寻找共同进行AW最后一月冲刺的童鞋~最好是四月二十号之后的

ivyleaf1988UID: 2609664

本人4月27号考作文，准备的比较早，目前issue，argu各写了大概二十篇左右，之前先后加入了三个作文小组，一个小组效率很高但是其他组员考完了，另外两个小组效率不高，作业批改不及时。目前还有一个之前小组的研究生童鞋，我两想再寻找两位成员进行最后冲刺，我们小组强度一般，注重效率和质量~

如果有童鞋已经准备了一段时间作文，对issue和argu都有了比较详细的了解，也是四月下旬考试，并且愿意共同进行冲刺的，欢迎加入！呵呵，条件有点多，那也是为了提高效率嘛~
QQ群101894266，加时注明考试时间

chzhzyxUID: 2745930

我跟楼主时间一样，不过我的进度比楼主慢，跟AW磨合了十天了，昨天只写了一篇issue。不知道讨论组可不可以加我啊

monkeybiaoUID: 2527713

我想加入！我是4月21日！

番茄斗斗UID: 2720914

4月22的飘过～～

然然八戒UID: 2763558

我是4月23号的，。。。和楼主的进度。。。argument写了三四篇，现在正在摸ISSUE，还没有上手，刚写了两篇今天下午给憋出来的。不知道讨论组愿不愿意有我的加入啊，现在每天都在看作文的说  qq:814558606

然然八戒UID: 2763558

附上arg习作一篇。。。楼主看能合格否。。。

argument35

"Salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, a medicine used to treat headaches. Although many foods are naturally rich in salicylates, for the past several decades food-processing companies have also been adding salicylates to foods as preservatives. This rise in the commercial use of salicylates has been found to correlate with a steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in our twenty-year study. Recently, food-processing companies have found that salicylates can also be used as flavor additives for foods. With this new use for salicylates, we can expect a continued steady decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia."


The author indicates that a stable decline in the number of headaches suffered by the average citizen of Mentia will continue since the commercial use of salicylates, which are of the same chemical family as aspirin, is increasing these years. To support that, a comparison between the rise of the use of salicylates in food and the decline in the average number of headaches sufferers is offered. The whole argument seems logical at first glance but flawed in several critical respects. Moreover, a blind confidence in salicylates' capability to heal headache might lead to a financial and psychological dependence , and even some unexpected consequences.

First of all, the whole passage is based on the assumption that salicylates can also treat headaches . Since salicylates are members of the same chemical family as aspirin, there may be some similar ingredients that can bring out the same chemical function. But the author provides no clear evidence to justify that. Thus, leaves the basic assumption unconvincing.

Secondly, the survey reflected about the steady decline in the average number of headaches reported by participants in the twenty-year study is not reliable. The author fails to explicit the clear amount of the respondents. Thus, without evidence that the respondents are representative of those of the overall population, it is too hasty to draw any conclusion about the reliability of the decline. Therefore, to convince me, the author needs to provide more specific statistics about the survey such as the amount of the samples and the age period.

Thirdly, even if the salicylates, used as preservatives, can really help to decline the headaches sufferers, and the statistics of the number of headaches suffered by the average citizens of Mentia is true and representative, it doesn't mean that it is the salicylates which lead to the decline of the headaches sufferers. They might have correlation, but the author provides no evidence to prove that they have cause and consequence relation. Meanwhile, for the author fails to substantiate this with more clear detailed information, it might entirely possible that there can be other alternatives which can affect or explain the decline in the number of headaches sufferers. For example, the patients might have taken other medications to treat the headache, or regular exercises and less pressure in work can result in lysis. The author should offer more long-term survey reports regarding the changing in the sufferers’ headache symptoms accord with their ingestion of salicylate-adding foods, on the condition that they are of similar symptom.

Finally, even if salicylates are the cause of the steady decline in the number of the headaches suffered, the new use of salicylates as flavor additives in foods cannot be treated as a useful mean to heal headache for granted. Even if the assumption is feasible, the author still overlooks the negative effect of the increasing use of salicylates as preservatives. The over use of preservatives may lead to many more severe diseases, such as cancer.

In sum, the whole argument is well-presented but not well-reasoned. In order to reassess this, a further survey and much more clear information of the accurate amount of the headaches sufferers in Mentia is necessary, as well as the changes appear with their increasing use of food contains more salicylates than natural ones do. Without such significant information substantiated, a blind confidence and psychological dependence on salicylates to treat headache might lead to a purposeless increase in the consumption of salicylates-adding foods, or even severer healthy consequences.