刘小钢炮的独立作文，get started from jan 26th

lxg198607UID: 2564115

         Recently, people have been debating over the statement that it is supposed to take more time to do what they want to do instead of doing what they should do".From my point of view, i basically go against the saying above. Because this sort of tone obviously exaggerates the role individual enjoyment play in people's lives. I admit that hobbies really mean something to people, yet nothing could be more important than their duties.So people should spend most of their time doing what they have to do, then take the rest to do personal enjoyment.
         Admittedly, the part personal enjoyment play can not be ignored.Enjoying their likings indeed help people keep in a good mood and get them away from pressures. I want to take my personal experience for example. Every time i get some problems in study and feel upset, i will play PC games for a while. Full engagement in PC game makes me feel relaxed and forget troubles soon.And a clear mind enable those problems easier to handle. Besides, without hobbies, people's lives will be boring and less colorful, hobby and life are just like spice and meal, and adding seasoning is just going to make the meal tasted better. With the help of hobbies , people are living everyday to the fullest. Therefore, as long as personal enjoyment is used properly, it will affect people in a good way.
        Nevertheless, the primary task of a man is to do what he should do. Lives sticking to jobs and duties may be tough and boring, however, people must take them: Adults must work hard to support their families; students are ought to study hard to obtain more knowledge. This is the way people are supposed to be. Only in this way, the world would run in order. if not the world will be in chaos.For example, i cannot imagine how bad it is if policemen play poker all days, or student are engaged to play computer games in class.Moreover, people will perfect their selves during the process of job, learning experiences and gain abilities that can not be got from enjoyment to be useful to the society, the nation, and the world. Progresses on people also promote the advancement of society. Amazing tall buildings and incredible technologies are not created in enjoyments but in jobs. Only people do well their own jobs and perfect constantly,the dream forever in people’s mind that is to make a better world will come true.
          To sum up, based on doing a nice job, people do gain a lot of benefits from spending a certain amount of time on personal enjoyment. While it is no that good for people and society if they overdo it.

ivybettyUID: 2328308

Recently, people have been debating over the statement that it is supposed to take more time to do what they want to do instead of doing what they should do".From my point of view, i basically go against the saying above. Because this sort of tone obviously exaggerates the role individual enjoyment play in people's lives. I admit that hobbies really mean something to people, yet nothing could be more important than their duties.So people should spend most of their time doing what they have to do, then take the rest to do personal enjoyment.
(观点鲜明,句式多样.)         
Admittedly, the part personal enjoyment play can not be ignored.Enjoying their likings indeed help people keep in(感觉应该省掉) a good mood and get(keep/stay) them away from pressures. I want to take my personal experience for example. Every time i get some problems in study and feel upset, i will play PC games for a while. Full engagement in PC game makes me feel relaxed and forget troubles soon.And a clear mind enable those problems easier to handle. (感觉是直译,有点怪.)Besides, without hobbies, people's lives will be boring and less colorful, hobby and life are just like spice and meal, and adding seasoning is just going to make the meal tasted better.(to add flavor is to make the meal yummy,) With the help of hobbies , people are living everyday to the fullest.(同样感觉象直译) Therefore, as long as personal enjoyment is used properly, it will affect people in a good way.
Nevertheless, the primary task of a man is to do what he should do. Lives sticking to jobs and duties may be tough and boring, however, people must take them: Adults must work hard to support their families; students are ought to study hard to obtain more knowledge. This is the way people are supposed to be. Only in this way, the world would run in order. if not the world will be in chaos.For example, i cannot imagine how bad it is if policemen play poker all days, or student are engaged to play computer games in class.Moreover, people will perfect their selves during the process of job,(有点别扭!) learning experiences and gain abilities that can not be got from enjoyment to be useful to(for) the society, the nation, and the world. Progresses on people also promote the advancement of society. Amazing tall buildings and incredible technologies are not created in enjoyments but in jobs. Only people do well their own jobs and perfect constantly,the dream forever in people’s mind that is to make a better world will come true.
        To sum up, based on doing a nice job, people do gain a lot of benefits from spending a certain amount of time on personal enjoyment. While it is no that good for people and society if they overdo it.
全文观点鲜明,逻辑严密,气势磅礴.学习了!
请注意非人称词作主语的情况.
另外,有些句子有点别扭

lxg198607UID: 2564115

JAN 28th
Because of rapid paces of lives in modern times, many people feel that they have little time to share with their family members.So it is possible that their tiny wishes of eating with family would be very difficult to realize. However, people should spare more time to eat regularly with their family, considering that they will keep good family ties and at the same time help to relax from tensions

