Issue207

yorkerjasterUID: 2458950

题目：ISSUE207- "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them,societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who theyare."
对我来说巨难写的一道


Inthe era of rapid development of technology leading to globalization,there is a decline of rituals and ceremonies which are one of themeans of cultural identity. In response tothis issue, it is wise to give a full-sided consideration about therelation between rituals and cultural identity.

Admittedly,in some extent, rituals and ceremonies represent a kind of culturalidentity. Firstly, rituals and ceremonies remind people theirnational identity. An ample example is the Spring Festival ceremonywhich help define a kind of Chinese culture. On one hand, overseasChinese people use the ceremony to remind them who they are and whatthey come from. On the other hand, domestic Chinese people view it asa way to preserve their ancestors'culture. Secondly, rituals and ceremonies  present a kind of religionbelief. Consider the case of Mid-Autumn Festival ceremony which stemsfrom the ancient religion. It is well acknowledged that byimplementing rituals and ceremonies people fulfill their religionbelief. Therefore rituals and ceremoniesreflect the value of culture.

Althoughrituals and ceremonies are a kind of cultural representation in mostcases, there is trend that rituals and ceremonies lose the meaningbehind them due to globalization. An striking illustration is thecelebration of  Saint Valentine's Day. In China, there a growingnumber of people who celebrate the non-official holiday withoutknowing the implication of the day and its cultural value. The casedemonstrates the paradox that on one hand, more and more peopleconduct some ceremonies; on other hand, the implication of ceremoniesbecome less known. Hence, in some case, rituals and ceremonies losetheir cultural meaning.

Inaddition, rituals and ceremonies is not the only way to defineculture. Language and ethic can distinguishpeople from different cultures. In language, although nowadaysmany people become multilingual, the cultural background behindlanguage makes a difference between native speakers and foreigners.Even in the same nation, dialect distinguishes people from differentlocation where people have different subculture and tradition.Moreover, the value of ethic exerts significant impact on our cultureand nation. For instance, the value of Confucianism plays a profoundrole in Chinese culture and affects many generation of Chinesepeople.


Tosum up, without some exception, rituals and ceremonies in most casesrepresent the uniqueness of culture and nation identity. However,they are not the only way to define culture and there are many ofother factors such as language and ethic contributed to culturalidentity.

starshaneUID: 2616355

1# yorkerjaster


题目：ISSUE207- "Rituals and ceremonies help define a culture. Without them,societies or groups of people have a diminished sense of who theyare."
对我来说巨难写的一道


In the era of rapid development of technology leading to globalization,there is a decline of rituals and ceremonies which are one of the means of cultural identity（文化认同感的工具？，缺动词哈， the means of defining cultural identity）. In response to this issue, it is wise to give a full-sided consideration about the relation between rituals and cultural identity.
Admittedly, in to some extent, rituals and ceremonies represent a kind of cultural identity.(仪式典礼代表了一种文化身份认同？……不通吧) Firstly, rituals and ceremonies remind people of their national identity. An ample example(一个example怎么会ample啊？……) is the Spring Festival ceremony（？）which helpｓ define a kind of Chinese culture. On one hand, overseas　Chinese people use the ceremony to remind them who they are and what　they come from. On the other hand, domestic Chinese people view it as　a way to preserve their ancestors'　culture. Secondly, rituals and ceremonies  present a kind of religion　belief. Consider the case of Mid-Autumn Festival ceremony which stems　from the ancient religion. It is well acknowledged that by　implementing rituals and ceremonies people fulfill their religion　belief. Therefore rituals and ceremonies　reflect the value of culture.


1，这个，虽然我也想过把节日作为ｒｉｔｕａｌｓ　ａｎｄ　ｃｅｒｅｍｏｎｉｅｓ，但二者单从中文来看区别就很大吧…别混为一谈了…你看看ｗｉｋｉ里ｒｉｔｕａｌ的解释
2，而且，两个例子差不多同一类型。　中秋节跟宗教有关系么？吴刚嫦娥月兔是神话传说吧……traditional folk tales. 要举宗教最好不要举中国……
3，
“我们必须承认。在一定程度上仪式和典礼代表了一种文化认同。第一，仪式和典礼提醒人们他们的政治身份。一个充足的例子是春节典礼，它帮助定义了一种中国文化。一方面，海外华人利用这个典礼来提醒他们自己是谁，从哪里来，另一方面，国内华人讲它看作保留他们古老文化的一种方法。…………”建议你自己把文章翻译成中文看一下……

Although rituals and ceremonies are a kind of cultural representation in most cases, there is trend that rituals and ceremonies lose the meaning behind them due to globalization. An striking illustration（幻象？） is the celebration of  Saint Valentine's Day. In China, there a growing number of people who celebrate the non-official holiday without knowing the implication of the day and its cultural value. The case demonstrates the paradox that on one hand, more and more people conduct some ceremonies; on other hand, the implication of ceremonies become less known. Hence, in some case, rituals and ceremonies losetheir cultural meaning.
……“有一种趋势是仪式和典礼渐渐在全球化的背景下失去了内在含义”，论点有的，
但例子又是节日……1，本来就不大恰当，2，跟上一段重复

In addition, rituals and ceremonies is not the only way to define culture. Language and ethic can distinguish people from different cultures. In language, although nowadays many people become multilingual, the cultural background behind language makes a difference between native speakers and foreigners. Even in the same nation, dialect distinguishes people from different location where people have different subculture and tradition. Moreover, the value of ethic exerts significant impact on our culture and nation. For instance, the value of Confucianism plays a profound role in Chinese culture and affects many generation of Chinese people.
题目没说rituals and ceremonies是only way to define culture，你是受了北美范文影响吧……你说其他东西也定义文化，跟题目不冲突啊。背后要说的话应该是：“虽然仪式和典礼定义文化，但缺乏仪式和典礼的地方的确人们
是/否
有更低的认同感”。这才是回应题目的第二句。而这个论点应该是“虽然仪式和典礼定义文化，但缺乏仪式和典礼的地方还有其他的因素在定义文化，所以人们不一定有更低的认同感。”

北美那人好多审题都不大对
To sum up, without some exception, rituals and ceremonies in most cases represent the uniqueness of culture and nation identity. However, they are not the only way to define culture and there are many of other factors such as language and ethic contributed to cultural identity.

整体来讲，还是论证弱了点，正面回应题目的只有第二段，而且感觉在对rituals and ceremonies的理解上极不恰当。建议试试重定义。