these ‘definition’.

漏雨的房子UID: 2300802

没人拍拍~自己顶一下

erikxtUID: 2485344

好像原来改过同题文，我试着给你看看哈～～

erikxtUID: 2485344

我怀着谦卑的心情从太傻搬过来，但lz的文章让我有点愤懑。
ISSUE 207"Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are."


Rituals and ceremonies have somewhat coherent relation to the culture that they belonged. But which sort of this relation is? The answer is definition. It is estimated that how many cultures there were on this planet determined how many different ritual or ceremony kinds correspondingly at least. （预计 多少种文化相应地决定了多少不同的仪式at least）Furthermore, rituals and ceremonies help define a culture in the eyes of anthropologists, for when researchers need to study one culture, they usually start a research by collecting （data such as）detailed arrangement and people’s behaviors on these events.

Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture by identifying people’s identity. No matter which appearance a wedding ceremony has, reshaping the family relationship along with a new marriage and advocating to the public is the primary goal. During these, each people under certain culture find themselves (himself or herself) a new family role or even a new social status, which belong to this culture executively. These activities are unique, so these rituals and ceremonies can perfectly tell one culture’s personality. （没有论证，例子貌似不能支撑论点）

Whenever people hold rituals, they put cultural philosophy into the procedures, so that their culture can handed down smoothly and thoroughly to the next generation. So does the ceremonies.（这段说可继承性）
Young people follow some orders and learn their racial culture from these, such as, how to allocate resources in a family, what is the right method raising your children, and even what is the meaning of life, etc. The essential part of certain culture would be remembered by off springs. Off-spring

Although rituals or ceremonies boast (自夸) different meaning and appearance, they are people-crowed events, thus communication with members is the same point. People who share one culture greet with each other, come out their thoughts and finally reach to agreement of something. 你这是在想表达什么？

In conclusion, rituals and ceremonies can help to define a culture in many aspects. Culture will also flourish by these ‘definition’. 这个结语没什么作用。而且明显的离题了。

你的issue貌似只是谈论Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture.把后面的社会归属感部分（Without them, societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who they are.）放哪里了？基本上只有叙述，论证手段单一且weak。文章各段之间缺乏显式的逻辑性，部分句子故作高深，但这不是写chinglish的地方。希望你现阶段多看看同题文找到行文思路，注意审题。我快一年没写issue了，标出了一些我可以几乎可以认定的表达错，但让我感到费解的地方比我标记的要多噢！！

漏雨的房子UID: 2300802

非常感谢！很需要这样的意见，我会认真参考的！

我晚上再仔细看细节上的问题
感谢erikxt
那个~我这个不代表gt的整体水平。。。汗一个。。。