独立作文 by Jane

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

Teachers should not show their political or social views in the classroom





   In my opinion, showing teachers' personal political or social views to the students is not available. There are many reasons listing following.



   First, the task of teachers is helping students to learn knowledge in the textbooks or other books, but not to state their own ideas about politics or society. If teachers always tell students something about politics in the classroom , it would be a waste of time to students. As teachers ought to teach them knowledge about science or art and so on , instead of filling them with his personal ideas in aspect of political or society. From this angle, teachers should take the subject they teach as the first place in the classroom, but not other things.

   Moreover, people is always emotional. That is , when teachers state their political or social views, they often bring with much individual factors, such as the party which they support. For example, if a teacher support the Democratic Party. Maybe she or he is just a member of Democratic Party, then the teacher would approve the views which is helpful to their party. It is possible that these views are not enough objective to public. And the students don't have enough experience to judge if the opinions of teachers are right. They would possible take these views as truth. In this way, teachers may misguide students in many aspects.


   However, in some occasions, teachers could sometimes show their personal ideas as if the subjects they teach need. For example, political teacher.



  In a word, considering many factors, teachers had better not show their political or social views in the classroom. If they do this, they may not accomplish their subject tasks, therefore, students can't get their knowledge acquired. In another situation, the teachers may misguide students in social or political aspects, as the students could take the teachers' opinion as truth.

dphenixyUID: 2657199

In my opinion, showing teachers' personal political or social views to the students is not available（这个词不太合适吧，是想说advisable吗）. There are many reasons listing following.第一段观点很明确，这点很好，但有点短，前面可以加一两句废话^_^。
   First, the task of teachers is helping students to （可以去掉）learn knowledge in the textbooks or other books（去掉）, but not to（rather than感觉更好点） state their own ideas about politics or society. If teachers always tell students something about politics in the classroom , it would be a waste of time to students. As teachers ought to teach them knowledge about science or art and so on , instead of filling(distilling好点) them with his personal ideas in aspect of political or society. From this angle, teachers should take the subject they teach as the first place in the classroom, but not other things..

   Moreover, people is always emotional. That is , when teachers state their political or social views, they often bring with much（many）individual factors, such as the party which they support. For example, if a teacher support the Democratic Party. Maybe she or he is just a member of Democratic Party,（这句可以去掉） then the teacher would approve the views which is （注意前后一致）helpful to their party. It is possible that these views are not enough objective to public. And the students don't have enough experience to judge if the opinions of teachers are right. They would possible（possibly）
take these views as truth. In this way, teachers may misguide students in many aspects.


   However, in some occasions, teachers could sometimes show their personal ideas as if the subjects they teach need. For example, political teacher.这段可以去掉


In a word, considering many factors, teachers had better not show their political or social views in the classroom. If they do this, they may not accomplish their subject tasks, therefore,（therefore是副词不能直接连接句子） students can't get their knowledge acquired. In another situation, the teachers may misguide students in social or political aspects, as the students could take the teachers' opinion as truth.


结构和例子没什么问题，错误也很少，但感觉句式词汇的丰富程度还不够，另外感觉有的句子读起来不是很地道，虽然也说不出什么错误。建议多积累一些高级的词汇、句式和地道的表达，这样文章就能更好了，加油~

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

修改版1

谢谢dphenixy，说的很对，我的句型确实积累的很少，写作文的时候深切的感觉到了，而且总有Chinglish的感觉...


In my opinion, showing teachers' personal political or social views to the students is not reasonable. There are many reasons listing following.   

First, the task of teachers is helping students learn knowledge in the textbooks or other books , rather than state their own ideas about politics or society. If teachers always tell students something about politics in the classroom , it would be a waste of time to students. As teachers ought to teach them knowledge about science or art and so on , instead of infusing them with his personal ideas in aspect of political or society. From this angle, teachers should take the subject they teach as the first place in the classroom, but not other things.
   Moreover, people is always emotional. That is , when teachers state their political or social views, they often bring with many individual factors, such as the party which they support. For example, if a teacher support the Democratic Party,  then the teacher would approve the views which are only helpful to their party. It is possible that these views are not enough objective to the public. And the students don't have enough experience to judge if the opinions of teachers are right. They would possibly take these views as truth without any doubt. In this way, teachers may misguide students in many aspects, such as the view of value.

