@@茶叶蛋炒饭@@ 第六次作业 issue7 请组员跟帖

saybia1993UID: 2625112

bian ji

鱼晒月亮UID: 2723622

临暄的作业，重新写了下，请求再次改正。跑题没有？！The video camera has more merits except providing such accurate and convincing records of contemporary life than written records: firstly, it is convenient to carry it with us. Wherever and whenever possibly we want to record something, and then we could do it; secondly, the video camera reflect intuitive feeling through sound and pictures, and written records could not do the same function, even if limning the objectives in the most apt and magnificent language; thirdly, the video camera could be zoomed in and out easily, and it is well-suited for old people and those people have bad eye-sight especially; last but not the least, just by “copy and paste”, we could preserve the audio files recorded through the video camera easily and conveniently only when someone intends to destroy them. On the contrary, written records would be destroyed easily because of different causes, such as fire, decay, etc and disappeared forever regretfully. For instance, Carlyle’s original manuscript- French Revolution had disappeared forever because the servant of Carlyle’s friend who put the manuscript into fire. And another example is that after Richard Burton died, his wife was against his will and destroyed the book which he finished in ten years. More importantly, using the video camera would decrease the usage of papers and is beneficial to environment.
As above mentioned, perhaps one should buy one video camera without doubt and assumes simply the video camera has become more important than written records. However, the shortcoming could not be trivialized is that the video camera can not record what we thought, and what it does is to record passively what we do and see or social phenomena, natural scenery etc. Thus, at some times, even if the video camera records such accurate and convincing contemporary life, it can not reflect our authentic feeling and ideas or essence of the objectives. It is true especially for precise work such scientific research and literature. Another characteristic is that only minority of people could use the video camera compared to written records. However, reading books, writing records as convention for thousand years has become accustomed to everyone. It is impractical and unrealistic to change it. Not to mention that the video camera can not does the same function as written records, such as for appreciation of arts, academic thesis etc, and the video camera provides less imagination than written records to some extent.
To sum up, the video camera and written records all are the product of scientific and technological development, have its own merits and shortcomings. To some extent, to judge which on is more important is meaningless, only choosing that is most apt for us and could records our true feeling or ideas are more important.

mikestoneUID: 2734495

7、"The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."

My view to the issue is that video camera and written records have their own features. Although video camera can provide an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life, we cannot say that it is more important than written records as a form of documentation.

Surely, the video camera has become one of the most important forms of documentation. Just as the speaker says, it can provide such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. More precisely, we can substantiate this view by following aspects. First of all, using cameras, one can take pictures and videos of daily life and some experience which are worth to be collected. For instance, when traveling in Paris, almost every tourist takes photos of Eiffel Tower, because it is a famous and interesting place, and will become an unforgettable experience in their whole life. Moreover, we can obtain accurate and convincing evidences for things like the cases and propositions by cameras. It is well known that in a court, videos and pictures of crime scene are persuasive evidences, based on which we can punish those criminals. Similarly, science researches also need evidences. One hundred years ago, chemists proved their results by describing or repeating their experiments; however, nowadays, papers are attached by photos and videos, from which we can judge whether they obtain new materials from the chemical reactions. Without video cameras, we may hardly image what President Obama looks like, News may be boring, so video camera, no doubt, has become a significant form of documentation.

However, written records are still a fundamental form of documentation, of which the importance can not be replaced. There are several reasons. First, the video camera can not record people’s attitude and soul. For example, we can take photos of Eiffel Tower; however can we record our adoration to it just by these pictures? Similarly, things like courage, character of a person, and mood can not be preserved by cameras. Second, the video camera can hardly record meaning, essential and usage of one thing. Take science research as an example. We can obtain some videos of a chemical reaction; however, we don’t know why the reaction happens just by these videos. Yet, meaning of this reaction is unknown. So, without written records, how can we preserve these stuffs? Furthermore, things like batteries, computers and printers all limit the use of cameras, whereas it is more convenient to use paper records. Therefore, we cannot say that the video camera is more important that written records.

Actually, if written records and video cameras are used together, it must be more effective, because the disadvantages of them can be avoided. For instance, our textbooks include explanations, graphs and pictures, which make the knowledge easy to be understood. Materials for papers and cases contain photos as well as illustrations; then, they will be more convincing. There are videos, picture and comments in some piece of news; and by these elements, the news are more interesting.

In sum, even the video camera has some many advantages and become widely used in our society; we cannot conclude that it is more important than written records. Actually, it is more effective if we use both of them.

改临暄的作业(我把附件传上去了，这里面没有颜色)

开始是不是没有把开头复制过来啊？
The video camera has more merits except providing such accurate and convincing records of contemporary life than written records:
firstly, it is convenient to carry it with us. Wherever and whenever possibly we want to record something, and then we could do it; secondly, the video camera reflect intuitive feeling through sound and pictures, and written records could not do the same function, even if limning the objectives in the most apt and magnificent language; thirdly, the video camera could be zoomed in and out easily, and it is well-suited for old people and those people have bad eye-sight especially; last but not the least, just by “copy and paste”, we could preserve the audio files recorded through the video camera easily and conveniently only when someone intends to destroy them. On the contrary, written records would be destroyed easily because of different causes, such as fire, decay, etc and disappeared forever regretfully. For instance, Carlyle’s original manuscript- French Revolution had disappeared forever because the servant of Carlyle’s friend who put the manuscript into fire. And another example is that after Richard Burton died, his wife was against his will and destroyed the book which he finished in ten years. More importantly, using the video camera would decrease the usage of papers and is beneficial to environment.
这段大部分都在说理，蓝色的是你的总论点，绿色的部分都是你的观点，适当的再掺进点例子，效果会更好。
这段还有一个缺点，就是本来你可以分两方面说的，但是因为你没有加入引导性的句子，很容易让人感觉你的思路也乱成一锅粥。你看看是不是分成video camera的优点，written records的缺点来说。
总体来说思路很不错。
As above mentioned, perhaps one should buy one video camera without doubt and assumes simply the video camera has become more important than written records. However, the shortcoming could not be trivialized is that the video camera can not record what we thought, and what it does is to record passively what we do and see or social phenomena, natural scenery etc. Thus, at some times, even if the video camera records such accurate and convincing contemporary life, it can not reflect our authentic feeling and ideas or essence of the objectives. It is true especially for precise work such scientific research and literature. Another characteristic is that only minority of people could use the video camera compared to written records. However, reading books, writing records as convention for thousand years has become accustomed to everyone. It is impractical and unrealistic to change it. Not to mention that the video camera can not does the same function as written records, such as for appreciation of arts, academic thesis etc, and the video camera provides less imagination than written records to some extent.


