【神话杀G组】【精品作业】Argument4-欢迎评改^_^

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No.8 木木之大作


ARGUMENT-4


Thefollowing was posted on an Internet real estate discussion site.
"Of the two leading real estate firms in our town-Adams Realty andFitch Realty-Adams is clearly superior. Adams has 40 real estate agents. Incontrast, Fitch has 25, many of whom work only part-time. Moreover, Adams' revenue last year was twice as high as that ofFitch, and included home sales that averaged $168,000, compared to Fitch's$144,000. Homes listed with Adams sell faster as well: ten years ago, I listedmy home with Fitch and it took more than four months to sell; last year, when Isold another home, I listed it with Adams, andit took only one month. Thus, if you want to sell your home quickly and at agood price, you should use Adams."



提纲：
1.论断提供的证据不足以说明A更好。年收入高，但员工多，成本也高，平均下来很可能工作效率低。
2.十年前和一年的市场会有很大变化，而且两处房产的情况是否相同也没有提及。
3.论断很武断。找好的代理公司并一定能保证卖房快，房价好。房子本身的特点是最重要的。
结论：论断看起来似乎很有条理，证据也很多。但结论却很武断，也很不公平。要评价两家公司的业绩，除了年收外还应该包括很多内容比如工作效率，对市场的了解等等。而要想更快更好地卖出房子，不仅要找一个合适的房产公司，还需要给自己的房子定好位。


In this argument,the author tries to prove that Fitch Realty is much better than Adams Realty inselling houses. To substantiate this point of view, the author provided asurvey result which indicates Adams’ high performanceno matter from the number of real estate agents or the average revenue in lastyear. Moreover, the author also took himself for example that Adamssells faster. Although many evidences are provided, the author still omittedsome details that would make the argument convincing. These flaws can be deeplyanalyzed as follows.


The evidences theauthor provided are insufficient to support his standpoint. Only the number ofthe real estate agents can not illuminate the strength of the companyobviously. On the contrary, less employees may indicate their efficiency while40 employees may show Adams’ managementproblems because more agents means more labor cost. We could not get any informationabout the agents’ necessity in each company from the argument. Additionally, thedifference between the two companies’ revenue rather than profit makes theconclusion doubtable. As we all know, the profit is related to revenue andfinal cost while the cost is not mentioned at all. Though the Adams’average revenue is higher than that of Fitch, the profit may be lower when takingthe labor cost as well as other costs into consideration. From these aspects,we need more convincing data and evidences.


The author alsocited the example of himself to prove that Adamssells houses faster. But the example seems appealing at first glance but omitsso much detail from my perspective. The time between the author sold his twohomes is as long as ten years that every thing may happen in such a longperiod. Ten years ago, the population amount in the author’s town may be notvery large which made his home disengaged
for severalmonths. But things may have changed now. More people mean more demands in houseliving. Besides the population change through these years, the differencesbetween these two houses are not mentioned at all. The place at where the houselocated and the condition of the house itself are vital factors that woulddecide whether it would go down well with bidders. Again, these kinds of evidencesare deficient in the argument.


In summary, theargument is unconvincing as it stands. To make it more logically acceptable,the author has to make more investigation on two companies such as theefficiency of agents, the acquaintance about the house market. Only giving morefactors motioned above, would it be more thorough and logically convincing.



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