Firstly, eating together is quite important to maintain the bond between family members. As we all know.Due to fierce competition, people especially young men are very busy and live under huge pressures caused by work. they have to work hard to support their families. Naturally, they are not willing to spend much time dining that could be spent on works, not to mention dining regularly.Yet, few people know the meaning of eating with their family. It is just more than eating together. It is about more great things.For example every time i get home to eat with my parents, and they are always eager to know everything about my recent lives.i know they just want me to know how much they love me. If we do not dine regularly, we can not meet each other, surely there is no way to know what they think. So dining together is more likely a mean to let family members know they care about each other. This sort of routine Obviously creates a lot of chance to get together, family ties are then probably strengthened. I believe get-together is the most wonderful thing ever in their lives.

Moreover, to eat with family as a routine help people get relaxed and get rid of stress temporarily. Talking with family members,People may soon forget the troubles they get in works. That is because a small talk filled with loves make them feel happy and comfortable.In addition, people always have good appetites with food made by mother.A delicious meal enable people energetic enough to deal with the tough work the following day

To sum up, it is really essential for families to take meals together. The power it brings is much greater than people think. As long as people do it, i believe they will do well in their business, meanwhile have a great time with family member.

tomatooUID: 2754865

Because of rapid paces of lives in modern times, many people feel that they have little time to share with their family members.So it is possible that their tiny wishes of eating with family would be very difficult to realize. However, people should spare more time to eat regularly with their family, considering that they will keep good family ties and at the same time help to relax from tensions 5 k$ E, T' H9 r: _6 O: h( m4 w

Firstly, eating together is quite important to maintain the bond between family members. As we all know.Due to fierce competition, people especially young men are very busy and live under huge pressures caused by work. they have to work hard to support their families. Naturally, they are not willing to spend much time dining that could be spent on works（work当工作讲是不可数，作品是可数）, not to mention dining regularly.Yet, few people know the meaning of eating with their family. It is just more than eating together. It is about more great things.For example every time i（I） get home to eat with my parents, and they are always eager to know everything about my recent lives.i（I） know they just want me to know how much they love me. If we do not dine regularly, we can not meet each other, surely there is no way to know what they think. So dining together is more likely a mean（means才是方法的意思，mean没这个意思） to let family members know they care about each other. This sort of routine Obviously creates a lot of chance（chances） to get together, family ties are(family ties家庭关系用is) then probably strengthened. I believe get-together is the most wonderful thing ever in their lives.

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Moreover, to eat with family as a routine help(helps) people get relaxed and get rid of stress temporarily(这个词用这里不太好，想褒却有点贬的意思，看到后面的soon了，你是想说立刻吗？用instantly吧！). Talking with family members,People may soon forget the troubles they get in works（work）. That is because a small talk filled with loves（love作名词是抽像名词，不可数） make them feel happy and comfortable.In addition, people always have good appetites with(have appetite for不用with) food made by mother.A delicious meal enable people energetic enough to deal with the tough work the following day: f, T" u% f3 N6 Y

To sum up, it is really essential for families to take meals together. The power it brings is much greater than people think. As long as people do it, i(I) believe they will do well in their business, meanwhile have a great time with family member(members).

论点明确，论证充分但稍微有点干
表达流畅，句式多样化，难把握的名词的单复数有些问题
字母大小写问题是小，但要养成习惯，呵呵
结构上稍有头重脚轻（第二个点干巴巴道理论证，自然展不开，可能因为时间原因）
总体而言，非常不错！
Come on!

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

Because of rapid paces of lives in modern times, many people feel that they have little time to share with their family members.So it is possible that their tiny wishes of eating with family would be very difficult to realize. However, people should spare more time to eat regularly with their family, considering that they will keep good family ties and at the same time help to relax from tensions.