这段的观点也不错，你的语言挺地道的，很少看到中化的英语，学习了。

To sum up, the video camera and written records all are the product of scientific and technological development, have its own merits and shortcomings. To some extent, to judge which on is more important is meaningless, only choosing that is most apt for us and could records our true feeling or ideas are more important.

结尾简洁而明快，相当不错。

总结，这篇文章总体是很不错的，值得我学习的地方很多。

改蚂蚁
by 懒蚂蚁
【7】.
The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records.

There is a hot discussion about which is more important in documenting our contemporary life between video records and written records nowadays. In my opinion, it is obvious that video records have some advantages in recording our life in some aspects. In the meantime, we should not ignore their disadvantages which make them less suitable to record other aspects of our life than written records. However, with the development of science and technology, it is very possible that video records will be much more predominant than written records in the future.
（开头提出三个总论点：1video records的优点2video records有缺点3科学的发展将会使得video records占支配地位。总之你的观点是支持了ISSUE了。头开的不错）


In the first place, there is no denying the fact that video records have some merits in recording our life, which make them more and more popular among people. On one hand, they can make an accurate record of contemporary life with sounds and motions. Before camera comes into being, it is impossible for people to remember their predecessors' faces, not to mention their voices and others aspects that can not record by written records.（这里可以举一个具体的例子的，比如我们只能看到莫扎特写的曲谱，但是不能亲耳听到他的演奏。） On the other hand, with the help of video records, we can make a thing more convincing. Since the cameras can record what we do and how we do it at an accurate time, we can utilize them to prove the innocence of a man, at the same time we can use it to convict someone of his/her offence. This is why so many cameras have been invited into public places such as big markets, airports and so forth. In a word, video records do help us a lot in our everyday life.

In the second place, it is true that there are some defects of video camera in recording our daily life. Firstly, it is too expensive and complicated to be used widely. Nowadays only a little part of people can afford a camera and only some teenagers can manipulate sophisticatedly. On the contrary, it is easy and cheap to record something happens in life by written records for the reason that what it needs are no more than a paper and a pencil. Secondly, compared to the written records, the recording time of video camera is too short. While a book can represent a history more than thousand years, it is hard for video camera to record the affairs that have occurred in several days. Lastly, at least for now, it is impossible for video camera to record our life subjectively even though they provide us with objective and accurate pictures. However, with the written records, it is simple to depict what we think in languages. So nowadays video camera can not substitute the written records. They will coexist and complement to each other for some time.

However, with the development of our society, it is possible that video camera would supersede the role of written records in the future. With the electronic technologies advancing, increasing the record volume while decreasing the size of record equipments will not be a dream anymore. It is very similar to the changing of computers from a room-size one to nowadays' portable computer. What's more, the price of camera will be decrease dramatically and the operation of them is going to become easier. Maybe in the future, with the communication between people and video records can we feel their emotions in the records. All in all, with the development of science and technology, it is not impossible for video camera to become an alternative recording method, just as recording on papers taking the place of carving on bamboos in China（这个比喻不恰当，不是同一概念的东西。）.
(这段在读的时候感觉说服力不是太强。)
To sum up, it is hard to make a comparison about who is more important between video camera and written records in contemporary society since they have isolated advantages. However, with our society advancing, more and more people with turn to video camera for recording their everyday life.

总结：文章思路清晰，语句都能比较好的表达自己的观点。中间的三段思路清晰，我已经标了颜色。如果能加一些比较具体的例子会更好吧。末二段说服力不是太强。总体来说感觉很多地方值得我学习。

yuxiang1900UID: 2558709

7、"The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."

小翔飞飞

It is tempting to agree with the speaker on the assertion that video records is a more important form to record contemporary life than written records, because of a common notion that seeing is believing. However, my life experience and actual observation also tell me that, in many circumstance, video camera is not so much more convenient than the traditional recording means-writing.

I concede that video camera provides the possibility to vividly record what is happening in front of your eyes in the form of images and voice. It is very valuable in many realms. To the policeman, a video record of the criminal process would be the most direct and convincing proof; to the historians, it is a pity that the video camera comes out too late, or they would obtain more valuable and accurate information of important history events. And in the realm of science, video camera is also a popular record tool. Almost all phenomenon observed by researchers need to be recorded by video cameras. In fact, to most of common people, video cameras have already been the mainly tools to record their daily lives, because it is indeed more timely and vivid than written records.

Yet, there are many circumstances that the video camera has little chance to work. At first, it cannot record people's consciousness. The video camera would record all the process of an event in the form of images and voice, but to record the thoughts and the emotion of people involved in the event is not within the range of its capability. In such cases, written records may be the only choice. That is also the main reason for why many people still writing diary nowadays. Second, the video of an event often needs an additional explanation since videos cannot clearly and completely tell you the causal relationship, background and significance implied in the event. It needs the assistance of written records. Third, there is not always a video camera at hand, and even if possible, you might lose the chance to record an emergency in time with it. Then, taking up your pen and describing what did happen might be a better choice. After all, not all facts can be completely recorded by video cameras, many an event can only be written down.

