issue100

red98UID：136466

100  "The pressure to achieve high grades in school seriously limits the quality of learning. An educational environment without grades would promote more genuine intellectual development."

In such an era with rapid development and filled with high competition, both schools and students pay more attention to achieve high grades. As a result, some pressures of study are put on our students. Some people hold that the pressure will do harm to the students and lead them to a boring future. In my opinion, we should put grades in a right place to promote all-round development of our students.

The pressure can help our students to obtain concrete fundamental knowledge. All students have the experience that it is the pressure to achieve high grades in tests motivates us to study harder and enables us to grasp the essences of the subjects. For example, if you want to get a high grade in a mathematics examination, you have to understand basic theories and use them to resolve specific problems. The resolution process will help you to understand related theories. If you have no the pressure to get a high score, you will not try your best to understand the theories, say nothing of practicing many times to utilize them to get the essences. The pressure, in fact, activates our students to learn more efficiently.

The pressure also can help our students to develop omnipotent ability. In the formal education, we hope our students can be all-round ones. We expect our students can be not only healthy, happy and successful but decent, strong and good. However, our students are so young that they might not be interested in some difficult but important courses which can improve key ability. If there is no pressure to push them to learn the courses, they will refuse to take related classes. With the pressure, students have to take these courses seriously. Probably they will find those courses very interesting and develop related ability happily. As a result, our students can be cultivated to a person with all basic ability, which lead them to a happy future.

On the other hand, if the importance of grades is overstated, students will pay all their attention to their studies. They will no longer have chance to contact the real world and this debases their ability to analyze social problems. They will have no time to communicate with other people and lose the chance to learn to how to get well with others. In recent 10 years, Chinese students have spent almost all their time on study for the very huge pressure from the dramatic competition in college entrance test. They have to memorize many history events and chemical phenomena. They have to do all kinds of practices from day to night. As a result, some surveys show that the quality of today’s Chinese students has fallen down.      

To sum up, we should put grades in a right place to promote all-round development of our students. We should not hold the opinion that the pressure for high grades is useless, because the pressure can motivate our students to obtain concrete fundamental knowledge and develop omnipotent ability. Still we should not overrate the grades. If we overemphasize the grades, our students will be limited in a very narrow scope. They will lose lots of chances to improve the ability beyond the courses.

560 words

alan_903UID：110685

very good

非常不错的文章，写的正反都很清楚

是5分的文章

但是你的字数我没统计，你在写的时候能够在有效时间内finish 它吗？

你的这篇文章都可以当范文了，具备一切ets 所喜欢的结构和组织方式

继续努力

red98UID：136466

最初由 alan_903 发布
[B]very good

非常不错的文章，写的正反都很清楚

是5分的文章

但是你的字数我没统计，你在写的时候能够在有效时间内finish 它吗？

你的这篇文章都可以当范文了，..

以下省略...... [/B]

谢谢你的鼓励

现在还不能够在有效的时间内完成
我想分阶段走  
第一阶段 先把文章写出来 学会写
第二阶段 关注难的题目 达到拿到题目心里有谱 不惧怕偏难题 如艺术政治等
第三阶段 练习速度 在有效时间内完成

我现在还在第一阶段

一起努力

angeikimUID：4857

最初由 red98 发布
[B]No.1 issue 100
100 "The pressure to achieve high grades in school seriously limits the quality of learning. An educational environment without grades would promote more genuine intellectual development."  [/B]

这个题目是说学习的目的。我的意见是：这个题目是把个人的学习目标和学校的评价机制相混淆了。
the topic of this statement is : to achieve high grades. 围绕这个展开对学校和个人的评论 [/COLOR]

In such an era with rapid development and filled with high competition, both schools and students pay more attention to achieve high grades. schools pay more attention?? [/COLOR] As a result, some pressures of study are put on our students. Some people hold that the pressure will do harm to the students and lead them to a boring future. boring future? what do u mean?  In my opinion, we should put grades in a right place to promote all-round development of our students.

The pressure can help our students to obtain concrete fundamental knowledge. All students have the experience that it is the pressure to achieve high grades in tests motivates us to study harder and enables us to grasp the essences of the subjects. For example, if you want to get a high grade in a mathematics examination, you have to understand basic theories and use them to resolve specific problems. The resolution process will help you to understand related theories. If you have no the pressure 这个PRESSURE的定冠词这里应该去掉，你在文章中的定冠词的用法感觉有点问题。。 [/COLOR]to get a high score, you will not try your best to understand the theories, say nothing of practicing many times to utilize them to get the essences. 这后半句话？？[/COLOR]The pressure, in fact, activates our students to learn more efficiently.


The pressure also can help our students to develop omnipotent ability. In the formal education, FORMAL EDUCATION？直接写the goal of education 就好了[/COLOR] we hope our students can be all-round ones. We expect our students can be not only healthy, happy and successful but decent, strong and good. However, our students are so young that they might not be interested in some difficult but important courses which can improve key ability. 什么KEY ABILITY? 要说什么？ [/COLOR]If there is no pressure to push them to learn the courses, they will refuse to take related classes. With the pressure, students have to take these courses seriously. Probably they will find those courses very interesting and develop related ability happily. As a result, our students can be cultivated to a person with all basic ability, which lead them to a happy future.
两个段落看下来，感觉很多地方阐述的不清楚，而且逻辑关系有点松散，有些看的不是很懂的感觉。[/COLOR]


On the other hand, if the importance of grades is overstated, students will pay all their attention to their studies. They will no longer have chance to contact the real world and this debases their ability to analyze social problems. They will have no time to communicate with other people and lose the chance to learn to how to get well with others. In recent 10 years, Chinese students have spent almost all their time on study for the very huge pressure from the dramatic competition in college entrance test. They have to memorize many history events and chemical phenomena. They have to do all kinds of practices from day to night. As a result, some surveys show that the quality of today’s Chinese students has fallen down. QUALITY？什么方面是不是应该限定一下？感觉你这样说美国大学都不敢收中国学生了。太绝对了[/COLOR]

To sum up, we should put grades in a right place to promote all-round development of our students. We should not hold the opinion that the pressure for high grades is useless, because the pressure can motivate our students to obtain concrete fundamental knowledge and develop omnipotent ability. Still we should not overrate the grades. If we overemphasize the grades, our students will be limited in a very narrow scope. They will lose lots of chances to improve the ability beyond the courses.

560 words
感觉写的一般，语言还可以但是思维不是很严谨，有的地方感觉叙述不清楚逻辑上也有点松散。只是一般的对题目的解释，没有非常尽兴的阐述题目中心。有凑合写成的感觉。
努力吧。 [/COLOR]