Firstly, eating together is quite important to maintain the bond between (between用于两者之间，多人的话用among) family members. As we all know.Due (,due) to fierce competition, people especially young men are very busy and live under huge pressures caused by work. they have to work hard to support their families. Naturally, they are not willing to spend much time (on) dining that could be spent on works, not to mention dining regularly.Yet, few people know the meaning of eating with their family. It is just more than eating together (感觉跟前面有点重复，改成common meals不知道怎么样). It is about (could bear) more great things.For example every time i get home to eat with my parents, and they are always eager to know everything about my recent lives.i know they just want me to know how much they love me. If we do not dine regularly, we can not meet each other, surely there is no way to know what they think. So dining together is more likely a mean to let family members know they care about each other. This sort of routine Obviously creates a lot of chance to get (families) together, family ties are then probably strengthened. I believe get-together is the most wonderful thing ever in their lives (life).

Moreover, to eat with family as a routine help people get relaxed and get rid of stress temporarily. Talking with family members,People may soon forget the troubles they get in works. That is because a small talk filled with loves make them feel happy and comfortable.In addition, people always have good appetites with food made by mother.A delicious meal enable (make) people energetic enough to deal with the tough work the following day.

To sum up, it is really essential for families to take (have) meals together. The power it brings is much greater than people think (much more beyond people's thinking). As long as people do it, i believe they will do well in their business, meanwhile have a great time with family member.

文章主题鲜明，语言也没太大问题，建议继续多积累一些native的表达形式。只是有点感觉中间陈述的部分有点头重脚轻，不如把中间两端的 顺序调一下，可能这样的感觉就没那么明显了吧！加油！

lxg198607UID: 2564115

Jan 30th
Recently, there is heated debate over the issue whether the government should take more money to improve public transportation or to improve access internet. From my point of view, i basically agree with the statement that improving transportation condition should be superior to the latter one. That is because the internet compared with transportation probably is not the necessity influencing most people's lives, though the use of internet is highly recognized and some people even can not live without the internet.

First of all, i admit that cyber world has penetrated every aspect of people' lives. Improvement of access to internet is indeed an important thing the government should do for the people.No matter we are students or white collars, we prefer to study or work with computers rather than use paper stuff. Since with the aid of cyber world , we can exchange our ideas with bosses or colleags instantly and submit our assignments in a second. Moreover, the internet is also widely used for our relaxations. For example, chatting online or playing games with other net friends become more and more common in our lives.However, i bet almost everybody know how much the public transportation conditions means to us.We can live well without a fluent internet but perhaps we feel terrible if the place we live in does not have a good transportation. Because It is one of the most important infrastructure that closely related to everybody's life.Students must ride bikes or take buses to go to the school and white collars have to drive cars to get to their offices.So we can imagine a poor transportation is sure to affect their lives.if the government does not do well in this point,lives with a good access to internet make no sense.

Second of all, if the government make a budget to improve public transportation,it will bring out countless merits to people.Improving public transportation is certainly convenient to people's traveling and going out. I want to take my city for example,the place where my live is a not a big city like shanghai, just a medium one that many people even in china don not hear about. Over the past five years, local government have been devoted to improving the public transportation, taking several actions like paving more roads and set up BRT(Bus rapid transmit).Now everything is going better. The scene that many citizens are stuck in their ways home rarely happen. And of course it costs much less time to their destination.From the government side,if well done,it will win a lot of supports from electors meanwhile get much credits among people.I believe this sort of double win situation is well accepted by the government and people.

last but not the least, the development of public transportation will lead to the improvement in investment environment,attracting a great deal of investments. Obviously, public transportation is one of the most important factors that affects the investor's plan.The investor is more like to put more money in the place with a good transportation. As we know, a broad road is going to help the investor save a lot of costs during transportation, at the same time appeal a great amount of clients. As a old Chinese saying goes,
" more roads you build, more money you have ".