Moreover, video cameras are costly that not all the people can afford it. The records provided by it are also more expansive and harder to store than written records. A piece of paper, which cost you less than 1 cent, might record a whole day of yours, but when it is replace by video camera, the expense would be hard to assess.

In sum, video camera and writing have each own merits, and of course, it is unreasonable to favor one more than another. A more essential point, as far as I concerned, is how to wisely choose between them based on different situations so as to provide more accurate and convincing records of our contemporary lives.

小翔飞飞改stone

My view to the issue is that video camera and written records have their own features. Although video camera can provide an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life, we cannot say that it is more important than written records as a form of documentation.
Surely, the video camera has become one of the most important forms of documentation. Just as the speaker says, it can provide such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. More precisely, we can substantiate this view by following aspects. First of all, using cameras, one can take pictures and videos of daily life and some experience which are worth to be collected. For instance, when traveling in Paris, almost every tourist takes photos of Eiffel Tower, because it is a famous and interesting place, and will become an unforgettable experience in their whole life. Moreover, we can obtain accurate and convincing evidences for things like the cases and propositions by cameras. It is well known that in a court, videos and pictures of crime scene are persuasive evidences, based on which we can punish those criminals. Similarly, science researches also need evidences. One hundred years ago, chemists proved their results by describing or repeating their experiments; however, nowadays, papers are attached by photos and videos, from which we can judge whether they obtain new materials from the chemical reactions. Without video cameras, we may hardly image what President Obama looks like, News may be boring. (这里建议重写) So video camera, no doubt, has become a significant form of documentation.
However, written records are still a fundamental form of documentation, of which the importance can not be replaced. There are several reasons. First, the video camera can not record people’s attitude and soul. For example, we can take photos of Eiffel Tower; however can we record our adoration to it just by these pictures? Similarly, things like courage, character of a person, and mood can not be preserved by cameras. Second, the video camera can hardly record meaning, essential and usage of one thing. Take science research as an example. We can obtain some videos of a chemical reaction; however, we don’t know why the reaction happens just by these videos. Yet, meaning of this reaction is unknown. So, without written records, how can we preserve these stuffs? Furthermore, things like batteries, computers and printers all limit the use of cameras, whereas it is more convenient to use paper records. Therefore, we cannot say that the video camera is more important that written records. (问一个无关的问题：video camera好像可以记录声音的，能不能用voice替代writing？)

Actually, if written records and video cameras are used together, it must be more effective, because the disadvantages of them can be avoided. For instance, our textbooks include explanations, graphs and pictures, which make the knowledge easy to be understood. If materials for papers and cases contain photos as well as illustrations, they will be more convincing. There are videos, pictures and comments in some piece of news; and by these elements, the news are more interesting.
In sum, even the video camera has many advantages and become widely used in our society; we cannot conclude that it is more important than written records. Actually, it is more effective if we use both of them.

写得很好啊，比上次看你的那篇好太多了，你进步怎么这么快啊，太吓人！

woaicarfieldUID: 2568106

【7】 The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records. 摄像机可以通过如此精确而有力的记录手段来再现当代生活，因此它已经代替书面记录成为了一种更重要的记录手段。

BY 小爱
According to the speaker , the video camera is a more important means of documenting contemporary life and event than a written record becaude video recordings are more accurate and convincing. Although I agree with the contention insofar as a video provides a direct and accurate record of momentary aspects, it cannot record what we see and hear in life, and even the great history evev long times age. So the speaker unnecessarily overstates the comparative significance of video as a documentary tool.

To begin with, I have to admit that video camera is playing an important role in today’s life, our life has changed dramatically since the video camera came into being, which provides a totally new and different way of recording life to the traditional written methods. In daily life, men can record everything in terms of video which can make the details of our life available to the posterity. Think about it, it is impossible for anyone , no matter how keen an observer and skilled a person, to record the whole progress such as making a movie, and the outstanding open ceremony of Olympic Games. Yet these events can only documented by video cameras.

On the second place, compared with written records, video documentation is a complicated mixture of sound and image which can give us more direct information . So it is less influenced by the one who took record and the one who interprete it. On the controrary, the written record only have the words without language. Let’s take our ancestors’ life and culture for instance, we can hardly understand the written documents of our ancestor from hundreds of years ago if we have’s undergone special training, even those professionals who have learned to understand ancient literature and to transform it into forms acceptale of our contemporary culture, are not able to ensure us 100 percent sincerity to the original information our ancestor want to convey . However, when use camera video to make and show the history by some special eletronical experts ,we will be able to see a lively revival of the life period in ancient time.

However, it is rash to say that video camera can replace the traditional written documents and become the new domination of documentation field since video record has its limits in some respects. The video media is just suitalbe to record happenings rather than detailed data and information. For example, video cannot documenting the terms of a complex contract agreement, or a accurate statistics about the flying log. And the video is of little use when it comes to documenting a person’s subjective mind and impressions on something, or the personal experience of travelling somewhere. For instance, when a new construction was built, the constructor could use the video records to show people its vague structure and external image but not the clear information about the every facilities , only the written records can give people the most direct impression.

To sum up, the speaker’s conclusion overstates the importance of video records,at least to some extent. In fact, when it comes to documenting temporal, spatial events, video records are more convenient and complete. However, when it comes to some detailed information, I tend to choose written records which are needed to quantify and provide meaningful datas to our world.

