Mr.Four's Writing作业小贴

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

Teachers should not make their social or political view known to students, do you agree or not, explain why.（09.03.27）

Teachers' duty is teaching students knowledge.
Besides this, teachers should prepare students virtues and integrity. Teachers present their social or political viewpoint to students at class. But, I think, there is no need to convey the social or political viewpoint when teachers are teaching their students. There are several reasons for my opinions.


First of all, teachers should make rooms for students having independent thinking in politics. Students receive much political knowledge from teachers at class, and receive it from the newspaper or other media in society. They can form their social or political viewpoint independently. If teachers show their political standpoint in class, they will make influence on students who are forming their own political view by their selves. For example, the teacher conveys that he/she supports one party, and says something about the party in class. Students will get more information about that party which the teacher says in class, and accept the view of the party unconsciously. Thus, students will lose the chance for independent thinking.


Furthermore, the political knowledge that taught by teachers in class must be objective.
If teachers make their social or political standpoint known to students, there is something individual subjective with the political knowledge. Therefore, that will effect students gaining the objective knowledge from teachers.


Finally, some students have had their political viewpoint by their selves, because of the political information from TV programs, radio, newspaper, and internet. So, there may be a conflict between the political view of teachers and it of those students who had their own political view. For example, the students may be contrast to teachers, and refuse to accept teachers' teaching.
Badly, that will cause violent confrontations in campus.



In sum, there are some disadvantages on that teachers make their standpoint known to students. In my opinion, teachers should remain neutral when they are teaching students at class.

伶女UID: 2797207

6.15 feedback by 伶女 Teachers' duty is teaching students knowledge. Besides this, teachers should prepare students virtues and integrity这种说法很怪。。。. Teachers present their social or political viewpoint to students at class.前面两句应该有个连接词表示两句之间的承接或递进关系，这样摆着很零散。 But, I think, there is no need to convey the social or political viewpoint when teachers are teaching their students. There are several reasons for my opinions. therebe句型本来就是不到最后关头不要用的好，同学还连着用了两个。。。后面那句的说法很多啊，比如my personal reasons are presented as fellows, 或直接连for the reasons below. First of all, teachers should make rooms for students having这里用to do比doing好些吧，不过have thinking这种说话中文的感觉 independent thinking in politics. Students receive much political knowledge from teachers at class, and receive it from the newspaper or other media in society. （这句可以改成Students receive political knowledge not only from teachers in class but also from newspaper and other media in society）They can form their social or political viewpoint independently. If teachers show their political standpoint in class, they will make influence on students who are forming their own political view by their selves（themselves）. For example, the teacher conveys that he/she supports one party, and says something about the party in class. Students will get more information about that party which the teacher says in class, and accept the view of the party unconsciously. Thus, students will lose the chance for independent thinking.最后的例子陈述的有点口语化。 8 X) w; m2 E& `) E' F, r) Z2 _! `$ j Furthermore, the political knowledge that taught by teachers in class must be objective. If teachers make their social or political standpoint known to students, there is something individual（用personal感觉恰当一些） subjective with the political knowledge. Therefore, that will effect students gaining the objective knowledge from teachers.: ^1 `; ^% p& s, {6 Finally, some students have had their political viewpoint by their selves, because of the political information from TV programs, radio, newspaper, and internet. So, there may be a conflict between the political view of teachers and it of those students who had their own political view. For example, the students may be contrast to teachers, and refuse to accept teachers' teaching. Badly这样的用法没见过呢～, that will cause violent confrontations in campus. / Q, G! p6 t+ G! u  a  s1 [3 |   P7 h1 H  F: Q4 _ In sum, there are some disadvantages on that teachers make their standpoint known to students. In my opinion, teachers should remain neutral学习啦 when they are teaching students at（in） class. 总的来说句型有点单调（我也是这个毛病）有些地方用词口语了点，整体逻辑比较清楚 一起加油！

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

2# 伶女

收到评改的作文啦！！谢谢伶女！！谢谢！！

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

Do you think success is important, or it is more important to remain happy and optimistic when you fail?（09.03.21)

What asked about many people say that success is more important, but other people regard that keeping happy when failing is more important differently. However, I think I win myself at least when I still feel pleasant and hopeful after failing.