Sum up, i have to say that a good access internet means something to people. Yet it is still far from important than public transportation. Besides, taken so many advantages it brings into consideration , to improve public transportation should be the first option on the list the government should think of.

tomatooUID: 2754865

Recently, there is heated debate over the issue whether the government should take more money to improve public transportation or to improve access internet. From my point of view, i basically agree with the statement that improving transportation condition should be superior to the latter one. That is because the internet compared with transportation probably is not the necessity influencing most people's lives, though the use of internet is highly recognized and some people even can not live without the internet. ! K/ j7 F; E/ _$ q: G

First of all, i admit that cyber world has penetrated every aspect of people' lives. Improvement of access to internet is indeed an important thing the government should do for the people.No matter we are students or white collars, we prefer to study or work with computers rather than use paper stuff. Since with the aid of cyber world , we can exchange our ideas with bosses or colleags instantly and submit our assignments in a second. Moreover, the internet is also widely used for our relaxations. For example, chatting online or playing games with other net friends become more and more common in our lives.However, i bet almost everybody know how much the public transportation conditions means to us.We can live well without a fluent internet but perhaps we feel terrible if the place we live in does not have a good transportation. Because It is one of the most important infrastructure that closely related to everybody's life.Students must ride bikes or take buses to go to the school and white collars have to drive cars to get to their offices（自己开车不算公共交通）.So we can imagine a poor transportation is sure to affect their lives.if the government does not do well in this point,lives with a good access to internet make no sense.: o! I' J1 T0 B7 L( `

Second of all, if the government make a budget to improve public transportation,it will bring out countless merits to people.Improving public transportation is certainly convenient to people's traveling and going out. I want to take my city for example,the place where my live is a not a big city like shanghai（上海不是一个大城市？呵呵）, just a medium one that many people even in china don not hear about（有不知道上海的中国人吗？you are kidding）. Over the past five years, local government have been devoted to improving the public transportation, taking several actions like paving more roads and set up BRT(Bus rapid transmit).Now everything is going better. The scene that many citizens are stuck in their ways home rarely happen. And of course it costs much less time to their destination.From the government side,if well done,it will win a lot of supports from electors meanwhile get much credits among people.I believe this sort of double win situation is well accepted by the government and people.4 F5 w7 X) J
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last but not the least, the development of public transportation will lead to the improvement in investment environment,attracting a great deal of investments. Obviously, public transportation is one of the most important factors that affects the investor's plan.The investor is more likely to put more money in the place with a good transportation. As we know, a broad road is going to help the investor save a lot of costs during transportation, at the same time appeal a great amount of clients. As a old Chinese saying goes,8 B; h3 p" q; G" r
" more roads you build, more money you have ".

O- [! g& Z  ^
Sum up, i have to say that a good access internet means something to people. Yet it is still far from important than public transportation. Besides, taken so many advantages it brings into consideration , to improve public transportation should be the first option on the list the government should think of.

you definitely did a great job.
but from my point of view, there is no need to spend extra effort on emphasizing how important the internet is. you have to mention it, but not too muh.

lxg198607UID: 2564115

ms 我举例上海是用来形容前面的big city的。早成歧义了。。

皇甫秋荻UID: 2638790

Recently, there is heated debate over the issue whether the government should take more money to improve public transportation or to improve access internet. From my point of view, i basically agree with the statement that improving transportation condition should be superior to the latter one. That is because the internet compared with transportation probably is not the necessity influencing most people's lives, though the use of internet is highly recognized and some people even can not live without the internet.
First of all, i admit that cyber  world has penetrated every aspect of people' lives. Improvement of access to internet is indeed an important thing the government should do for the people. No matter we are students or white collars, we prefer to study or work with computers rather than use paper stuff. Since with the aid of cyber world , we can exchange our ideas with bosses or colleags （colleages） instantly and submit our assignments in a second. Moreover, the internet is also widely used for our relaxations. For example, chatting online or playing games with other net friends become more and more common in our lives. However, i bet almost everybody know how much the public transportation conditions means to us. We can live well without a fluent internet but perhaps we feel terrible if the place we live in does not have a good transportation. Because It is one of the most important infrastructure that closely related to everybody's life. Students must ride bikes or take buses to go to the school and white collars have to drive cars to get to their offices. So we can imagine a poor transportation is sure to affect their lives. if (If) the government does not do well in this point, lives (living) with a good access to internet make no sense.
Second of all, if the government make a budget to improve public transportation, it will bring out countless merits to people. Improving public transportation is certainly convenient to (for) people's traveling and going out. I want to (用 would like to 比较好) take my city （hometown 这个词比较贴切） for （an） example, the place where my （I） live is a not a big city like shanghai, just a medium one that many people even in china don （do 笔误吧？） not hear about. Over the past five years, local government have been devoted to improving the public transportation, taking several actions like paving more roads and set （setting “and”前后要一致哦！~） up BRT(Bus rapid transmit).Now everything is going better. The scene that many citizens are stuck in their ways home rarely happen （happens 这个是scene的谓语）. And of course it costs much less time to their destination. From the government side, if well done, it will win a lot of supports from electors meanwhile get much credits among people. I believe this sort of double win situation is well accepted by the government and people.
last but not the least, the development of public transportation will lead to the improvement in investment environment, attracting a great deal of investments. Obviously, public transportation is one of the most important factors that affects the investor's plan. The investor is more like （likely） to put more money in the place with a good transportation. As we know, a broad road is going to （will） help the investor save a lot of costs during transportation, at the same time appeal to a great amount of clients. As a old Chinese saying goes " more roads you build, more money you have
Sum up, i have to say that a good access internet means something to people. Yet it is still far from important than public transportation. Besides, taken so many advantages it brings into consideration, to improve public transportation should be the first option on the list the government should think of.
总结：字数写的好多哦。向你学习。呵呵。感觉用来做GRE作文也差不多够了。
        小钢炮同学，在语法上有所欠缺。应该在写作文的过程中，注意一下。
        个人觉得既然赞同transportation那么第二段就不需费笔过多。否则会本末倒置。。。
        Anyway，good job~ 加油~

