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[活动] tpo 1 integrated writing [复制链接]

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发表于 2010-2-3 14:13:01 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
本帖最后由 wyac 于 2010-2-3 14:15 编辑

In the reading passage, the writer believes that the four-day work system will benefit the economy based on three evidences. However, in the lecture, the professor has different views on these evidences, and he casts doubt on the reading passage by using a number of points.

First of all, according to the reading passage, four-day workweek will increase the company profits as a result of the employees make fewer errors in their works. In contrast, the professor indicates that this system will definitely increase the cost of company, because the company have to spend a lot of money on training new employees, buying new equipment, such as office equipment and computers, all of this will cut down the company's profits.

In addition, unlike the writer's opinion that the shortened workweek system will improve the economy condition, the professor holds the idea that the shortened workweek won't reduce unemployment rates, instead, the company will impose their employees to do the same task in four days, hence there will no additional job be provided and the current job will be more dissatisfactory.

Finally, referring to improve employees’ lives, the writer states that employees will have more free time in the four-day workweek system and this will improve the quality of their lives. In the meantime, the professor demonstrates that the shortened workweek is harmful for the employees' advance carrier. They will be more likely to lose their job than the full-time worker. Consequence, it will, in fact, risk the employees' life quality.
Just do it!
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发表于 2010-2-5 10:50:31 |只看该作者
In the reading passage, the writer believes that the four-day work system will benefit the economy based on three evidences. However, in the lecture, the professor has different views on these evidences, and he casts doubt on the reading passage by using a number of points.
|+ t6 m- S9 u

First of all, according to the reading passage, four-day workweek will increase the company profits as a result of the employees make fewer errors in their works.
(并且payroll不变) In contrast, the professor indicates that this system will definitely increase the cost of company, because the company have(has) to spend a lot of money on training new employees, buying new equipment, such as office equipmentoffice space and computers, all of this will cut down the company's profits.
U; e6 c) l) E

In addition, unlike the writer's opinion that the shortened workweek system will improve the economy condition(
文章中没有提到会改善经济形势), the professor holds the idea that the shortened workweek won't reduce unemployment rates, instead, the company will impose their employees to do the same task in four daysfive day, hence there will no additional job be provided and the current job will be more dissatisfactory(unpleasant).9 a: q* c5 a- l  [. v& Q/ \# X
1 q6 ~3 x7 Z( q  u" c
Finally, referring to improve employees’ lives, the writer states that employees will have more free time in the four-day workweek system and this will improve the quality of their lives. In the meantime, the professor demonstrates that the shortened workweek is harmful for the employees' advance carrier. They will be more likely to lose their job than the full-time worker. Consequence, it will, in fact, risk the employees' life quality.

最后,要是再加上一个结尾就更好了~

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板凳
发表于 2010-2-5 17:50:47 |只看该作者
紫日说的很详细了~

我觉得第一段是不是简单一点~
因为按照我的教训 综合写作到最后都会超出字数的 所以第一段不用这么多

第二段
和你一样丢掉了 additional payroll cost 不变
equipment 加 s
all of this  应该是these吧~
the same task in four days 有歧义啊
改成 the five-day tasks in four days 就好了

第三段
additional job  加 s吧~

第四段
carrier  拼错了 加s~
job 加 s
这段意思都对了 但是没把两点明确出来

加个第五段吧~

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