What is the definition of success? Having more money? Or gaining higher social status?
Everyone has different definitions of success, and wants to gain success. But, why do people want to succeed? I believe that they want to obtain not only the satisfaction of material but also of mental. On the other hand, I think it is the most important for people to get the content of spirit. For instance, someone achieved his/her aim, but he/she betrays his/her all friends, gives up the family, and loses personal trustworthiness. That is success but losing everything which he/she owns. It is meaningless to have that success. If that, I prefer to fail.


Moreover, it will succeed next time, if people can keep happy and optimistic when they fail. Because it is easier to find the reason of making mistakes and to correct it by keeping good state of mind after failing. There is an adage-- Only left with the opportunity to prepare the people! People cannot succeed last time because of lacking preparation. When they are ready for that, they must succeed.


Finally, no matter what the result of the competition is, the winner is the one who has courage to challenge himself/herself. So, it is no need to depress when you don't success. Because you have been a winner who engaged the competition.

Obviously, all the analysis points to a sound conclusion that keeping happy and optimistic when failing is more important than success.

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement:
It is better to spend money on traveling and vacation than to save money for the future?(09.03.14)

When asked about the use of money, the majority of people believe that depositing money for the future is a good choice, but other people regard that it is better to go to the expense of traveling and vacation differently. However, in my viewpoint, I think that it is fit for me to spend money on traveling. Because people can reap the benefit of traveling and vacation.


Firstly, with the development of the transportation, people are more and more convenient to travel, and more and more people choose going out for a trip on vacation. Thus, I can meet peoples from many other countries, and make friends with them. For example, I met a Indian guy in summer vacation when I travelled to Hong Kong. We became friends, talked to each other and shared our experience of life. I knew more about Indian tradition and life style. So I can gain more interesting experience from traveling.


Furthermore, traveling can make people feel relax, and release their pressure from work. Peoples who work in a city, have much more pressure in daily life. Even on weekend, they cannot have a rest either. For mentally and physically healthy, traveling is a good choice to relax.


As far as we known, saving money for the future sounds a good idea, but I believe that peoples enjoy their life after satisfying material life. Actually, the future can be planed but cannot be confirmed. And financial plan is a long term plan, not a one-off plan. I also suggest that traveling can make my future more excellent.



Because of all above reasons, I agree the viewpoint that spending money on traveling is better than saving money for the future.

远远在笑UID: 2742022

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement:
It is better to spend money on traveling and vacation than to save money for the future?(09.03.14)

彩色修改见附件。


When(whenever怎么样？)
asked about the use of money, the majority of people believe that depositing money for the future is a good choice, but other people regard(这里用regard不好吧，直接用consider或者think) that it is better to go to the expense of traveling and vacation differently.（没有理解，我的理解能力还需加强）
However,
（删去）in（from） my viewpoint, I think that it is fit for me to spend money on traveling. Because people can reap the benefit of
（不如说from） traveling and vacation.


Firstly（...用在TOEFL的考试中不太合适吧...）, with the development of the transportation, people are more and more convenient to travel,（.......It has been more and more convenient for people to travel） and more and more people choose going out for a trip on vacation.（删） Thus, I（前文哪里提到我了？改成people）
can meet peoples（people用作复数的意思是民族）from many other countries, and make friends with them. For example, I met a（an）
Indian guy in summer vacation when I travelled to Hong Kong. We became friends, talked to each other and shared our experience of life.（As a result） Iknew more about Indian tradition and life style. So I can gain more interesting experience from traveling.  ~- O+ U3 r% `' C
2 A; ?* _5 H3 N, Q# D, Z

Furthermore, traveling can make people feel relax, and release their pressure from work. Peoples who work in a city,（删去）
have much more（和谁比？） pressure in daily life. Even at！ weekend, they cannot have a rest either. For mentally and physically（mental and physical）
healthy（health）, traveling is a good choice to relax.（删去）


As far as we known,（.......真的不理解） saving money for the future sounds
like a good idea, but I believe that peoples（民族...） enjoy their life（一条命?）
after satisfying material life.(是不是满足了物质生活之后...读不下去，请重新组织) Actually, the future can be planed but cannot be confirmed. And financial plan is a long term plan, not a one-off plan. I also suggest that traveling can make my future more excellent.（对于这段很无语，不知所云啊）


Because of all above reasons,（As a conclusion，简洁大方） I agree the viewpoint that spending money on traveling is better than saving money for the future.

多多练习句子的组织和词汇的运用。

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

谢谢批改和提出意见！感谢啊！

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

Sometimes, if you cannot say anything nice to someone, you should say nothing at all.(09.03.13北美)

What should you do if you find nothing nice to say to someone? Some people would believe that they had better say nothing at all, while others prefer to continue to say something to break silence whatever that is bad or not. In my point of view, I think I should say something that is not relative to each other, such as the news, the weather, the view and so on.


