【Snickers小组】11月15日 issue130 by彼年豆蔻

彼年豆蔻UID: 2791778

The author states that the society’s future depends on the socialization of today’s children and until now we still don’t know how to teach children who can make our society greater. In my opinion, I think both these two statements are one-sided and subjective to some extent. Society’s fate is influenced by many factors and socialization of children is just one of them. In addition, whether a society is better or worse is a matter that different people have different judgements.

First of all, although it is a fact that the more the children are socialized, the more they can fit the environment of this society. However, this fitness dosen’t necessarily mean that these children can contribute more to the society. Every different society has its own set of rules and needs. In fact, many of the rules may not right on moral or other terms. In other words, those children who are socialized better merely mean they understand these rules and can better meet these needs. But does their work or action really have some value to this society? Of course we can’t answer this question just relying on a person’s socialization. A person’s contribution to the society depends on his ability and knowledge and his or her achievement. For example, a people who is most sociable and has many friends in a company is always not the person who contributes most to the society because he or she has to spend more time to adapt to the company’s interpersonal relationship than other people. Socialization is just a skill or method to help people to work or study more smoothly but their real achievements are based on their abilities and efforts and knowledge.

Moreover, the future fate of the society is not a matter depends on the socialization of children. Socialization means the process of the learning the rules of society environment and of knowing how to survive within it. From this definition we can know if a child was socialized very well, it means his ability to adapt to the society’s rules is very strong, however, it doesn’t mean his capacity in work or study is very strong. In fact, many great people in history they couldn’t adapt to their society and weren’t socialized very well in some ways. For example, the Albert Einstein and Beethoven , Einstein’s IQ was very high, but his childhood didn’t get any benefit from this merit. Actually, since his poor school performance and low EQ, his teacher and classmates thought he is a feebleminded person and thus isolating him. Beethoven even didn’t know how to fit to the society all his life since his illness and temper. He had no wife and good friends, but all these things didn’t prevent them from contributing to their society. Thus we can know, achievements can not attained just by our ability to get socialized or meet all the rules of the society, it is a thing need our real capacity and endeavor.

Second, I don’t think current people still don’t know how to instruct their children to construct a better society, on the contrary, I do realize that our society is becoming better and better in most aspects. It is commonly believe that a better society is the society which is richer in economy and more tolerant to all the people than before. We can see these advancements using our eyes and hearts, now our living condition is better than ever before. Meanwhile, our society’s tolerance to different people and different ideas is higher than any time before. For example, current society allow homosexual marriage and more and more people begin to learn how to respect others’ attitudes and viewpoints, although they are different from his ideas. Our society is consistently developing and all the advancements are brought out by every generations. Therefore, it is unfair to suggest that we are not aware of instructing our children, because our parents also instructed us like this and fact can prove their teaching is not bad.

To sum up, children is the tomorrow of our society and all the things would be constructed by them one day. However, how the children are socialized is not very significant to the society’s destiny, the most important thing is their ability and knowledge. Also, how to better construct the society is a hard job for our children but I believe they can create a better world according to their own needs and hopes.

zcsdtcUID: 2875047

The author states that the society’s future depends on the socialization of today’s children and until now we still don’t know how to teach children who can make our society greater. In my opinion, I think both these two statements are one-sided and subjective to some extent. Society’s fate is influenced by many factors and socialization of children is just one of them. In addition, whether a society is better or worse is a matter that different people have different judgements（judgments）.

First of all, although it is a fact that the more the children are socialized, the more they can fit the environment of this society. However, this fitness doesn’t necessarily mean that these children can contribute more to the society. Every different society has its own set of rules and needs. In fact, many of the rules may not （be）right on moral or other terms. In other words, those children who are socialized better merely mean they understand these rules and can better meet these needs. But does their work or action really have some value to this society? Of course we can’t answer this question just relying on a person’s socialization. A person’s contribution to the society depends on his ability and knowledge and his or her achievement. For example, a people who is most sociable and has many friends in a company is always not the person who contributes most to the society because he or she has to spend more time to adapt to the company’s interpersonal relationship than other people. Socialization is just a skill or method to help people to work or study more smoothly but their real achievements are based on their abilities and efforts and knowledge.(可以举例，一些科学、文化上的名人的例子，更加生动)

Moreover, the future fate of the society is not a matter depends on the socialization of children. Socialization means the process of the learning the rules of society environment and of knowing how to survive within it. From this definition we can know if a child was socialized very well, it means his ability to adapt to the society’s rules is very strong, however, it doesn’t mean his capacity in work or study is very strong. In fact, many great people in history they couldn’t adapt to their society and weren’t socialized very well in some ways. For example, the Albert Einstein and Beethoven , Einstein’s IQ was very high, but his childhood didn’t get any benefit from this merit. Actually, since his poor school performance and low EQ, his teacher and classmates thought he is a feebleminded person and thus isolating him. Beethoven even didn’t know how to fit to the society all his life since his illness and temper. He had no wife and good friends, but all these things didn’t prevent them from contributing to their society. Thus we can know, achievements can not attained just by our ability to get socialized or meet all the rules of the society, it is a thing need our real capacity and endeavor.（感觉和上一段的论述，重复，显得多余，可以和上一段合并，共同论述会好一些）

Second, I don’t think people now still don’t know how to instruct their children to construct a better society, on the contrary, I do realize that our society is becoming better and better in most aspects. It is commonly believe that a better society is the society which is richer in economy and more tolerant to all the people than previous time. These advancement we can see using our eyes and hearts, now our living condition is better than ever before.
这段的论述不够充分，应该加上一些实例


最后，觉得这篇文章的结构不完整，没有结尾段的总结。中间的论述有的显得重复累赘，缺失一些事例加强自己的论证。