欢迎拍 argument 187

crazyjooUID: 2805124

TOPIC: ARGUMENT189 - The following is a recommendation from the dean at Foley College, a small liberal arts college, to the president of the college.

"Since college-bound students are increasingly concerned about job prospects after graduation, Foley College should attempt to increase enrollment by promising to find its students jobs after they graduate. Many administrators feel that this strategy is a way for Foley to compete against larger and more prestigious schools and to encourage students to begin preparing for careers as soon as they enter college. Furthermore, a student who must choose a career path within his or her first year of college and who is guaranteed a job after graduation is more likely to successfully complete the coursework that will prepare him or her for the future."
WORDS: 515
TIME: 00:44:00
DATE: 2010-7-27 19:44:11



The arguer recommends all people in the United States to eat more fish in order to keep depression far away from themselves. To make it more substantiated, the arguer points out the fact that our ancestors eat less saturated fat and thus were much less likely to suffer from depression than today's people. In addition, the arguer render that residents in Japan and Taiwan also get similar benefits from large consumption of fish. However, this argument suffers from several flaws.


Firstly, the arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between omega -3 fatty acids and less possibility to suffer from depression. The number of scientists who approve such a relationship is small. Thus, it is tempting to think that this recently result of study is not publicly acceptable and thus invalid to some extend. In addition, less opportunity to get depression may be not only attributable to Omega -3 fatty acids. A myriad of other factors may affect depression, such as genetics, eating habit, mental pressure and so forth. Without ruling these and other possibilities, the arguer cannot justifiably claim that there is a close connection between depression and omega -3 fatty acids.



Secondly, even if omega -3 fatty acids do lead to the decrease possibility of depression, the arguer cannot presumptuously assume that larger consumption of fish will work effectively like omega -3 fatty acids in the prevention of depression.
In fact omega -3 fatty acids are only found in some fishes and fish oils and not kinds of fish contain such elements. In this respect, the arguer's suggestion is irresponsible because it make sway people to buy fishes which contain nothing valuable to them.


Finally, the arguer commits a false analogy by falsely assuming that there are not differences between our ancestors, the residents in Japan and Taiwan and people living in United States. Even we accepted the idea from those two scientists, the arguer cannot conclude that we will gain similar benefits from omega -3 fatty acids as our ancestors and Asian people do. In fact, people from different period and regions have all kinds of difference, such as eating habit, living environment and system of digestion. Perhaps our ancestors can absorb omega -3 fatty acids more easily than us since they used to have raw meats and it is understandable that they have stronger system of digestion. Or perhaps Asian people cook fish in a completely different way from American, and the Asian way might be able to retain much omega -3 fatty acids in dishes while the American way do not.



To sum up, the argument is well present, but not thoroughly reasoned. To make it more logically acceptable, the arguer has to provide more detailed information the scientific study to convince us that omega -3 fatty acids and depression connects tightly. Moreover, the arguer can enhance the validity of his argument by proving that American can get similar benefit from omega -3 fatty acids. And the arguer's recommendation would be more endearing and acceptable if he points out that which kinds of fish contain most omega -3 fatty acids.

没看题直接限时。。结果悲剧。感觉攻击顺序很不明确。。脑子很乱。连2个科学家都没看到。。感觉过题库还是很重要的啊。。

crazyjooUID: 2805124

觉得不好于是再来一次。不过正文第二个攻击点还是由于时间关系没展开。。

TOPIC: ARGUMENT187 - The following appeared as part of an article in a health magazine.
"A new discovery warrants a drastic change in the diets of people living in the United States. Two scientists have recently suggested that omega -3 fatty acids (found in some fish and fish oils) play a key role in mental health. Our ancestors, who ate less saturated fat and more polyunsaturated fat, including omega -3 fatty acids, were much less likely to suffer from depression than we are today. Moreover, modern societies-such as those in Japan and Taiwan-that consume large quantities of fish report depression rates lower than that in the United States. Given this link between omega -3 fatty acids and depression, it is important for all people in the United States to increase their consumption of fish in order to prevent depression."
WORDS: 488          TIME: 00:29:58          DATE: 2010-7-27 21:26:10
The arguer recommends that all people in the United States should eat more fish in order to prevent depression. To make it more substantiated, the arguer points out a recent scientific study and the fact that ancestors ingested more omega -3 fatty acids and hence suffered from depression. Moreover, the arguer render that residents in Asian societies which consume large amount of fish have less depression rates. However, this argument suffers from several flaws.

Firstly, the arguer fails to take into consideration other factors which might keep out ancestors far away from depression. Our ancestors and people living in the modern cities have all kinds of difference, such as eating habit and living enviroment. Perhaps our ancestors can tend to like have some food which help low the depression rate and are uncommon in the diet of a modern American.Or perhaps our ancestors did not have to withstand high pressure from competition as modern people. Moreover, they can breath fresher air and eat healtheir food. All in all, without ruling out these and other possibilities, it is unreasonable to conclude that omega -3 fatty should be responsible for the relatively low depression rate among our ancestors.

Secondly, the arguer presumptuously assumes that large consumption of Asian societies should be responsible to the low depression rate. Even if we accept the arguer's assumption we discussed above, that is, omega -3 fatty acids do help low the general depression rate, we cannot conclude it is the large consumption of fish that help Asian people less likely to suffer from depression.  It is very likey that only few kinds of fish contain omega -3 fatty acids and Asia people do not consume them. Or their eating habits may also affect depression rate, considering the huge difference lies in the diets of western countries and eastren countries.

