Issue130_彼岸小组第二次作业_by McNeil

McNeilUID: 2272415

TOPIC: ISSUE130 - "How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."

The socialization of children plays a vital role in the determination of the society's destiny and we had not learned how to raised children. The author claims so in a negative attitude that it is difficult to bring about a better society. As the initial thought when first finish reading the statement, we need to research the way to raise children in a systematic and comprehensive way in order to achieve the goal of social development. In certain sense, I agree insofar with the speaker's opinion which the socialization of children could bring their basic needs and supply when they grow up. However, a much more noticeable point could be raised that only focusing on the socialization of the children were definitely not sufficient; we should help the children to construct their own personality and place much emphasis on the moral disciplines during the cultivation.

Indeed, how the children are socialized today is of enormous imperativeness in the children cultivation and social development. Due to the proper socialization of children, the society could at least have opportunity to progress in spite of raise a large number of adult which their basic need could not be met. The modern family structure determines that children have got limited time to contact with the society and person with the similar age, most of their energy were concentrated on the homework, TV show or video games. In this sense, most children's character is lonely and shy. Also, in another aspect, the high technology had cause the contemporary children lack of the basic living ability. When they grow older, both their family and the society do not want to see a great number people who cannot take care of themselves, then how do we expect them to develop the society? Thus, the socialization of the children is the basic requirement to raise the children and develop the society.

However, only ensuring the socialization of the children is not sufficient to bring about a better society. The whole society was made up by individuals and the character or personality of every individual has formed up as the spirit of the society and the whole society's spirit has also influenced the fellow citizens all the time. If the individual has lack of the personality and only be shaped by the society, the whole society's character would be lack of diversity which would definitely be away of progressing, no matter on the material or psychic level. In this sense, the children's personality should draw enough attention of us because the personality is of direct relationship with creativity which is the main power of the society development.

Also, as another aspect of the psychic construction of children cultivation, the moral discipline should be treated properly when raising children. Nowadays, children had acquired high-quality education but the morality part was always unpopular to the children and overlooked by the educator. Many juvenile criminals occurred due to the lack of moral education. Moreover, as the children grow up, if their morality is not progressing by the accumulation of knowledge and experience, it would horrible that a person with low level morality
that
ironically has a high level knowledge and be a definitely unstable factor and a hidden threat of social development.

From the analysis made above, I commit the optimal solution to bring about a better society is not only caring about how children are socialized, but also place much emphasis on the morality and personality of the children from the view based on the relationship between personal development and social progression.


希望这次没有上次说的那个格式问题，这次是在别人的电脑上交的作业

希望大家狠拍，不顾颜面的，谢谢大家。

最后：希望这个小组能振奋起来，大家一起加油！

choupgheadUID: 2969431

The socialization of children plays a vital role in the determination of the society's destiny and we had not learned how to raised children. The author claims so in a negative attitude that it is difficult to bring about a better society. As the initial thought when first finish reading the statement, we need to research the way to raise children in a systematic and comprehensive way in order to achieve the goal of social development. In certain sense, I agree insofar with the speaker's opinion which the socialization of children could bring their basic needs and supply when they grow up. However, a much more noticeable point could be raised that only focusing on the socialization of the children were definitely not sufficient; we should help the children to construct their own personality and place much emphasis on the moral disciplines during the cultivation.(语言很好，但是觉得作为一个开头145字有点太长了。。可以简单一点。不然前面说多了后面再论述也略显重复。)

Indeed, how the children are socialized today is of enormous imperativeness in the children cultivation and social development. Due to the proper socialization of children, the society could at least have opportunity to progress in spite of raise a large number of adult which their basic need could not be met. The modern family structure
(什么样的结构，说清楚，否则我们就不知道为什么会导致下面这些)determines that children have got limited time to contact with the society and person with the(at a) similar age, most of their energy were concentrated on the homework, TV show or video games. In this sense, most children's character is lonely and shy.
（大部分从何而来，我没发现现在大部分孩子都是孤独害羞的啊）Also, in another aspect, the high technology had cause the contemporary children lack of the basic living ability.（这里也让人看不懂，高科技=让孩子缺少基本生活能力，其中过渡不能省，虽然我们读者可以去猜其中的原因，但是不要这样） When they grow older, both their family and the society do not want to see a great number people who cannot take care of themselves, then how do we expect them to develop the society（这两句的逻辑也有问题家庭和社会不愿意看到他们不能照顾自己和then后面的关系不直接，如果说：他们不能照顾自己，然后then怎样还能指望他们发展社会呢？这才是正常的逻辑）? Thus, the socialization of the children is the basic requirement to raise the children and develop the society.

However, only ensuring the socialization of the children is not sufficient to bring about a better society. The whole society was made up by individuals and the character or personality of every individual has formed up as the spirit of the society and the whole society's spirit has also influenced the fellow citizens all the time. If the individual has lack of the personality and only be shaped by the society, the whole society's character would be lack （换个词呗 看见貌似4次了）of diversity which would definitely be away of progressing, no matter on the material or psychic level.（最好在这里举一个实例） In this sense, the children's personality should draw enough attention of us because the personality is of direct relationship with creativity（这俩怎样直接的关系，我怎么没觉得直接啊？） which is the main power of the society development.

Also, as another aspect of the psychic construction of children cultivation, the moral discipline should be treated properly when raising children. Nowadays, children had acquired high-quality education but the morality part was always unpopular to the children and overlooked by the educator. Many juvenile criminals occurred due to the lack of moral education.（都用了many了就随便举一个例子呗？） Moreover, as the children grow up, if their morality is not progressing by （with?）the accumulation of knowledge and experience, it would horrible that a person with low level morality
that
ironically has a high level knowledge and be a definitely（过于肯定了） unstable factor and a hidden threat of social development.

From the analysis made above, I commit the optimal solution to bring about a better society is not only caring about how children are socialized, but also place much emphasis on the morality and personality of the children from the view based on the relationship between personal development and social progression.
（作者对于语言的驾驭能力比较出色，而且有话可说。 希望以后在逻辑层次多加注意，毕竟AW还是逻辑说话的，切忌不可想当然。 而且，如果没有记错的话，这一整篇文章都没有一个实例，例子是最好的证明，希望以后注意）