It is tempting（该词是诱人的意思，为何用在此啊） to agree with the speaker on the assertion that video records is a more important form to record contemporary life than written records, because of a common notion that seeing is believing. However, my life experience and actual observation also tell me that, in many circumstance, video camera is not so much more convenient than the traditional recording means-writing.

I concede that video camera provides the possibility（提供可能性，这个说法有点牵强） to vividly record what is happening in front of your eyes in the form of images and voice. It is very valuable in many realms. To（介词用FOR） the policeman, a video record of the criminal process would be the most direct and convincing proof; to the historians, it is a pity that the video camera comes out too late, or they would obtain more valuable and accurate information of important history events. And in the realm of science, video camera is also a popular recordING tool. Almost all phenomenon observed by researchers need to be recorded by video cameras. In fact, to most of common people, video cameras have already been the mainly tools to record their daily lives, because it is indeed more timely and vivid than written records.多在句子上下功夫，

Yet, there are many circumstances that the video camera has little chance to work这句话不太地道. At first, it cannot record people's consciousness. The video camera would record all the process of an event in the form of images and voice, but to record the thoughts and the emotion of people involved in the event is not within the range of its capability. In such cases, written records may be the only choice. That is also the main reason for why(这个定语从句有问题for the reason that) many people still writing diary nowadays. Second, the video of an event often needs an additional explanation since videos cannot clearly and completely tell you the causal relationship, background and significance implied in the event. It needs the assistance of written records. Third, there is not always a video camera at（ON） hand, and even if possible, you might lose the chance to record an emergency in time with it. Then, taking up your pen and describing what did happen might be a better choice. After all, not all facts can be completely recorded by video cameras, many an event can only be written down.

Moreover, video cameras are costly that not all the people can afford it. The records provided by it are also more expansive and harder to store than written records. A piece of paper, which cost you less than 1 cent, might record a whole day of yours, but when it is replace by video camera, the expense would be hard to assess.本段讲像机的非普遍性，可以多写一点

In sum, video camera and writing have each own merits, and of course, it is unreasonable to favor one more than another. A more essential point, as far as I concerned, is how to wisely choose between them based on different situations so as to provide more accurate and convincing records of our contemporary lives结尾段要跟开头段相呼应

文章有点短，而且请多在句子上下功夫，一些句子写得很不地道，像CHINGLISH

shenxianhuUID: 2455394

by SXH

It’s tempting to agree with the speaker’s assertion that the video camera plays an important role as an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life involves objective recount details. However, the speaker extremely extends this assertion to a definite point that video camera totally overwhelms written records while ignoring written records perform better in transmitting transmit subjective emotion.

One thing I have to admit is that video camera has gradually come to our daily life since the last century. It’s adopted widely in all kinds of realms and we can’t live without it. As for the reason, compared with written records, video camera appears to be more the embodiment of objective situations. So video camera, as a powerful weapon, provides convincing evidence in laws. For example, the whole stealing process of the thief under the monitor can be totally recorded as the evidence of the lawsuit. Moreover, there is another function that camera video play as an effective tool for recording-leaving people sweet and glorious memory. Supposing the scene of a basketball game or a football game, it’s impossible for a person even a trained news reporter to recount either of them in details. Contrarily, camera video, in some extent, perfectly keep the detailed moment, which might be one of the most valuable and meaningful memory. Another apt example involves recording baby’s life. It’s believed nothing can match video which reminder a person a full memory of his naive children hood when he refer to the video which keep fragments of his baby’s time.

Having recognized that camera video has been an indispensable element as a recording style in people’s daily life, by no means can we deny that in some cases, it is pale compared with written records. As an up-to-date technological product, it is complicated for many people even the old. Contrarily, written records are adaptive to almost everyone. Meanwhile, written records obviously bring us great convenience for we are used to take it any time. However, when we refer to camera records, it’s heavier.

Even though the disadvantages of camera video records discussed above might be no longer disadvantages as the development of the technology and the society, we have to admit that written records still perform as important member of all typical records for the reason. When it comes to documenting a person’s subjective state of mind, impression or even reflections of an event, video camera is of no practical use at all. So to the extent that personal interpretation adds dimension and richness to the records, written records is actually more important than video records.

Based on above, the speaker overstates the comparative importance of video records. At least to some cases, when we refer to recalling the moment before, video records are more objective and detailed. However, what we saw through video records are just a tiny fraction of our life and time. written records are need to provide meaningful and illustrative information to the world around us.
思路不够宽，例子找不着好的
谢谢懒蚂蚁的修改

改 小爱
According to the speaker, the video camerais a more important means of documenting contemporary life and event than awritten record because video recordings are moreaccurate and convincing. Although I agree with the contention(同意speaker的观点，何来争论，建议改成assertion) insofar as a videoprovides a direct and accurate record of momentary aspects, it cannot recordwhat we see and hear in life, and even the great history ever long times age. So the speaker unnecessarilyoverstates the comparative significance of video as a documentary tool.

To begin with, I have to admit that video camera is playing an important rolein today’s life. Our life has changeddramatically since the video camera came into being, which provides a totallynew and different way of recording life contrarily tothe traditional written methods. In daily life, men can record everything interms of video which can be preserved thedetails of our life available for the posterity.(make...to...显然不对)
Think about it, it isimpossible for anyone , no matter how keen an observer and skilled a person, torecord by written records(不然不知道你在说哪种记录)the whole progress such as making amovie, and the outstanding open ceremony of Olympic Games. Yet these events canonly documented by video cameras.

On the second place, compared with written records, video documentation is acomplicated mixture of sound and image which can give us more directinformation. So it is less influenced by the one who took（takes） record and the one who interprets it. On the contrarily,the written record only have the words without language. Let’s take ourancestors’ life and culture for instance, we can hardly understand the writtendocuments of our ancestor from hundreds of years ago if(unless)we have
undergone special training, even thoseprofessionals who have learned to understand ancient literature and totransform it into forms acceptable by our contemporary culture, are not able to ensure us100 percent sincerity to the original information our ancestor want to convey .(这句话成份很多不对) However, when we use camera video to make and show the history bysome special electronic experts ,we will be ableto see a lively revival of the life period in ancient time.