   In a word, considering many factors, teachers had better not show their political or social views in the classroom. If they do this, they may not accomplish their subject tasks. Therefore, students can't get their knowledge acquired. In another situation, the teachers may misguide students in social or political aspects, as the students could take the teachers' opinion as truth.

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

3.26作文

For successful development of a country, should a government focus its budget more on very young children education rather than on universities?

As it's well known that education is very important to a country. Deng Xiaoping once said education could lead the country to be strong . I take the view that government should not focus its buddget more on very younge children education rather than on universities for successful development of a country.

First, there is no doubt that university is a place which provides essential education to students. Many people learn skills to begin their career in the university. And many vital researchs also set up in universities, these researchs include many aspects of our life, such as environment, medical science, and so on. If the govenment don't give finacial aids to these reserches, they may can not continue. However, the very young education doesn't have these research .

Second, usually universities need more money to supply modern machines for students' study. For instance, computers. Nowadays, computers are popular and necessary in students' life and study in universities. Students can't image how they search information without computers connecting the Internet. In this angle, universities should provide computers to make the students learn conveniently. Nevertheless, there is no need to give very young children computers, as they can't use computers to learn. Most of the time, they listen to their teachers to get new knowledge.

Moreover, not only computers, but many other machines universities ought to have to let stuents study more easier , such as projector, which is vital for teachers to play powerpoint or other media profiles to accomplish their teaching.

In a word, the government should focus its budget more on universities rather than very young education, because universities use money in many ways, such as reseaches, teaching machines, and so on.

chailybaiUID: 2741896

In my opinion, showing teachers' personal political or social views to the students is not reasonable. There are many reasons listing following. （这里改成There are many reasons listed as the followings吧，我感觉是有点语法错误。。）  

First, the task of teachers is helping students learn knowledge in the textbooks or other books , rather than state their own ideas about politics or society. If teachers always tell students something about politics in the classroom , it would be a waste of time to students. As teachers ought to teach them knowledge about science or art and so on , instead of infusing them with his personal ideas in aspect of political or society. （这段话我感觉就是基本在重复上一段话啊，和上一句话合并一下可以让句子的层次性更丰富一点，毕竟在IBT里长句更受赏识啊~~）From this angle, teachers should take the subject they teach as （at）the first place in the classroom, but not other things.
   Moreover, people is （are）always emotional （其实可以表达的更丰富一点，比如people are always featured as emotional creatures.感觉太简单了）. That is , when teachers state their political or social views, they often bring with many individual factors（这里是想说主观因素吧，个人因素范围很广的，还有身体健康之类的，改成subjective factors好一点~~）, such as the party which they support. For example, if a teacher support the Democratic Party,  then the teacher would approve the views which are only helpful to their party. It is possible that these views are not enough objective（objective enough） to the public. And the students don't have enough experience to judge if the opinions of teachers are right. They would possibly take these views as truth without any doubt. In this way, teachers may misguide students in many aspects, such as the view of value.

   In a word, considering many factors, teachers had better not show their political or social views in the classroom. If they do this, they may not accomplish their subject tasks. Therefore, students can't get their knowledge acquired. In another situation(这个连词感觉用的不恰当啊，有转折的意思吧，用moreover，in addition之类的吧), the teachers may misguide students in social or political aspects, as the students could take the teachers' opinion as truth.

楼主的文章很有条理啊，逻辑结构蛮强，就是词汇和表达方式的积累感觉有点少。这篇文章里经常出现词和短语的重复运用，比如the teachers may misguide students in social or political aspects这句就出现了好几次。其实可以的话最好可以换一个种表达方式，比如lead the students to a wrong direction。。。不重复的表达方式才不会让人有审美疲劳吗~~建议楼主多积累一些同义词和句式的替换。总的来说还是不错的，加油吧~~

crazyluUID: 2628382

加油！！！！

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

3.29 作文


Some people think one's working is more important than being with one's famly.


Which is more important between family and working? Maybe there are different answers for different persons.In my opinion, I think both are very important.

  Our jobs help us to be economic  independent in the society. That is, if we don't have a job,  we can't earn us money that we need. In this case, we couldn't support ourselves without others' financial help.  Also, working makes us find our position and value in the world especially when we love our jobs very much. If that, we could have a lot of fun in our working, resulting in finding our personal value.


   Nowadays, workaholics are getting more and more under the huge competive pressure. They work and work no matter day and night, home and office, weekend and weekday. These persons may take a view that their working is more important than being with their family. It is possible that they  think their jobs are so important and interesting for themselves, so neglect their families in many aspects. For example, they should have been with their children in weekends as they once promised. Nevertheless, the result is job continuing.