Thirdly, the arguer commits a false analogy. Even if large consumption of fish do low depression rates in Asia, the arguer cannot justifiably suggest that American will also gain similar befefit from it. Perhaps the way Asian people cook fish is completely different from that of American. Therefore, Asian dishes of fish tend to retain much more omega -3 fatty acids due to the cooking method while American dishes of fish lose nearly all the omega -3 fatty acids. Or perhaps the digestion system of Asian people are different from that of American, that is to say, they can absorb omega -3 fatty acids more easily given the fact that they have been eating fish for such a long time.

To sum up, the argument is well present, but not thoroughly reasoned. To make it more logically acceptable, the arguer should make a scientific analysis about those Asian societies and our ancestors to convince us that omega -3 fatty acids contained in fish do ensure lower depression rate. In addition, the aruguer should make sure that American can gain similar benefits from the measure the arguer suggests. Finally, the argument will be more acceptable if the aruger tells us which kind of fish contain omega -3 fatty acids.

hugeseaUID: 190158

觉得不好于是再来一次。不过正文第二个攻击点还是由于时间关系没展开。。

TOPIC: ARGUMENT187 - The following appeared as part of an article in a health magazine.
"A new discovery warrants a drastic ch ...
crazyjoo 发表于 2010-7-27 21:34

一看开头就是知道是北美模板，就没兴趣读下去了

starfirezhuUID: 2842465

TOPIC: ARGUMENT187 - The following appeared as part of an article in a health magazine.
"A new discovery warrants a drastic change in the diets of people living in the United States. Two scientists have recently suggested that omega -3 fatty acids (found in some fish and fish oils) play a key role in mental health. Our ancestors, who ate less saturated fat and more polyunsaturated fat, including omega -3 fatty acids, were much less likely to suffer from depression than we are today. Moreover, modern societies-such as those in Japan and Taiwan-that consume large quantities of fish report depression rates lower than that in the United States. Given this link between omega -3 fatty acids and depression, it is important for all people in the United States to increase their consumption of fish in order to prevent depression."
WORDS: 488          TIME: 00:29:58          DATE: 2010-7-27 21:26:10

[Introduction...]
The arguer recommends that all people in the United States should eat more fish in order to prevent depression. To make it more substantiated, the arguer points out a recent scientific study and the fact that ancestors ingested more omega -3 fatty acids and hence suffered from depression. Moreover, the arguer renders that (residents in Asian societies countries which where people) asian peole consume large amounts of fish  and they have less depression rates. However, this argument suffers from several flaws.

[Other factors should be taken into consideration...so many differences: eating habit, environment and living pressure... So the omega-3 fatty acids do not necessarily contribute to lower depression rate...]
Firstly, the arguer fails to take into consideration other factors which might keep out ancestors far away from depression. (Our ancestors and people living in the modern cities have all kinds of difference) Our ancestors differs from morden people in many different aspects, such as eating habit and living environment. Perhaps our ancestors can tend to like have some food which help lower the depression rate and are uncommon in the diet of a modern American. Or perhaps our ancestors did not have to withstand high pressure from competition as modern people. Moreover, they can breath fresher air and eat healtheir food. All in all, without ruling out these and other possibilities, it is unreasonable to conclude that omega -3 fatty should be responsible for the relatively low depression rate among our ancestors.

[Even if the Omega-3 fatty acids are effective, they might not be equally found in all fishes...]
Secondly, the arguer presumptuously assumes that large consumption of fish in Asian societies should be responsible to the low depression rate. Even if we accept the arguer's assumption we discussed above, that is, omega -3 fatty acids do help lower the general depression rate, we cannot conclude it is the large consumption of fish that help Asian people less likely to suffer from depression.  It is very likey that only few kinds of fish contain omega -3 fatty acids and Asian people do not consume them. Or their eating habits may also affect depression rate, considering the huge difference lies in the diets of between western countries and eastren countries.

[Consider different cooking methods...human races...]
Thirdly, the arguer commits a false analogy. Even if large consumption of fish does lower depression rates in Asia, the arguer cannot justifiably suggest that American will also gain similar befefit from it. Perhaps the way Asian people cook fish is completely different from that of Americans. Therefore, Asian dishes of fish tend to retain much more omega -3 fatty acids due to the cooking method while American dishes of fish lose nearly all the omega -3 fatty acids. Or perhaps the digestion system of Asian people are different from that of Americans, that is to say, they can absorb omega -3 fatty acids more easily given the fact that they have been eating fish for such a long time.

[Conclusion...]
To sum up, the argument is well presented, but not thoroughly reasoned. To make it more logically acceptable, the arguer should make a scientific analysis about those Asian societies and our ancestors to convince us that omega -3 fatty acids contained in fish do ensure lower depression rate. In addition, the aruguer should make sure that Americans can gain similar benefits from the measure recipe the arguer suggests. Finally, the argument will be more acceptable if the aruger tells us which kind of fish contain more omega -3 fatty acids.

xiaohuimi291UID: 2760978

咦，已经有人改了？
就提两点建议吧：1.段落内部的逻辑连接性不够强，让人觉得句子是独立的
                       （才发现原来我也是这样）；
                       2.还有模式化真的很明显，因为我俩的格式几乎是一样的呀:L