However, it is rash to say that video camera can replace the traditionalwritten documents and become the new domination of documentation field sincevideo record has its limits in some respects. The video media is just suitable to record happenings rather than detaileddata and information. For example, video cannot documentthe terms of a complex contract agreement, or
accurate statistics about the flying log. Andthe video is of little use when it comes to documenting a person’s subjectivemind and impressions on something, or the personal experience of travellingsomewhere. For instance, when a new construction isbuilt, the constructor could use the video records to show people its vaguestructure and external image but not the clear information about the every facility, only the written records can give people themost direct impression.
最后一句前面应该加句论证来过渡的，或者最后一句另起一行，因为你要说的是两种方式的结合。
To sum up, the speaker’s conclusion overstates the importance of video records,At least to some extent. In fact, when it comes to documenting temporal,spatial events, video records are more convenient and complete. However, whenit comes to some detailed information, I tend to choose written records whichare needed to quantify and provide meaningful details aroundour world.

首先建议写长句子的时候检查一下句子的成份，这反面你错误不少，而且常常把主语落下或者写错
其次，层次还是清楚的，但模仿范文的痕迹重，这点我也有。

imlifewillingUID: 2706999

by 懒蚂蚁


【7】.
The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records.



There is a hot discuss about which is more important in documenting our contemporary life between video records and written records nowadays. In my opinion, it is obvious that video records have some advantages in recording our life in some aspects. In the meantime, we should not ignore their disadvantages which make them less suitable to record other aspects of our life than written records. However, with the development of science and technology, it is very possible that video records will be much more predominant than written records in the future.


In the first place, there is no denying the fact that video records have some merits in recording our life, which make them more and more popular among people. On one hand, they can make a accurate records of contemporary life with sounds and motions. Before camera comes into being, it is impossible for people to remember their predecessors' faces, not to mention their voices and others aspects that can not record by written records. On the other hand, with the help of video records, we can make a thing more convincing. Since the cameras can record what we do and how we do it at an accurate time, we can utilize them to prove the innocence of a man, at the same time we can use it to convict someone of his/her offence. This is why so many cameras have been invited into public places such as big markets, airports and so forth. In a word, video records do help us a lot in our everyday life.


In the second place, it is true that there are some defects of video camera in recording our daily life. Firstly, it is too expensive and complicated to be used widely. Nowadays only a little part of people can afford a camera and only some teenages can manipulate sophisticatedly . On the contrary, it is easy and cheap to record something happens in life by written records for the reason that what it needs are no more than a paper and a pencil. Secondly, compared to the written records, the recording time of video camera is too short. While a book can represent a history more than thousand years, it is hard for video camera to record the affairs that have occured in several days. Lastly, at least for now, it is impossible for video camera to record our life subjectively even though they provide us with objective and accurate pictures. However, with the written records, it is simple to depict what we think in languages. So nowadays video record camera can not substitute the written records. They will coexist and complement to each other for some time.


However, with the development of our society, it is possible that video camera would supersede the role of written records in the future. With the electronic technologies advancing, increasing the record volume while decreasing the size of record equipments will not be a dream anymore. It is very similar to the changing of computers from a roomsize one to nowadays' portable computer. What's more, the price of camera will be decrease dramatically and the operation of them is going to become more easy. Maybe in the future, with the communication between people an video records can we feel their emotions in the records. All in all, with the development of science and technology, it is not impossible for video camera to become an alternative recording method, just as recording on papers taking the place of carving on bamboos in China.


To sum up, it is hard to make a comparison about who is more important between video camera and written records in contemporary society since they have isolated advantages. However, with our society advancing, more and more people with turn to video camera for recording their everyday life.



修改SHX
It’s tempting to agree with the speaker’s assertion that the video camera plays an important role as an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life involves objective recount details. However, the speaker extremely extends this assertion to a definite point that video camera totally overwhelms written records while ignoring written records perform better in transmitting transmit subjective emotion.
观点明确
One thing I have to admit is that video camera has gradually come to our daily life since the last century. It’s adopted widely in all kinds of realms and we can’t live without it. As for the reason, compared with written records, video camera appears to be more the embodiment of objective situations. So video camera, as a powerful weapon, provides convincing evidence in laws. For example, the whole stealing process of the thief under the monitor can be totally recorded as the evidence of the lawsuit. Moreover, there is another function that camera video play as an effective tool for recording-leaving people sweet and glorious memory. Supposing the scene of a basketball game or a football game, it’s impossible for a person even a trained news reporter to recount either of them in details. Contrarily, camera video, in some extent, perfectly keep the detailed moment, which might be one of the most valuable and meaningful memory. Another apt example involves recording baby’s life. It’s believed nothing can match video which reminder a person a full memory of his naive children hood when he refer to the video which keep fragments of his baby’s time.
这段好像论证很少，都是例子了。
Having recognized that camera video has been an indispensable element as a recording style in people’s daily life, by no means can we deny that in some cases, it is pale compared with written records. As an up-to-date technological product, it is complicated for many people even the old. Contrarily, written records are adaptive to almost everyone. Meanwhile, written records obviously bring us great convenience for we are used to take it any time. However, when we refer to camera records, it’s heavier.
太草率，而且第一句的中心句应该有个转折关系，但是我怎么感觉没有。
Even though the disadvantages of camera video records discussed above might be no longer disadvantages as the development of the technology and the society, we have to admit that written records still perform as important member of all typical records for the reason（哪一个原因？）. When it comes to documenting a person’s subjective state of mind, impression or even reflections of an event, video camera is of no practical use at all. So to the extent that personal interpretation adds dimension and richness to the records, written records is actually more important than video records.