tomatooUID: 2754865

9# lxg198607 哦，你是这个意思，我理解错了，呵呵

lxg198607UID: 2564115

Feb 2th
In modern society filled with fierce competitions, people are getting tired and sick of heavy work.So travelling is becoming one of most fashionable ways to relax themselves.While there is a heated debated over the issue whether people should travel in a group or travel by themselves. I know both sides have good points on their choices, yet i am basically agree with the statement that attending a tourist group is the best way for a trip.

First of all, tourist guides and their companies definitely help travelers save a lot of troubles. If people travel alone, they have to do a ton of things just as booking a room, getting different kinds tickets including tickets of tourist attractions and airplane ticket or train ticket . Moreover, there are so many travelers in places of interests that it is common to wait in a long queue.These troubles would like to spare travelers' a big part of energy and time. however, if people participate in a tourist group,tourist guide will assist them to get rid of all these troubles. so for travelers, all they have to do is to have a wonderful time. In addition, Normally tourist guides will make a good itinerary for travelers in order to lead them to visit more interesting places. That means travelers may spend more time on wonderful places rather than on ordinary ones. Therefore, travelling with a tourist guide is really a good option for travelers


Second of all, another advantage of a group tourist is that travelers can get to know a lot of people having similar interests with themselves. And some of them even could become good friends.It is well known people will have a lot of funs with their new friends. Besides, these travelers in a group probably are from all corners of the nation.They could share experiences or interesting things about travelling with each other. I believe they will learn some knowledge impossible to get from books. Finally, travelers can help each other if any of them is in trouble.I want to take my experience for example, last summer i got a fever during a trip,a old lady in my tourist group got me a doctor and give me a lot warms and cares. I felt very sweet and lucky to know this kind lady. I have been keeping this friendship well since i learn something from it that we should help people out when they are in troubles. So travelling in a group indeed bring people many benefits that can not be obtained in a personal travel.

To sum up, i admit that travelling in a group will not make some travelers feel free because of several restrictions made by tourist guides.
But taking so many advantages of a group tourist into considerations, travelling in a group should be the superior to the other one.

tomatooUID: 2754865

In modern society filled with fierce competitions, people are getting tired and sick of heavy work.So travelling is becoming one of most fashionable ways to relax themselves.While there is a heated debated （debate在这里是名词）over the issue whether people should travel in a group or travel by themselves. I know both sides have good points on their choices, yet i am basically agree with the statement that attending a tourist group is the best way for a trip.$ i$ y# `4 n; }+ h/ X: b

