A99吕

huashiyiqikeUID: 2674177

吕男的习作 终于过400了哇哈哈
it is necessary to stress the importance of a practical attitude of life in the increasingly competitive society, and in some realm where the competition is extremely fierce, this attitude can be vital to fulfilling some kind of
achievements. despite of this, a completely practical point of view may bring about counterproductive results. in fact, even though we come to realize that pragmatic means a lot in the modern society, the importance地位 of idealistic view can never be overrated.
we cannot deny that pragmatic behavior contributes to survival in most areas. it can be simply put by
the greatest biologist Darwin's evolution theory: only the strong can survive.(survival of the fittest)
in the business realm, the company that functions
better can cause its competitors to go to bankrupt; in the academic realm, only the qualified paper can be published in the key editorial, which can setthe researcher apart or even lead him or her
to win the Nobel Prize; in politics, the candidate who has most votes wins;

even in this exam, we can never dream of a high score, but to type word by word. nowadays it seems that where there is people, there is competition, and in face of competition, taking a practical attitude
is afterall positive, because it
is better than daydreaming or do nothing at all. we cannot assure success by just taking a practical attitude, but without such an attitude
in face of competition surely lead to nothing.
However, we cannot therefore conclude that pragmatic behavior is completely right. a careful reflection will reveal the fact that an extremely practical attitude can end up in misconduct. the Watergate affair, Clinton's scandal or economic crisis can illustrate this. if we are captivated by our selfish nature, we are more likely to ignore the moral restriction, and thus making great mistakes that can never be forgiven.
on the other hand, idealistic can be the backbone of human race. just as a famous writer says: man without ideal is no more than animal. in the ancient time, when to live is the best wish, the caveman dreamed of flying freely like birds. generation by generation, we people can in the end fly even higher and faster than birds in airplanes. the idea of flying at ancient time is everything but not practical issue. it is because of the sustained dream that we human can work wonders. in the long run, it is idealistic view counts rather than practical view.
in the area of art, idealistic view is more essential than practical view. while competition may exists, the soul-striking music, poem, or painting cannot be produced by a mind considering nothing more than money or status.
to sum up, idealistic view and practical view are all important for human race, and neither
can be over-emphasized. the better way is to combine them both and call for a balance between them.
only by this way can modern people keep on creating wonders both in material field and in spiritual field.

ggjyUID: 2706471

it is necessary to stress the importance of a practical attitude of life in the increasingly competitive society, and in some realm where the competition is extremely fierce, this attitude can be vital to fulfilling some kind of achievements. despite of this, a completely practical point of view may bring about counterproductive results.in fact, even though we come to realize that pragmatic means a lot in the modern society, the importance地位 of idealistic view can never be overrated. 这段能看出你在努力讲清楚实用主义的重要性和理想主义不可缺少，但可能是红字里面你那些连词用的别扭，或者是限于第一段的字数和篇章分配，感觉红句部分说的不是很到位，逻辑过度不自然。     
we cannot deny that pragmatic behavior contributes to survival in most areas. it can be simply put by the greatest biologist Darwin's evolution theory: only the strong can survive.前面这个很好，论证的时候加名人理论辅助支持论点(survival of the fittest) in the business realm, the company that functions better can cause its competitors to go to bankrupt（太狠了，，，）; in the academic realm, only the qualified paper can be published in the key editorial, which can setthe researcher apart or even lead him or her to win the Nobel Prize; in politics, the candidate who has most votes wins; even in this exam, we can never dream of a high score, but to type word by word.前面排比用的很好。 nowadays it seems that where there is people, there is competition, 这个句子简单而且好用and in face of competition, taking a practical attitude is afterall positive, because it is better than daydreaming or do nothing at all这个就有点无力了.这里放一个连词可以，不然有些突兀 we cannot assure success by just taking a practical attitude, but without such an attitude in face of competition surely lead to nothing.
However, we cannot therefore conclude that pragmatic behavior is completely right. 我以为，不分正确和错误而是分程度和适用场合吧。a careful reflection will reveal the fact that an extremely practical attitude can end up in misconduct. the Watergate affair, Clinton's scandal or economic crisis can illustrate this. if we are captivated by our selfish nature, we are more likely to ignore the moral restriction, and thus making great mistakes that can never be forgiven. 这段在论证的时候可以点一下题目最后那句关于实用主义所对应的简单直接的选择的问题深化一下论证和题目的联系。这段再改改就更好了。例子举得挺典型的。
         on the other hand, idealistic can be the backbone of human race. just as a famous writer says: man without ideal is no more than animal. 呵呵in the ancient time, when to live is the best wish, the caveman dreamed of flying freely like birds. generation by generation, we people can in the end fly even higher and faster than birds in airplanes. the idea of flying at ancient time is everything but not practical issue. it is because of the sustained dream that we human can work wonders. in the long run, it is idealistic view counts rather than practical view. 上面那个思考方式挺好。前人的空想可以转化为后人的实践。以发展的眼光看问题。不错。
in the area of art, idealistic view is more essential than practical view. while competition may exists, the soul-striking music, poem, or painting cannot be produced by a mind considering nothing more than money or status.
          to sum up, idealistic view and practical view are all important for human race, and neither
can be over-emphasized. the better way is to combine them both and call for a balance between them.
only by this way can modern people keep on creating wonders both in material field and in spiritual field恩。最后用不用再多说点？
总体来说不错的！不知道我的分析你满意么？