Based on above, the speaker overstates the comparative importance of video records. At least to some cases, when we refer to recalling the moment before, video records are more objective and detailed. However, what we saw through video records are just a tiny fraction of our life and time. written records are need to provide meaningful and illustrative information to the world around us.

有些句子还有毛病，在文中用红色标记出来。
总体上感觉论证无力，正文第一段大部分都是例子；第二段简单对比，第三段仍是匆忙的对比。没有深入论证
总体上说思路是对的。但是读过以后好像你就是简单的摆明了优缺点。自己没有分析。

BryanpengUID: 2705644

ISSUE 7   "The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."

By snow


With the development of science and technology, the world has changed a lot. Some inventions bring us a lot of convenience such as video camera can provides an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. But whether has it become a more important form of documentation than written records? I don’t think so.

To begin with, there is no doubt that using the video camera to record things which happen around us has become one of the most important methods in our daily life. For one thing ,the video camera can help us to record something unforgettable which we may experience only once all our life . For example , when we go on a tour to France in our summer holiday, we must go to have a look at the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower which are famous around the world. Then the pictures that we take by using our video camera are meaningful because of not only are the sights famous ,but also we may never come there forever and these photos can bring us lots of wonderful memories. For another , the video camera can also take a record of the process and reality of things which contributing to us to take evidence and investigate .For instance, when there is a car accident happening at the crossroads , the police and relevant departments can transfer the video camera to investigate the process of the accident and enter a judgement that who should be responsible for the accident.

However, the traditional written records also has its own advantages that video camera can’t take place. For the followings reasons: firstly, written records can record individual mood ,but the video camera can’t .When we know that we are admitted to the university , we may take a note to record our excitement and our goal. Can pictures record our mood? Of course not. Secondly, we can get some knowledge or information by referring to the books which were written before. When we want to know some knowledge such as some mathematical formulations , Newton’s law, Shakespearse’s poems and so forth , we must go to the library to refer to related books .They are recorded in detail and we can know the deduced process of the formulations , the content for Newton’s law , the meaning of the poem clearly by reading the book , but can the video cameras bring us the same feelings and effects? Of course not. Thirdly ,there are less limited for written records than the video camera . We can take books with us and take notes at anytime and anywhere . But if your battery has run down , your camera is useless.

So according to the two paragraphs above I want to say that both the video camera and the written records play an important role in different aspects, and they both have their own advantages which the other can’t replace . Even the video camera is widely used in our daily life , we can’t say t it has become a more important form of documentation than written records. We should use them together to get better results.




改stone


7、"The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."
My view to the issue is that video camera and written records have their own features. Although video camera can provide an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life, we cannot(这到底该怎么写,群内意见不统一can’t还是can not) say that it is more important than written records as a form of documentation.
Surely, the video camera has become one of the most important forms of documentation. Just as the speaker says, it can provide such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. More precisely(怎么翻译?更确切的说?那和后面一句搭配就不合理了), we can substantiate this view by (the)following aspects. First of all, using cameras, one can take pictures and videos of daily life and some experience(貌似可数) which are worth to be collected. For instance, when traveling in Paris, almost every tourist takes photos of Eiffel Tower, because it is a famous and interesting place, (这句的主语怎么讲)and will become an unforgettable experience in their whole life. Moreover, we can obtain accurate and convincing evidences for things like(Liking) the cases and propositions by cameras. It is well known that in a court, videos and pictures of crime scene are persuasive evidences, based on which we can punish those criminals. Similarly, science researches also need evidences. One hundred years ago, chemists proved their results by describing or repeating their experiments; however, nowadays, papers are attached by photos and videos, from which we can judge whether they obtain new materials from the chemical reactions(这段可以考究一下,写的很浅,意思不是很清晰,考究一下表述可能会更有说服力). Without video cameras, we may hardly image what President Obama looks like, News may be boring, so video camera, no doubt, has become a significant form of documentation.
However, written records are still a fundamental form of documentation, of which the importance can not be replaced. There are several reasons. First, the video camera can not record people’s attitude and soul. For example, we can take photos of Eiffel Tower; however can we record our adoration to it just by these pictures? Similarly, things like courage, character of a person, and mood can not be preserved by cameras. Second, the video camera can hardly record meaning, essential and usage of one thing. Take science research as an example. We can obtain some videos of a chemical reaction; however, we don’t know why the reaction happens just by these videos. Yet, meaning of this reaction is unknown. So, without written records, how can we preserve these stuffs? Furthermore, things like batteries, computers and printers all limit the use of cameras, whereas it is more convenient to use paper records. Therefore, we cannot say that the video camera is more important that written records(这句可以省去,在最后说明,要不显得多余).

Actually, if written records and video cameras are used together, it must be more effective, because the disadvantages of them can be avoided. For instance, our textbooks include explanations, graphs and pictures, which make the knowledge easy to be understood. (感觉有毛病,改为Our textbooks such as explanations ,graphs and pictures can make the knowledge easy to be understood好一点)Materials for papers and cases contain photos as well as illustrations; then, they will be more convincing. There are videos, picture and comments in some piece of news; and by these elements, the news are more interesting.
In sum, even the video camera has some many advantages and become widely used in our society; we cannot conclude that it is more important than written records. Actually, it is(will be更好些) more effective if we use both of them.


