【每日写作】，28日 独立 求狠批。。

卡束斯UID: 2836974

Is the ability to read and write more important today than in the past?

  The capacity of individuals to read and write is always vital in one’s life since it is closely related to one’s ability to gain new information and  express it.Is the ability to learn and express more important today than in the  past?My point of view is listed as follows.

It seems like that possess the ability is the only way we could survive from the imformation age we dealt with.The imformation we faced with in one  single day may exceed the 19th mortals’ whole lifetime to learn.Our work  conditions requre higher ability to learn and use the new knowledgy quickly  and accurately than that of yore.

Despite the highly competitive conditions of work,we still need the ability to gain the imformation.For we need know more things to make friends and communicate with others since nobody wants to deal with boring ones.

However,the work are becoming more specialized and for that reason some industries do not require highly ability to read and write.Some work require  practical experiences more than abstract knowledge.For instance,a pilot’s work is driving the plane safety and a model’s duty is present the designers work beautifully.The only thing their could to do to save their job is practicing which has little to do with the ability to read and write.

Although work specialized may provide some jobs do not require this ability which is for the minority,as long as we live in the imformation age and have the need to socialize,read and write capacity is more constitutive to ones life than of yore.

chxh2020UID: 2587109

继续加油!!

卡束斯UID: 2836974

17# chxh2020
楼上的，这个根本就没有改什么把。。

taylor.1023UID: 2713071

Is the ability to read and write more important today than in the past?

The capacity of individuals to read and write is always vital in one’s life since it is closely related to one’s ability to gain new information and  express it.（个人觉得这里的提问有些唐突，如果可以先来个新旧对比的话，也许会更合理一些。） Is the ability to learn and express more important today than in the  past? My point of view is listed as follows.

It seems like that possess(possessing) the ability is the only way we could survive from the imformation(information) age we dealt(are dealing) with.The imformation we faced with in one  single day may exceed the 19th mortals’ whole lifetime to learn.Our work  conditions requre higher ability(require at the higher level) to learn and use the new knowledgy quickly  and accurately than that of yore.

Despite the highly competitive conditions(environment) of work, we still need the ability to gain(obtain) the imformation.For we need know more things to make friends and communicate with others since nobody wants to deal with boring ones.

However,the work are becoming more specialized and for that reason some industries do not require highly ability to read and write.Some work(professions) require  practical experiences more than abstract knowledge.For instance,a pilot’s work(responsibility/task) is driving the plane safety and a model’s duty is present the designers work beautifully(in an elegant and fashionable way).The only thing their could do to save their job is practicing which has little to do with the ability to read and write.

Although work specialized may provide some jobs do not require this ability which is for the minority, (Although some specialized jobs has less requirement to the capacity,) as long as we live in the imformation age and have the need to socialize,read and write capacity is more constitutive to ones life than of yore.

第一次帮别人改作文，很抱歉，没有什么很好的建议能给你。不过一起加油咯！

卡束斯UID: 2836974

Whether letting a friends make a mistake or saying or doing something that may destroy the friendship is undoubtly a difficult choice for everyone.This happens in our daily lives and no one wants to deal with it.

Sometimes,watching a friend making mistake which could influence his or her lives and doing nothing about it may require more vagor than just correcting the mistakes even though there is a risk of losing a friend.Suppose your friend devoted half of his savings to an investment and obtain large profit from it therefore he decided to put all his eggs into the same box and couraged all his friend to do the same thing.You see the potential of highly risks while other friends are starting interested in the investment and It’s not hard to for you to imagine the horrible consequeces which is far beyond their capacities to swallow.But there is a chance they could profit from the investment,and if you stop them from doing this they might blame you in the future when things come out in an  opposite way.At this time,I think it requires one a good virtue to step out and warn them the end might lead to.The worse thing than to lose a friend is to watch them destroy their own lives.

Besides,when you decide to hide the truth from your friend you need to know the risks of losing them still existing.They won’t forgive you once they find out your behavior behind their back.

After all,we need to measure the influence of mistakes,and then make dicision.Serious mistakes need to be fix otherwise bad ending comings.

卡束斯UID: 2836974

Undisputably facts in our lives are vital to everyone and that’s the lesson we should learn through our whole lives.Howerver,I think the major job for students to do is to learn concept in their class or by themselves.My reasons are list as follows.

