Gina的作文帖 新手 请狠批

ginacatUID: 2744381

928 独立 What is a very important skill a person should learn in order to be successful in the world today? Choose one skill and use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.
With the computer playing an increasingly big role in today's society, more and more people believes that the computer skill can be one of the most important skill that people would choose if they have never studied. They hold this opinion that people who can not use computers have less opportunity to compete with others. My point that computer skill is the most essential one that we should learn is just them, which is based on following aspects.

First of all, computer, which is a great invention of the information age, becomes an indispensable tool for individual to acquire knowledge. Through computers people are able to acquire a whole new way to the wide knowledge which updates so fast in nowadays. For example, Google has already been one of the most common way for people who is trying to know something, which, of course, is based on using computers. As the case of myself, my personal experience also shows that computers make our eyes widen as an indispensable tool. There are two examinations for me this year, which are both extremely important and difficult for me. For preparing them, I need to obtain a lot of information, like the skills and the experience of the examination and I found them just by using computers to surf on the internet. So I can obviously conclude that without computers, I will get less opportunity to pass these two examinations. Computers have already become an indispensable tool for people today.

The second reason for my propensity is that computer programming is important to our daily life. We can easily find that the application of computer programming is widely used everywhere and the computers make our life much better. We do not have to wait for the cashier to calculate all the numbers by themselves in the supermarket because computer programming can actually do that for us. There are supposed to be countless examples here can be cited to illustrate that computer programming exists everywhere in our life. But it is the strongest instance which can support my point that we are having TOEFL exam by using a computer programming. Through this programming I am able to have a communication with the teachers in ETS to show my ability of expressing English. Computers actually bring much more availability to our daily life. So if I could study a subject that I have never had a chance to learn, I will certainly choose the one which can make my life much more easily than before.

Last but no the least, it is undoubted that computer skills can help us to get a better job after graduation .As the population grows more and more fast in china, the society becomes more and more competitive. We can easily be aware of the idea that the employer prefers a employee who can use computers in a very familiar way. They can not only help themselves to adapt to the new working environment better, but also do their jobs in a more effective way. Today, learning using computers can help us to get a better job in China where the employment becomes very serious problem.

In a word, it is very reasonable that I choose learning computers if I could study one subject that I have never learned before. The computer can offer me a lot of knowledge, the availability of life and a better chance to have a good job.

lancelot_zxUID: 2456662

说几点吧.首先建议LZ去多背一些闪光句.网上有新东方什么100句还可以.语言上需要多优化
其次第二段的论点我觉得不是很合适,computer programming对于除了cs专业的人大部分难以掌握，不能指望一个人去编ets的考试系统吧。所以我觉得LZ这里可以说一些办公室软件比如office这些比较合适。
另外我稍微改了第一段，供LZ参考
As the computer has become a fundamental tool in today’s society, people in increasing numbers begin to hold the belief that the computer skill can be one of the most important skills for those who never studied. Also it is indisputable that mastering the computer skill can put people in a favorable position when facing various opportunities. Therefore in my opinion, computer skill is an essential skill that people should learn to be successful in today’s world, which will be substantiated in the following aspects.

caoxuemeiUID: 2629828

928 独立 What is a very important skill a person should learn in order to be successful in the world today? Choose one skill and use specific reasons and examples to support your choice.
With the com ...
ginacat 发表于 2010-9-28 23:40

同学注意到这里的小组活动没？建议去参加，同学们就可以互相改了

ginacatUID: 2744381

我在做活动啊 3# caoxuemei

ginacatUID: 2744381

3# caoxuemei
啊 非常谢谢啊
application 除了自己编程以外还应该有使用吧。。。其实我是按照这个题目来写的 所以整个都有一点跑偏了
If you could study a subject you have never had a chance to learn,which do you choose
嗯嗯嗯 非常谢谢你给的意见呢 我会去老老实实背句子的
像你给我写的第一段我会好好消化然后再和自己的比较 看自己的不足
总之还是谢谢哦 这是我第一篇。。。。

ginacatUID: 2744381

恩。。。谢谢你改的~
我改的那个句子 是个时间状语从句 实际上也是两个句子 所以有两个谓语动词是OK的哦~
6# chenyyalex