个人的一点愚见,不见得准确,可QQ讨论.
思路清晰,观点明确,很有条理,你很强大

yeshen2010UID: 2744103

Issue7: The video camera provides such as accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records.
提纲：
一、论点：摄像机有时确实能准确地记录下当前的生活，但不能说它比书面记录更重要。
二、摄像机和书面记录能准确记录下当前生活。例子：有的人喜欢用摄像机记录旅行，有的人则喜欢用日记来记录。
三、有的方面摄像机比书面记录更重要、更准确。如火山爆发
四、有的方面书面记录比摄像机更重要。如自然科学实验数据
五、总结

As the development of technology, video camera has been widely used all over the world. More and more people use it to record their daily life. Hence, there exists a point that video camera providing accurate and convincing record of contemporary life plays a much more important role than written records. From my perspective, I agree with the assertion that the video camera, to some extent, can provide accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. However, it is not reasonable to say that video camera is more important contrasting with written records. My view can be greatly substantiated by the following discussion.

Both video camera and written records can take an accurate and convincing record of temporary life. Recording with camera or words depends on one’s choice. Different people have different ideas. For instance, some people use camera to record their travel, while others use diary to record their trips. Video camera and written records are just two kinds of different means to record things.

Admittedly, video camera can provide more accurate and convincing record of contemporary life to some extent, such as the occurrence of nature phenomenon. Take the outbreak of volcanoes for example. If using literature to describe this phenomenon, maybe the book would say it is spectacular. But how spectacular is it? The words cannot impress us too much. Yet the video camera which records the real phenomenon can shock us more greatly than written records.

Furthermore, written records get more important than video camera in some cases, such as science experiments, economics. The data in a science experiment is much more important than the result. Without the data, we cannot analyze the result. And in economic realm, GDP is a much better way to measure the situation of social economic than a video camera does. Video camera just can screen the facial phenomenon, rather reflect the truth. Maybe the video camera records the prosperity in a mall, filled with numbers of people. Whether the mall has a good sale or not can be measured by the statistical data of selling. The data can accurately reflect the real situation.

In conclusion, video camera has the same function as written records. While they both can be used to record our contemporary life. It is a much better way to reveal the nature of our life through using both of them.

求狠拍！

改snow的


With the development of science and technology, the world has changed a lot. Some inventions bring us a lot of convenience such as video camera which（代词作主语时不能省吧？） can provide us (加个宾语好像更好)an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. But whether has it become a more important form of documentation than written records? （whether好像不能引导一个疑问句，只能引导从句吧？建议改为：But does it become a more important form of documentation than written records? ） I don’t think so.

To begin with, there is no doubt that using the video camera to record things which happen around us has become one of the most important methods in our daily life. For one thing, the video camera can help us to record something unforgettable which we may experience only once in all our life. For example, when we go on a tour to France in our summer holiday, we must go to have a look at the Louvre and the Eiffel Tower which are famous around the world. Then the pictures that we take by using our video camera are meaningful because of not only are the sights famous（这里的倒装用得很好，学习之） ,but also we may never come there forever and these photos can bring us lots of wonderful memories. For another, the video camera can also take a record of the process and reality of things which contributing to us to take evidence and investigate（这一句的意思没看懂） .For instance, when there is a car accident happening at the crossroads, the police and relevant departments can transfer the video camera to investigate the process of the accident and enter a judgment that who should be responsible for the accident.

However, the traditional written records also has its own advantages that video camera can’t take place. For the followings reasons（建议改为Here are the following reasons.）: firstly, written records can record individual mood ,but the video camera can’t .When we know that we are admitted to the university , we may take a note to record our excitement and our goal. Can pictures record our mood? Of course not. Secondly, we can get some knowledge or information by referring to the books which were written before. When we want to know some knowledge such as some mathematical formulations, Newton’s law, Shakespearse’s poems and so forth, we must go to the library to refer to related books .They are recorded in detail and we can know the deduced process of the formulations , the content for(of) Newton’s law , the meaning of the poem clearly by reading the book(建议后面不要了，前面三项正好可以形成排比) , but can the video cameras bring us the same feelings and effects? Of course not. Thirdly, there are less limited for written records than the video camera. We can take books with us and take notes at anytime and anywhere. But if your battery has run down, your camera is useless.

So according to the two paragraphs above, I want to say that both the video camera and the written records play an important role in different aspects, and they both have their own advantages which the other can’t replace . Even the video camera is widely used in our daily life, we can’t say it has become a more important form of documentation than written records. We should use them together to get better results.

小结：
文章层次清晰，论点很清楚。倒装、排比使本文增色不少。不过有些时候会觉得有点啰嗦、重复。另外建议不要用缩写：如don’t,写为do not可能会更好，不知道e-rator是不是会更好识别？（纯属猜测。）

niyinanUID: 2693578

by 塞纳 niyinan
ISSUE7 - "The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."


Being a great invention of our modern society, video camera has been widely used in more and more respects and take place of the written records in certain respects. Concerning this, some people propose that in today's society, video camera plays a more significant role in documenting  than written records. However, as for me, I do not agree with the speaker as he fails to consider the different advantages and limitations of two record types and overrate the importance of video camera in contemporary life.

Admittedly, owning to its advantages of providing accurate and convincing records, in many developed countries, video camera has already been an indispensable part of both public events and private parties and ceremonies. By reviewing the vivid video of wedding ceremony, an old couple could feel the happiness and sweetness on wedding ceremony again directly and accurately., while written records may just indicate us basic and boring the data, such as the date  and place of the wedding, the names of people who attended and the general progress of the ceremony, failing to represent the scenes fraught with harmony and sweet. Furthermore, vivid and living records could offer us intuitive and shocked feelings to us. For instance, during each augural of an American President the speech of the president makes us feel a strong strength of believing in life, liberty and pursuit of happiness that have already been the spirits of the nation and people. Videos recording the battles and emergencies always attract the attention of the public since they can offer people the strong and shocked visual impacts which written records can never bring to us.
Thus, in some respects, video camera is highly valued and will gradually take the place of written records—no one will abandon football live and just be satisfied with the boring score.