  However, I don't think a person should work so crazy that he or she forget their families. We ought to balance family and working well. We, who have familes, could realize families are so vital to us . Family is our mental support in many aspects. Take myself as an example. I rely and need my families very much. When I'm down or high, I remember my Daddy and Mommy first. I  tell them my situations, my sadness, my happiness, and so on, and that  let me fell well. They often teach me a lot and give me advise in my life. I usually spend my weekends with them a lot.


  In a word, No matter family or working, they are both important to us. We had better balance the time with them well.

pochun111UID: 2608867

Some people think one's working is more important than being with one's famly.

Which is more important between family and working? Maybe there are different answers for(from) different persons去掉.In my opinion, I think both of themare very important.*
  Our jobs help us to be （achieve）economic  independent in the society. That is, if we don't have a job,  we can't earn us money that we need. In this case, we couldn't support ourselves without others' financial help.  Also, working makes us find our position and value in the world especially when we love our jobs very much. If that, we could have a lot of fun in our working, resulting in 这个词一般用在导致某后果finding our personal value.3 P:

8 n: P, `. N6 L7 K. Q' ^   Nowadays, workaholics are getting more and more (the population of workaholic are increaing in an unbelievable rate)under the huge competive(competitive) pressure. They work and work (work ceaselessly)no matter day and night, home and office, weekend and weekday. These persons may take a view that their working is more important than being with their family. It is possible that they  think their jobs are so important and interesting for themselves, so(that) neglect their families in many aspects. For example, they should have been with their children in weekends as they once promised. Nevertheless, the result is job continuing."(they continuously work instead of playing with their children in weekends they have promised at once.)

However, I don't think a person should work so crazy that he or she forget their families. We ought to balance family and working well. We, who have familes, could realize families are so vital to us . Family is our mental support in many aspects. Take myself as an example. I rely and need my families very much. When I'm down or high,我不知道这个表达是不是口语化的那种 但感觉不是很舒服 I remember my Daddy and Mommy first. I  tell them my situations去掉, my sadness, my happiness, and so on, and that  let me fell well. They often teach me a lot and give me advise  advices in my life. I usually spend my weekends with them a lot.

  In a word, No matter family or working, they are both important to us. We had better balance the time with them well.(we should balance them in a modest way.)
一些表达不是很准确 但是论点和论述还是很明确的 多阅读和联系能很快弥补不足

syk1984720UID: 2605277

2010-03-29 修改 by syk1984720(贝)
修改见附件

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

3.29作文改后：

Some people think one's working is more important than being with one's famly.

Which is more important between family and working? It is possible that the answers vary with each individual. I consider that both of them are very important.
   Our jobs help us to achieve economic independence in the society. That is, if we don't have a job, we can't earn money we need. In this case, we couldn't support ourselves without others' financial help. Job could provide us material demand. Also, working makes us find our position and personal value in the world especially when we love our jobs very much. In that event, A lot of fun could be found during working, and job is a way to realize our personal value.  
   Nowadays, under the huge competitive pressure, the number of workaholics are increasing in an unbelievable rate . They work constantly no matter day and night, home and office, weekend and weekday. These persons may take a view that their working is more important than being with their family. They may think their jobs are so important and interesting for themselves, that neglect their families in many aspects. For example, They ceaselessly work on weekends instead of spending time companying with families as they once promised.
   However, I don't agree that a person should work so crazy that he or she forget their family. We ought to balance family and working well. We, who have familes, could realize families are extraordinarily vital to us .Family is our mental support in many aspects. Take myself as an example. I rely on and need my families very much. When I'm happy or sad, I remember my daddy and mommy first. I share them with my situations, my sadness, my happiness, and so on, which let me feel better. They often teach me a lot and give me advices in my life. I usually spend my weekends with them .  
  In a word,I consider that no matter family or working, they are both important to us. We should balance them in an appropriate way.

glly7UID: 2675646

前几天网络出现问题，我会尽快给你改了发过来，实在不还意思，见谅啊

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

The best way to travel is in a group led by a tour guide.


As for me, I am in favor of travelling by myself or with my friends or families, but not led by a tour guide.

No one can deny the fact that a guide would be more familiar with the places which we travel to. In this case, tour guide could lead us to some places relatively famous in his view.