Firstly,a student’s educational background determine where she or he could reach.The interviewer concern more acadamic background than how many facts a student learn the first year after their gruduation for their value are their potential to learn from their work and their acadamic talent.For that reason a student’s protocol is to study at school.

Secondly,we need to do the right thing at the right time for that human’s energy are limited.Only making efforts step by step can we achieve success.If a student spend a lot of time to learn facts and leave his or her study behind and after graduation he or she need to pay off the debt.One will need to contribute twice or more energy to fix the problem.

Thirdly,we need to do the right thing at the right place.Even though some individuals consider learning facts are important than learning concept,they don’t have the circumstances to learn facts efficiently.Society is a better place to learn facts than school.We should study at school and learn facts in society.For instance,a person who enter the society and work for a year may acknowledgy the facts ten times to a senier student.

In a word, Taking into account of all these factors, we may reach the conclusion that a sudent’s priority is to spare no effort to his or her major job.Not until they perform their duty well should they spare their energy to learn the facts.

makeithappenUID: 2585223

It is late. I am very very sorry about that. 1001.doc (28 KB, 下载次数: 2)

2010-10-4 19:05:46 上传

下载次数: 2

btw I like your example.

S酱UID: 2883188

1002

Undisputably facts in our lives are vital to everyone and that’s the lesson we should learn through our whole lives.Howerver,I think the major job for students to do is to learn concept in their class or by themselves.My reasons are list（listed） as follows.

Firstly,a student’s educational background determine where she or he could reach（ reach因为是vt么所以貌似要接 which place， go 的话搭配where）.The interviewer concern（concerns） more acadamic（academic） background than how many facts a student learn the first year after their gruduation（graduation） for their value are their potential to learn from their work and their acadamic talent.For that reason a student’s protocol is to study at school.
（第一段主要论述了学生在学校的主要目的是学习＝ ＝嗯，但是没有进一步说明学校比较重视idea和concept，因此显得有点不够切贴）

Secondly（有人说一般这个口语用，于是推荐用second）,we need to do the right thing at the right time ，for that（because） human’s energy are limited.Only making efforts step by step can we achieve success.If a student spend a lot of time to learn facts and leave his or her study behind and（，） after graduation he or she need to pay off the debt.One will need to contribute twice or more energy to fix the problem.

Thirdly,we need to do the right thing at the right place.Even though some individuals consider learning facts are important than learning concept,they don’t have the circumstances to learn facts efficiently.Society is a better place to learn facts than school.We should study at school （为了和切题以及与后面对应，这里最好写learn concept和ideas）and learn facts in society.For instance,a person who enter the society and work for a year may acknowledgy（ acknowledge） the facts ten times to a senier student.（这说法不是很好的感觉）

In a word, Taking into account of all these factors, we may reach the conclusion that a sudent’s priority is to spare no effort to his or her major job. Not until they perform their duty well should they spare their energy to learn the facts.倒装挺好

看见你1002好像木有赶上分组，于是我路过改一下～～总体挺好，但是觉得长句里and多了点，除此之外还是注意点拼写好了～

话说，我也有没赶上分组的，可以的话也帮我看看吧～呵呵～ 这里 40楼 927

卡束斯UID: 2836974

There are many causes of unhealthy eating habits. Individuals at contemporary age tend to have unhealthy lives. Many of them who indulge in games or party will not go to bed until the midnight and skip the breakfast mainly because they wake up late. There are full of drug addicts and alcohol mania. It seems like people today do not care about themselves. However, the fact that women who methodically organize their lives also have unhealthy eating habits reminds us the advertising indeed has a significant impact on them.

The manufacturers of fashion industry investigate millions of dollars on advertisement using the skinny model. The advertisements carry out the image that the most beautiful woman has slender body shape. At the same time, the enterprises manufacture massive number of outfits that only skinny girl fit in. Basically, the fashion industries cultivate the sick aesthetic value and women tend to be on a diet under the pressure. Another fact hard to believe is that the manufacture also held responsibility for those women who are over weight. Once those women feel that they are not thinly and cannot reduce their appetite they simply give up on themselves. They may have normal body shape at the beginning.

