【big fish】 习作1.6 Argument 045 by rachelwang712

rachelwang712UID: 2757860

Argument No.045


The following appeared as an editorial in a wildlife journal.

"Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic region. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of a year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed, and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the decline in arctic deer populations is the result of deer being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea."

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提纲：
1local Hunter的论述没有科学依据
2全球变暖不代表Arctic地区的冰川融化，只是时间剪短
3可能是因为过热而失去事物。可能是过度捕猎

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In the editorial, the author draws a too casual correlationship between the reports from local hunters and the recent global warming trend to convince readers that deer population is suffering a decline much due to global warming. In fact, more scientific data is needed if the conclusion is to be made.

To begin with, the decrease in deer population is stated mainly by local hunters, a less credible source, rather than verified by scientific research. Usually, hunters' claim that one species is falling or hiking in number is largely based on their chances of seeing and catching them. However, it is probable that deer have become more smart so as to escape from their sight, thus letting hunters believe the amount of deer is declining. In order to command a more precise knowledge of the changes in number of Arctic deer, estimation from hunters can not be relied on. Instead, a scientific research has to be done.

Furthermore, despite the global warming trend, it does not necessarily mean that the same happens in Arctic region, let alone causing the sea ice to melt. To be exact, the concept "global wariming" refers to average temperature around the world as a whole is increasing. But odds are that temperature in one specific region is actually falling. So climate data in Arctic region is indispensable whether global warming is accelerating or alleviating. Even if winter there does get warmer, it is also possible that the trend merely cuts down the time of freezing or the climbing of temperature is so mild that the majority of sea remains turning ice. If that is true, deer will still be able to cross the frozen sea for migration.

Finally, on top of the reason mentioned in the editorial, other explanations call for attention as well. It is probable that Arctic deer is endangered because of over-hunting or the lack of adequate food when it is getting too warm for plants to grow well where they search for sustainity habitually. Very likely, melting sea ice can be part of the reason but not the only one. In consequence, other reasons need to be checked to have a thorough picture.

To sum up, the editorial is weak in its reasoning that global warming results in declining Arctic deer population for its lack of scientific research, it failure to inspect climate changes and their outcomes profoundly enough and its carelessness in ignoring other possible interpretations for the situation. If the author wants to add cogency to his point, he needs to address all the above problems exhaustively.

greekyUID: 2605662

1# rachelwang712

The following appeared as an editorial in a wildlife journal.

"Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic region. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of a year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed, and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the decline in arctic deer populations is the result of deer being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea."

-------------------------------

提纲：
1local Hunter的论述没有科学依据
2全球变暖不代表Arctic地区的冰川融化，只是时间剪短
3可能是因为过热而失去事物。可能是过度捕猎

------------------------------

In the editorial, the author draws a too casual correlationship between the reports from local hunters and the recent global warming trend to convince readers that deer population is suffering a decline much due to global warming. In fact, more scientific data is needed if the conclusion is to be made.

To begin with, the decrease in deer population is stated mainly by local hunters, a less credible source, rather than verified by scientific research. Usually, hunters' claim that one species is falling or hiking in number is largely based on their chances of seeing and catching them. However, it is probable that deer have become more smart so as to escape from their sight, thus letting hunters believe the amount of deer is declining. In order to command a more precise knowledge of the changes in number of Arctic deer, estimation from hunters can not be relied on. Instead, a scientific research has to be done.

Furthermore, despite the global warming trend, it does not necessarily mean that the same happens in Arctic region, let alone causing the sea ice to melt. To be exact, the concept "global wariming" refers to average temperature around the world as a whole is increasing. But odds are that temperature in one specific region is actually falling. So climate data in Arctic region is indispensable whether global warming is accelerating or alleviating. Even if winter there does get warmer, it is also possible that the trend merely cuts down the time of freezing or the climbing of temperature is so mild that the majority of sea remains turning ice. If that is true, deer will still be able to cross the frozen sea for migration.

Finally, on top of the reason mentioned in the editorial, other explanations call for attention as well. It is probable that Arctic deer is endangered because of over-hunting or the lack of adequate food when it is getting too warm for plants to grow well where they search for sustainity habitually. Very likely, melting sea ice can be part of the reason but not the only one. In consequence, other reasons need to be checked to have a thorough picture.

To sum up, the editorial is weak in its reasoning that global warming results in declining Arctic deer population for its lack of scientific research, it failure to inspect climate changes and their outcomes profoundly enough and its carelessness in ignoring other possible interpretations for the situation. If the author wants to add cogency to his point, he needs to address all the above problems exhaustively.
看完了，总体感觉逻辑挺清晰的 三个分论点都在段首写了中心句 一篇很流畅的文章了。  比较让我羡慕的就是文章的词汇变化和句式变化了，不过我下月十号就要考试了 这方面可能就没有什么好的方法提高了 有经验的话传授下偶好不好