First of all, tourist guides and their companies definitely help travelers save a lot of troubles. If people travel alone, they have to do a ton of things just as booking a room, getting different kinds tickets including tickets of tourist attractions and airplane ticket or train ticket . Moreover, there are so many travelers in places of interests that it is common to wait in a long queue.These troubles would like to spare(这个词用得好)travelers' a big part of energy and time. however, if people participate in a tourist group,tourist guide will assist them to get rid of all these troubles. so for travelers, all they have to do is to have a wonderful time. In addition, Normally tourist guides will make a good itinerary for travelers in order to lead them to visit more interesting places. That means travelers may spend more time on wonderful places rather than on ordinary ones. Therefore, travelling with a tourist guide is really a good option for travelers

A# ~$ ^
Second of all, another advantage of a group tourist is that travelers can get to know a lot of people having similar interests with themselves. And some of them even could become good friends.It is well known people will have a lot of funs with their new friends. Besides, these travelers in a group probably are from all corners of the nation.They could share experiences or interesting things about travelling with each other. I believe they will learn some knowledge impossible to get from books. Finally, travelers can help each other if any of them is in trouble.I want to take my experience for example, last summer i got a fever during a trip,a old lady in my tourist group got me a doctor and give me a lot warms and cares. I felt very sweet and lucky to know this kind lady. I have been keeping this friendship well since i learn something from it that we should help people out when they are in troubles. So travelling in a group indeed bring people many benefits that can not be obtained in a personal travel. % u: i6 t# ?5 k9 a
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To sum up, i admit that travelling in a group will not make some travelers feel free because of several restrictions made by tourist guides.. K9 X1 O: f! d1 DBut taking so many advantages of a group tourist into considerations, travelling in a group should be the superior to the other one.

很好！几乎没有问题！
很多词组很好！especially the "help out",etc..
有理有据，这次的论证很充分！
我看你是每两天写一篇，很好，有时间消化！很好的安排！

lxg198607UID: 2564115

哈哈，过奖了，不是我在消化， 其实是我比较懒。。。。的

小心littleheartUID: 2726034

In modern society filled with fierce competitions, people are getting tired and sick of heavy work. So travelling is becoming one of most fashionable ways to relax themselves. While there is a heated debated（debate） over the issue (that) whether people should travel in a group or travel by themselves. I know both sides have good points on their choices, yet i am basically agree with the statement that attending a tourist group is the best way for a trip.) @. d  J4 _1 Y

First of all, tourist guides and their companies definitely help travelers save（改成avoid，我没文化，没见过这样用的啊~~顺便问一下楼主save可以这样用么？？） a lot of troubles. If people travel alone, they have to do a ton of (好词，学习了~) things just as booking a room, getting different kinds （of）tickets including tickets of tourist attractions and airplane ticket or train ticket (后两个ticket也用复数，保持一致). Moreover, there are so many travelers in places of interests that it is common to wait in a long queue（这句啥意思啊？？？）.These troubles would like（likely） to spare travelers' a big part of energy and time. However, if people participate in a tourist group, tourist guide will assist them to get rid of all these troubles. So for travelers, all they have to do is to have a wonderful time. In addition, normally tourist guides will make a good itinerary for travelers in order to lead them to visit more interesting places. That means travelers may spend more time on wonderful places rather than on ordinary ones. Therefore, travelling with a tourist guide is really a good option for travelers.
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Second of all, another advantage of a group tourist is that travelers can get to know a lot of people having similar interests with themselves. And some of them even could become good friends. It is well known people will have a lot of funs with their new friends. Besides, these travelers in a group probably are from all corners of the nation. They could share (different) experiences or interesting things about travelling with each other. I believe (that) they will learn some knowledge impossible to get from books. Finally, travelers can help each other if any of them is in trouble. I want to take my experience for example, last summer i got a fever during a trip, a old lady in my tourist group got me a doctor and give me a lot warms and cares. I felt very sweet and lucky to know this kind lady. I have been keeping this friendship well since i learn something from it that we should help people out when they are in troubles. So travelling in a group indeed brings people many benefits that cannot be obtained in a personal travel.
7 z! l5 ^2 a9 Z. Q4 D
To sum up, I admit that travelling in a group will not make some travelers feel free because of several restrictions made by tourist guides.
But taking so many advantages of a group tourist into considerations, travelling in a group should be the superior to the other one.
文章整体没有什么大错，行文结构也很好，用词准确啊 ~~~呵呵，向楼主学习了~~