The medicine industries participate in the problem as well. Once those companies find out that there are massive profits in the market they make nonprescription drugs to help women lose weight and then put advertisements. The advertisement carry out another image that skinny is healthy. Indisputable this will lead to a terrible consequence that more woman to go on a diet.

Besides, those companies which have nothing to do with the market have influences on the audiences. They follow the sick aesthetic value and use those slender models. Now the public do not have choice but dwell on the culture.              

For those reasons above, we can safely draw the conclusion that advertisement indeed cultivate the unhealthy eating habits.

zjing928UID: 2928767

There are many causes of unhealthy eatinghabits. Individuals at contemporary age tend to have unhealthy lives. Many ofthem who indulge in games or party will not go to bed until the midnight andskip the breakfast mainly because they wake up late. There are full of drugaddicts and alcohol mania. It seems like(like语法错误，应去掉，或改为that) people today do not care aboutthemselves. However, the fact that women who(此句语意不通，应为否定式)do not methodically organize theirlives also have unhealthy eating habits reminds us of theadvertising indeed has a significant impact on them. - F& c' V' b4 t6 X

+ w# v( s4 u$ V* Z" lThemanufacturers of fashion industry investigate millions of dollars onadvertisement using the skinny model. The advertisements carry out the imagethat the most beautiful woman has slender body shape. At the same time, theenterprises manufacture massive numbers ofoutfits that only skinny girls fit in.Basically, the fashion industries cultivate the sick aesthetic value and womentend to be on a diet under the pressure. Another fact hard to believe is thatthe manufacture(manufacturer是制造商的意思，建议改成manufacturers) also held (hold时态错误) responsibility for those women who are overweight（corpulent/stout/obese可用它们替换）and exorbitant trust in the effect of the weight-reducingfood. Once those women(与前句重复women改为who) feel that they are not thinly(thin或者是slim) and cannot reduce their appetite,they simply give up on themselves. They may have normal body shape at thebeginning.(本段最后三句话阐述不清，制造商对妇女的过度肥胖，应加一句是说妇女依赖一些减肥药之类的,已用蓝色标记)9 x" h7 y()5 t8 X4 I& j(())

2 s' s% T; A6 E! K6 `/ pThemedicine industries participate in the problem as well. Once those companiesfind out that there are massive profits in the market they make nonprescription(non-prescribed或者直接用OTC) drugs to help women lose weight and then put advertisements. Theadvertisements carry outanother image（可以换成give customers the impression,避免重复) that skinny（此为形容词，应用名词thinness） is healthy. Indisputable this will lead to a terrible consequencethat more woman to go on a diet.(是否试图用倒装？语法错误)
/ ?9 a, y: s& G3 l4 o. K! g
) T1 t* m/ ]2 e" R+ v* MBesides,those companies which have nothing to do with themarket(既然是company就肯定与market有关吧？)have influences on the audiences. They follow the sick aestheticvalue and use those slender models. Now the public do not have choice but dwellon the culture.              
* s6 M& `3 U- y3 J
4 r. B2 U# R1 [8 O+ V% U) KForthose reasons above, we can safely draw the conclusion that advertisementindeed cultivate the unhealthy eating habits.


文章前部分写得比后半部分好。
段与段之间的结构搭配不协调。
一起加油吧！

卡束斯UID: 2836974

Some people contend that the government should support scientific researches whether they have practical use or not. As my point of view, this is an arbitrary assumption.

Most importantly, a government’s function is to secure and improve the citizens’ live qualities. From this perspective, I vote for the side that the government should be highly practical. When we consider the limited funding budget and infinite public needs, the support of little use of scientific study would definitely lead to the low effective of funding use and eventually harm the market. Also, the government has an obligation to answer the taxpayers how did their tax spend.

Some people would argue that many application scientific are developed from theoretical scientific which has been considered lack of practical use for a long period. The government should propose for the future. The argument is hard to defeat at first because it uses a general principle that you cannot deny the possibility. The question is solved when I thought deeper. Firstly, those opposite claim share the same point of view that the government should be practical regardless they focused on the value or the potential value. At this point, a government could allocate some federal funding for the scientific research which has less real value for the time being but more potential. We still agreed on that it is the practical matter and have the same conclusion.

