我要死了 我就这点水平怎么办？

menmen911UID: 2862387

前几天托福出成绩已经给我我一个很大的打击
今天上机打作文又把我搞的要死 用模考软件随机了篇
题目是自己以前笔头写过的
结果根本没思路，边看以前的边打 很恶心的完成了一篇
人生从来没这么悲剧过 我这么就选了这条路呢？

放上这篇习作，我不奢望大家来改，只是想让大家估计下：3分，就3分，能达到吗？
之前还一直去看3分的范文来给自己鼓励 看来我是太天真了

TOPIC: ISSUE147 - "Tradition and modernization are incompatible. One must choose between them."
WORDS: 431
TIME: 00:47:31
DATE: 2010-8-9 10:38:32

The speaker claims that there is no relation between tradition and modernization .Moreover ,the speaker also indicates that if one want to choose anyone of them ,he must lose another .I tend my view to disagree with both the conclusions .The reasons are stated as follows.

To begin with ,it is true that there are much difference between tradition and modernization .Tradition refers to belief ,values ,customs ,ways of life and the like ,which are hand down from generation to generation in a society .While modernization refers to the process of urbanization , industrialization ,or in a large sense, westernization .Modernization can accept new things easily but tradition does not .Take my grandparents for instance ,Internet is widely used in our life ,we prefer to do everything on the Internet ,like writing papers ,talking with old friends ,watching TV programs and shopping online .But my grandparents always do things in tradition ways ,they still use letters to westernization with us ,go to the shops to buy things ,take bikes from one place to another.

Nevertheless ,we can not simply deny the common points according the reasons above .Many things changed every year ,but still something intrinsic can not be changed .For example ,we do not have the right to kill a people in any case from ancient time to recent, we can not tell lies whether it could bring advantages us or someone else .We must accept punishment when we make mistakes .What’s more ,modernization comes from tradition ,many new technologies we use today are based on the experience and knowledge in the past. If the Industrial Revolution did not happened, maybe we still work with hands instead of using machines, if scientists had not fund the penicillin, many people will be killed because of the flu.

In addition, we can put both tradition and modernization together. The effect they bring to us can beyond our expectation. Jay Chou, one of the most famous singers in our nation. He often sings hip-pop songs in his CDs, but he still creates some Chinese style songs which are well received by us. When he runs his live concert, he often sings native songs to the audience .Because his songs combine both characteristics of east and west. His fans are all over the world. Another example is the construct of buildings ,we can build a house with a tradition style and the fitments in it are modern .Like the houses near the West Lake ,a beautiful lake in my hometown, they looks like old houses while they have fridge, air-conditions, TVs and everything you want in it. Hence, the price of these houses is as high as you can not image.

To sum up, when it comes to whether tradition and modernization are incompatible no not. I hold my view that there are both difference and same point between them, the only thing we should do is to take the upside of both of them in our daily life.

irvine666UID: 2575525

套了大量TOEFL模板的吧...这样憋的3分是肯定么有的。
至于你的问题可以看这里：https://bbs.gter.net/thread-952861-1-1.html

德芬郡奶油UID: 2843869

请先把文章放在word里查错，再发上来。

没查过错的文章发上来，是对自己和别人都不负责任。

menmen911UID: 2862387

2# irvine666


版主你好，模板我没有用 但是开头和结尾是模仿其他人的范式的 城市化的定义是作文大讲堂里的
我已经放到word里去检查过了
能给点建议吗？比如思想有点偏题什么的（文字很儿科我知道）？
我会好好研究那篇文章的 谢谢

menmen911UID: 2862387

3# 德芬郡奶油


这个网友对不住了 因为我的word是精简版的 所以当时没注意
我现在重新装了个 也改好了 当然发现了很多问题 谢谢你的批评 我以前一直无视这个功能的
没有你的话我真还不知道用word改作文的好处的 呵呵

szmanutdUID: 2727152

建议你把每个issue的提纲用中文列一遍 如果有时间 可以展开各个事例 一个一个分类的写 大讲堂里面很详细，但是不要套里面的例子 不知道多少万人用过了
这样多练习下来你至少字数也达标了 瞄了一下你的作文 模版味太重