First of all, I believe that people's attitude is an important thing when they communicate with others in social occasions. Because people's behavior and talking can reflect their attitude, and the other side can understand their purposes by their attitudes. Such as, people say nothing at all to the other side because they have nothing nice to say. The other sides think that they don't want to go on communicating, and have a negative impression on them.



Furthermore, I think that people cannot say anything bad to someone no matter they have nothing nice to say or not. On account of saying anything bad, it is a so great negative influence on communicating with others. For example, others consider they are not respecting them, and stop the talking between them. Although their bad speaking is not deliberate, others regard people's speaking as an infantile behavior.


From what has been discussed above, I believe that both saying nothing at all and saying anything bad are not a good choice. In social occasion, no need to say anything related to each other. For keeping on communicating and attracting others, people can say something which is not related to each other. It is a good choice to talk about recent popular topic, because it is easy to make the air relaxed and make the other side interested in it.

ilnlhUID: 2641884

见附件

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

谢谢批改！！
9# ilnlh

ilnlhUID: 2641884

我的好像没有批改呢。。。
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1113750-1-1.html

Mr.fourUID: 2814685

09.02.27北美
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? A job with more vacation time is better than a job with high salary but less vacation time.


Up to the question that which is better, a job with more vacation time or with high salary but vacation time, people have diverse opinions about it. Some people think that a job with more vacation time is a good idea, while others suspect that a job with high salary but less vacation time is better. However, I prefer to a job with more vacation time because of several reasons.



Primarily, people can gain energy to work better after vacation. I believe that people feel tired and stressful for working long hours. It is detrimental to raise working efficiency if people cannot release their pressure from work. As we known, in some European countries, people have much vacation time. They have about three weeks vacation time in summer, but there is not negative influence on working efficiency. Mostly people work with superior diligence.


Subsequently, people know how to live with family better when they have more holidays. I think that people lose happy when they spend most of time on working. Because they have less time with family. There is a survey about people and family on famous website "sino". Over half of responders convey that they feel their life empty without their family.
They can make closer between their family by traveling or playing games with family on holiday time.


Furthermore, people can learn something new on vacation time. In my opinion, everyone should have life-long education. When people work for long hours, they are nothing but working in their mind. They are too busy to learn some new things that they are interested in. If people have more spare time, they can learn from traveling or some courses.


To summarize the reasons above, I consider that a job with more holiday time is better. People should make good use of vacation time to live better.


TOEFL writing-7.doc (27.5 KB, 下载次数: 5)

2010-6-24 22:13:46 上传

下载次数: 5

potpourriUID: 2834146

Up to the question that which is better, ajob with more vacation time or with high salary but vacation time, people havediverse opinions about it. Some people think that a job with more vacation timeis a good idea(good choice是不是更好？), while others suspect that a job with highsalary but less vacation time is better. However, I prefer to a job with morevacation time because of several reasons.



Primarily, people can gain energy towork better after vacation. I believe that people feel tired and stressful for（after）
working long hours. It is detrimental（好词！） toraise working efficiency if people cannot release their pressure from work. Aswe known, in some European countries, people have much vacation time. They haveabout three weeks vacation time in summer, but there is not negative influenceon working efficiency. Mostly people work with superior diligence. 我觉得例子不错



Subsequently, people know how to live withfamily better when they have more holidays. I think that people lose happy whenthey spend most of time on working. Because they have less time with family. （改成 spend too much time onworking and less on family如何？）There is a survey about people andfamily on famous website "sino"（我是小白，这是什么？要不要解释下其权威性？）. Over half of responders conveythat they feel their life empty without their family.
They can make closer（they can let the relationshipcloser或者直接说 improve relationship 更简洁）
betweentheir family by traveling or playing games with family on holiday time.


Furthermore, people can learnsomething new on vacation time. In my opinion, everyone should have life-longeducation. When people work for long hours, they are nothing but working intheir mind. They are too busy to learn some new things that they are interestedin. If people have more spare time, they can learn from traveling or somecourses. 恩，这个观点不错，如果说的更具体就更好了！


To summarize the reasons above, Iconsider that a job with more holiday time is better. People should make gooduse of vacation time to live better.

结构清晰，例子恰当，学习~~~

sunersunUID: 2734987

这是我改的，仅供参考