我刚写的托福作文，希望热心的人有空能帮我看看改一下。谢谢！

mapanUID: 2740287

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现在还能加入作文互改小组吗？
看坛子里有好几个小组的帖子看得我眼花缭乱。
题目： Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
   
    Nowadays, there is no doubt that we come into contact with various kinds of advertisements almost everywhere such as newspapers, television, Internet and magazines. I even feel as if advertisements have become one necessary aspect of the information era. As far as I am concerned, there may be one or two disadvantages of advertisements, however, I believe that there are far more advantages of them which may improve our lives.


    First, the advertisements make it more convenient for us to shop. For example, there is no need for us to go to the exclusive stores or the official websites to search some news about the new products of some brands. Because the advertisements can tell us the latest information about the things we want to learn about as soon as possible. That can also save us plenty of time. Then we can determine whether to buy the products just according to the advertisements. I think they really make the shopping more easily.

    Secondly, advertisements let the products be more real. That is to say, the videos from the television or Internet and the colorful images from the magazines or newspapers are capable of showing the characters of the products more vividly. For instance, when people watch a model wear a beautiful sweater walking on the street, they may imagine that how the sweaters would look in themselves. That unique imagination allows them to feel as if they are trying on the sweaters.

    On the other hand, even some advertisements can teach us some meaningful things. For example, the Nike basketball shoe advertisements often play some diligent training videos of Kobe Bryant and say that even though he is a superstar, he never stops practice. I really like this style because it tells me that success comes from practice and practice makes perfect. Also, some other commercial advertisements show a moving story about friendship, love or family relationship which can actually arouse our emotional resonance to publicize the products. To some degree, these distinctive advertisements surpass the commerce because they help us think more about life. I hope the advertisements would become more and more humanized.

    Admittedly, some advertisements especially the fraudulent ones do have several bad impact on our life because they always try to induce us to buy some unnecessary things which we actually do not need. But, the advertisements can bring us convenience, make the products more real and teach us a lesson about life. Therefore, I deem that advertisements may improve our lives.

caoxuemeiUID: 2629828

可以加的。122387769

mapanUID: 2740287

能帮我看看嘛？谢谢！

MaPleJeffreYUID: 2865239

3# mapan 先帮你看两段...哈哈
Nowadays, there is no doubt that our life has been filled up with various kinds of advertisements through different medium, such as newspapers, television, Internet, and so forth. I even feel as if advertisements have become the necessity of the current information era.Despite the fact that there might be several negative effects brought by all different advertisements in our life, I still believe that the advantages of them are of more importance and irreplaceable.
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First(To begin with),  the advertisements are bringing us more convenience for shopping. For example, with the help of advertisements, the customers would be able to save the time wasted in making comparison between different shops, different styles and different brands. Usually the advertisements can illustrate the information, usually the advantages, of the goods explicitly. Therefore, we can determine our choices according to the advertisements, and it really makes the shopping more easily.
其实，我觉得你的论点不够有说服力。因为，广告也可能让shopping更复杂。那么多牌子的广告，没法分清楚怎么选。
而且，广告的内容不可信。单单依靠广告购物是少之又少的。

mapanUID: 2740287

恩，我想了半天实在想不出什么例子了，觉得第三段的例子还行！有空你看看。谢谢你的评论啊！ 4# MaPleJeffreY