Having recognized the advantages of video camera, we also need to realize that written records are still playing an essential role in many aspects of our daily life. Written records could record much more complex thoughts, values of human minds while video camera could only records what happened in the realistic world. The reason people are deeply attracted by literature is that all kinds of literature types could provide them vivid depiction of human spiritual world and make it possible for common people to enjoy the fruition of human intellect marrow, communicate with the greatest minds of human beings and embrace the most precious things of human, such as beautiful virtues, sacred beliefs and desire for freedom and democracy. Moreover, in a society that worships individuality, written records filled with personal emotions and unique viewpoints are often valued more since as the unique and different view make an individual an independent person instead of the copy of another one.

The speaker assumes that accurate and convincing records are the best ones, as a matter of fact, in different respects, people need different kinds of records with different characters, in news reports, accurate and vivid videos are highly valued while in indicating the spiritual world, people place a high value on individuality and different and novel views.

From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that both written records and video camera have each advantages and will still exert their beneficial impacts on different respects due to different needs of the people.

fly-2011UID: 2707582

321
Our life has great changes since the increasingly development of science and technology. Although I agree that the video camera provides a more accurate and convincing record of contemporary life than written records, yet we could not ignore the irreplaceable functions written records plays. Thus I contend that no one can take the place of the other one, both of them are crucial in our life.

Firstly, video cameras present us with moving images with which written records cannot. So many temporal events we need to record everyday, and it is video cameras' responsibility to record them down. When the Beijing Olympics happened last year, we watched it on television or through the Internet if have no chance to arrive at the right place. From this part, video cameras provide us with vivid images and visual effects, which is superior to that of written records. The other advantage of video cameras is that they are easy to take along whenever you go, regardless of heavy qualities which written records possess. On the contrary, written records possess a certain quantity of quality which made them inconvenient to bring from one place to another, especially by plane or by bus. Mentioned these aspects, written records cannot keep up with video cameras.

However, though with these advantages, we could not consider video cameras are more important than written records, their disadvantages cannot be ignored. After all, video cameras are technological instruments, they have to preserve under certain conditions such as a proper temperature, humidity and so forth. We heard about more and more reports these days that criminals cheat the public by falsifying video documentation. Under most conditions, we could not catch the deep meanings behind the record, but just in the face of a superficial image and visual effects. From this point, video cameras cannot be taken position by written records.

In addition, written records have some advantages which video cameras do not. As written records are often provided by humans, they present us with human’s objective feelings and viewpoints which made them more comprehensive. More importantly, written records could provide us clear definitions and background of an event. For instance, the novel Ordinary, written by Lu Yao in old China, reflects social condition at that time. Thus the video camera cannot finish such perfect job. In fact, national laws or social regulations are recorded down by written records, for the reason that they seem more formal. With these advantages, we can conclude that written records are no less significant than video cameras.

In the end, we can conclude that though video camera could provide us with accurate and convincing record of contemporary life, it does not mean written records are less important. In fact, the written records are vital to our society, and we combine them together in turn to get overall record.
求狠拍+意见，谢谢



改楼上
Being a great invention of our modern society, video camera has been widely used in more and more respects and take(has taken) place of the written records in certain respects. Concerning this, some people propose that in today's society, video camera plays a more significant role in documenting  than written records. However, as for me, I do not agree with the speaker as he fails to consider（compare）the different advantages and limitations of two record types and overrate the importance of video camera in contemporary life. 觉得观点比较清晰

Admittedly, owning to its advantages of providing accurate and convincing records, in many developed countries, video camera has already been an indispensable part of both public events and private parties and ceremonies. By reviewing the vivid video of wedding ceremony, an old couple could feel the happiness and sweetness on wedding ceremony again directly and accurately., while written records may just indicate us basic and boring the data(the basic and boring data?), such as the date  and place of the wedding, the names of people who attended and the general progress of the ceremony, failing to represent the scenes fraught with harmony and sweet. Furthermore, vivid and living records could offer us intuitive and shocked feelings to us. For instance, during each augural of an American President the speech of the president makes us feel a strong strength of believing in life, liberty and pursuit of happiness that have already been the spirits of the nation and people. Videos recording the battles and emergencies always attract the attention of the public since they can offer people the strong and shocked visual impacts which written records can never bring to us.（这一句可以简略些分开两句写） Thus, in some respects, video camera is highly valued and will gradually take the place of written records—no one will abandon football live and just be satisfied with the boring score.
总的来说观点很明确，讲了video camera的好处，论述也很好。

Having recognized the advantages of video camera, we also need to realize that written records are still playing an essential role in many aspects of our daily life. Written records could record much more complex thoughts, values of human minds while video camera could only records what happened in the realistic(real) world. The reason people are deeply attracted by literature is that all kinds of literature types could provide them（with）vivid depiction of human spiritual world and make it possible for common people to enjoy the fruition of human intellect marrow, communicate with the greatest minds of human beings and embrace the most precious things of human, such as beautiful virtues, sacred beliefs and desire for freedom and democracy. Moreover, in a society that worships individuality, written records filled with personal emotions and unique viewpoints are often valued more since as the unique and different view make an individual an independent person instead of the copy of another one.
语言很不错啊，比较地道。
The speaker assumes that accurate and convincing records are the best ones, as a matter of fact, in different respects, people need different kinds of records with different characters, in news reports, accurate and vivid videos are highly valued while in indicating the spiritual world, people place a high value on individuality and different and novel views.（可以分成两句吧）

From what has been discussed above, we may safely draw the conclusion that both written records and video cameras have each advantages and will still exert their beneficial impacts on different respects due to different needs of the people.
总之觉得观点明确，个人看来语言比较好。