However, It is possible that the place we want to go is not familiar to the tour guide, so that the guide may not  take us to these places. For example, one of my friends like book store very much. She thinks she could enjoy herself a lot in a book store. And no matter where she goes, she would go to the bookstores in that place. Last week, she travel to a beatific city, and was led by a tour guide, but she told me that  the guide did not take her to the book store she wanted to go. We, who heard about this, commonly accepted that's too bad for her to be led by a tour guide.

Moreover, the tour guide may arrange your schedule too close, even that you don't have time to relax yourself well in the journey. You just catch the schedule, which you really don't like. Taking one of my journey for instance, last year,I and my families went to HaiNan Island, which is a big island with a number of tourists, to take a vacation. We travelled with a tour guide, and the guide arranged the hurry journey. We had to get up 6.am. Only a little time we could spend in the beaches and other tourisms. And the tour guide often took us to some places for shopping, which we actually didn't need. The guider's purpose was making money, as if we could have bought things in the shop she pointed to. Consequently, it was not a pleasant journey because of the tour guide


I don't mean that is definitely bad with a tour guide as it is useful and pleasant for tourists led by a guide. Maybe tourists would not be lost with guide. but I just take the view that it's not the best way to travel with guide.

jack878UID: 2650029

4.7 revised by jack878

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

4.7 【修改版#1】

No one can deny the fact that a guide would be more familiar with the places which we travel to. In this case, tour guide could lead us to some places relatively famous in his view, and make us a more convenient trip since the time for researching tour sites would be saved.

However,it is possible that the place, where we want to go, is not familiar to the tour guide, so that the guide may not  take us to these places. Usually guides take us to the tour sites he or she is familiar with. For example, one of my friends likes book store very much, because she maintains that she could enjoy herself a lot in a book store. And no matter where she goes, she would go to the bookstores in that place. Last week, she traveledl to a beautiful city, and led by a tour guide.She asked the guide to take her to the book store which she wanted to go. Unfortunately, the guide told her that she seldom went to the book store. Therefore, guide couldn't be provided to my friend. We, who heard about this, commonly accepted that's too bad for her to be led by a such tour guide.

Moreover, the tour guide may arrange your schedule too tight, accordingly, you may not have time to relax yourself and enjoy the journey with a good mood. You just catch the schedule, which you really don't like, made by the guide. Taking one of my journey for instance, last year, my families and I went to HaiNan Island, which is a big island with a number of tourists to take a vacation. We travelled with a tour guide, and the guide manipulate the whole hurry journey. We had to get up 6.am. Only a little time could we spent in the beaches and other tour sites. In addition, the tour guide often took us to some places for shopping, which we actually didn't need. Purpose of the guide was earning money, as if we could have bought goods in the shop she pointed to us. Consequently, it was not a pleasant journey because of the tour guide.

In a word, From what has been discussing above, I am fully convinced that travelling alone without a guide is a better way for us.I don't mean that is definitely bad with a tour guide as it is useful and pleasant for tourists led by a guide. Maybe tourists would not be lost with guide. but I just take the view that it's not the best way to travel with guide.

zhezhe1011UID: 2656203

4.8作文

Human needs for farmland, housing, and industry are more important than saving land for endangered animals.

Nowadays with the expedite development of human life and poplulation in increaing number, some people want to adjust a large amount of land to farmland. In their opinion, farmland for housing and industry play a more essencial role than endangered animals. However, I maintain that they are both important for us human being.

In the first place, it's undisputable that housing and industry benefits our life a lot in many ways. We can't image the situation that industry are stopped or houses are not enough for the increasing number of people, since industry and housing are our basical life facilities.
For example, the electronic fatory are resource of electronic at home or school or many other places. Stopping industry like electronic factory would cause a panic in public. Also farmland is essencial for us as we have to eat everyday. Consequently, housing, industry are indispensable part of our life.

Moreover, endangered animals also need land where they could live. More and more animals are becoming endangered in recent days as their habit environment has been destroyed by human. It's generally accepted that animals are important to keep a ecological balance in our world. Furthermore, animals' dying out may cause a lot of serious problem, which we even can't predict now, to our human beings. Accordingly,  the animals, which is bound to die out, should be protected well by providing them a comfortable environment to live in.


To sum up, from what has been discussed above, I am fully convinced that the importance of housing and industry equates with providing areas for endangered animals. Both of them do a favor to make our huaman being live a better or more consistent life .