Other people would contend that the government’s support of scientific would encourage a dynamic academic circumstance. The government has already support the art activities and we should do the same on science. For starter, I do not think that the art and science stand the same-that is to say, the principle unfit the issue . The government should not shape or encourage any type of citizen’s life style either.

From the description above, my stand is that the government should not support the scientific study with no practical value.

蝶飞依依UID: 2905269

Some people contend that the government should support scientific researches whether they have practical use or not. As my point of view, this is an arbitrary assumption.
r, k) D4 @
Most importantly, a government’s function is to secure and improve the citizens’ live qualities. From this perspective, I vote for the side that the government should be highly practical. （这里可以列举一点例子，比如说政府需要投钱去建设医疗设施，规划教育资源，保证交通运输等等）When we consider the limited funding budget and infinite public needs, the support of little use of scientific study would definitely lead to the low effective of funding use and eventually harm the market. Also, the government has an obligation to answer the taxpayers how did their tax spend. * K0 R$ U+ {5 i; [

Some people would argue that many application scientific are developed from theoretical scientific which has been considered lack of practical use for a long period. The government should propose for the future. The argument is hard to defeat at first because it uses a general principle that you cannot deny the possibility. The question is solved when I thought deeper. Firstly, those opposite claim share the same point of view that the government should be practical regardless they focused on the value or the potential value. At this point, a government could allocate some federal funding for the scientific research which has less real value for the time being but more potential. We still agreed on that it is the practical matter and have the same conclusion.
e5 X; M: t2 q! I
Other people would contend（换个词吧，像consider, assert） that the government’s support of scientific would encourage a dynamic academic circumstance. The government has already support the art activities and we should do the same on science. (这句话我不太明白，art activities 和academic circumstance 有什么关系吗，是不是可以在and之前加一句解释support art 的结果)For starter, I do not think that the art and science stand the same-that is to say, the principle unfit the issue . The government should not shape or encourage any type of citizen’s life style either.

From the description above, my stand is that the government should not support the scientific study with no practical value.
楼主语言很流畅，观点也很棒，我都没想到这么多观点，就是段与段之间，观点与观点之间的逻辑关系感觉不是很紧密，如果能写出一种层层递进的感觉就更好了。借鉴了~~

卡束斯UID: 2836974

Some people suggest that in the busy and crowded world, people should not be expected to be polite to others. In my perspective of view, I think that people should always be polite to others.
First, I do not appreciate the motive of the statement. It transfers the information that people only care about their own interests and give no think of others feelings. The cost of being polite to people around is actually low. People sometimes tend to be altruistic. We volunteer to help elderly and candidate. We care about the child abuse and woman’s condition.  I think as a society we need to encourage the altruism and stop yelling selfish word.
Second, as practical matter, the statement also failed to consider some prospect. The only reason that people live with their busy work is that they want better live conditions. We all want love and belonging. For that reason we need offer other politeness and kindness. It is the easiest way to achieve emotional needs. While we show the kindness and politeness to neighbors we may get great fed back.
If people start disrespecting others and break the social order for their own good the world will be more crowd than ever. Eventually they will suffer from their bad behavior.

beangtUID: 2691375

Some people suggest that in the busy and crowded world, people should not be expected to be polite to others. In my perspective (point) of view, I think (跟前面重复吧？) that people should always be polite to others.( ?: H0 F* y. P8 ?* g
First, I do not appreciate the motive of the statement. It transfers the information that people only care about their own interests and give no think of others feelings. The cost of being polite to people around is actually low. People sometimes tend to be altruistic. We volunteer to help (the) elderly and candidate (?). We care about the child abuse and woman’s condition.  I think as a society we need to encourage the altruism and stop yelling selfish word.
这段的例子跟polite有关系么？感觉有点偏题

Second, as practical matter, the statement also failed to consider some prospects. The only reason that people live with their busy work is that they want better live conditions. We all want love and (the sence of) belonging. For that reason we need offer other politeness and kindness. It is the easiest way to achieve (satisfy) emotional needs. While we show the kindness and politeness to neighbors we may get great fed back. 7 |1 w2 {& h0 b* P
If people start disrespecting others and break the social order for their own good the world will be more crowd than ever. Eventually they will suffer from their bad behavior.

感觉没写完，字数还是不太够，内容不太充实，第二段的意思我没太看懂。总之，共同努力吧！加油！！！