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[主题活动] [每日一题][ISSUE43][例子积累&讨论][20100713] [复制链接]

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Sagittarius射手座 AW活动特殊奖 AW作文修改奖 IBT Elegance 挑战ETS奖章 US Advisor US Assistant 荣誉版主

发表于 2010-7-13 09:34:41 |显示全部楼层
TODAY'S TOPIC

ISSUE43

To be an effective leader, a public official must maintain the highest ethical and moral standards.
  
要成为一个有效的领导,他必须具有最高的伦理和道德标准。


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说明:

例子积累&讨论在方式上和词句积累类似,每天都会有版主发出新的题目,同时为了抛砖引玉,会先贴一个例子来帮助大家熟悉

大家需要做的是,根据题目列出两到三个自己认为可以用的例子,并说明如何使用

需要注意的是:要争取尽量说清楚例子如何使用,这将从思维和方法上锻炼你的文章谋篇能力

关于例子积累应当关注的内容和意义,大家可以看一下这个帖子:https://bbs.gter.net/thread-959513-1-1.html

1010G 寄托AW版备考小组的版面活动具体内容介绍和安排:https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1119718-1-1.html

同时请注意,找例子和用例子之间还需要很多练习,需要注意一下一些关键信息:
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Use Evidence
1. Offer evidence that agrees with your stance up to a point, then add to it with ideas of your own.
2. Present evidence that contradicts your stance in order to argue against (refute) it and therefore strengthen your position
3. Use sources against each other, as if they are experts on a panel discussing your proposition
4. Use quotations to support your assertion, not merely to state or restate your claim. Weak and Strong Uses of Evidence

In order to use evidence effectively, you need to integrate it smoothly into your paragraph:
1. State your claim.
2. Give your evidence, remembering to relate it to the claim.
3. Comment on the evidence to show how it supports the claim

1)Weak Use of Evidence
Today, we are too self-centered. Most families no longer sit down to eat together, preferring instead to eat on the go while rushing to the next appointment . Everything is about what we want
COMMENT:This is a weak example of evidence because the evidence is not related to the claim. What does the claim about self-centeredness have to do with families eating together? The writer doesn’t explain the connection.
The same evidence, however, can be used to support the same claim, but only with the addition of a clear connection between claim and evidence, and some analysis of the quotation's content

2)Stronger Use of Evidence
Today, Americans are too self-centered. Even our families don't matter as much anymore as they once did. Other people and activities take precedence. In fact, the evidence shows that most American families no longer eat together, preferring instead to eat on the go while rushing to the next appointment. Sit-down meals are a time to share and connect with others; however, that connection has become less valued, as families begin to prize individual activities over shared time, promoting self-centeredness over group identity.
COMMENT:This is a far better example, as the evidence is more smoothly integrated into the text, the link between the claim and the evidence is strengthened, and the evidence itself is analyzed to provide support for the claim
Discussing your evidence’s significance develops and expands a paper,Remember that your job during the course of your essay is to persuade your readers that your claims are feasible and the most effective way of interpreting the evidence

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Sagittarius射手座 AW活动特殊奖 AW作文修改奖 IBT Elegance 挑战ETS奖章 US Advisor US Assistant 荣誉版主

发表于 2010-7-13 09:37:36 |显示全部楼层
参看下帖例子部分:

0910AW SPECTACULAR之【同主题写作】第十二期 Issue43 effective& moral
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-988726-1-1.html

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RE: [每日一题][ISSUE43][例子积累&讨论][20100713] [修改]

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