issue244 "Most societies...admidre them" 大家指正

木耳UID: 123036

In this busy, packed and dull world, people’s most important concerning is how to make a living. They work assiduously to make money, to support their family, to purchase houses and cars. Hardly one common individual knows who their greatest thinkers are，not mention to take them seriously. Admittedly, in some cases, people claim that they admire the greatest thinkers; however, they actually know little about what the greatest thinkers’ thoughts are. The fact is, in history of human civilizations, most societies do not take their greatest thinkers seriously, even when the greatest thinkers are seemed to be respected.

Generally, whatever societies the greatest thinkers are in, they have similar characteristics, such as high intelligence, eccentric temperament, wide range of knowledge, and the most essential one: the deeply and often predicted thoughts, which is the product of real wisdom. On one hand, it is the thoughts that distinguish the greatest thinkers from the mass. On the other hand, it is also the thoughts, however correct and predicted, which cause these elites out of the mass’ sights and put them into an embarrassment in which few can understand them and their thoughts. A proper example is the passional German philosopher and poet Nietzche. Nietzche is a pioneer, whose profound exploration in philosophy influenced the descendants deeply. Yet his life is miserable and full of tragedies. Without money and job, Nietzche lived an impoverished life, which along with loneliness defeated him at last: he became insane when 45, and died 10 years later. Until that time, almost no one knew him or his thoughts. Even today, many people including some scholars call him mad philosopher.

In some worse cases, the greatest thinkers are even persecuted by their societies since the greatest thinkers always tend to have skeptical and critical thoughts, which the manipulators fear mostly and manipulated reluctant to accept. The reason is that once the advanced ideas, which are against the old ones, are accepted by mass, the domination or the present social system will in the danger of collapse. And at the same times, most people are reluctant to admit that what they believe in or cherish, however, always prejudice and rigid ideas set in people’s minds beforehand, are not the truth but falsehood or illusions. A case in point is the great astronomer Copernicus, who developed the theory that the earth and other planets revolve around the sun. Although the theory was the most advanced astronomy theory in that time, it hadn’t come out of press until the year before Copernicus’ death because of mass being strongly against it especially the powerful churches, which were afraid that such a theory would shake authority of theology.

In some specific period, for political reasons, thinker and intellectuals as a whole undergo ruthless treatment, such as the Culture Revolution from 1966 to 1976 in China. During those ten years, many great thinkers and intellectuals are forbidden to think and express their thoughts freely. Some of them even encountered physical torture. A crueler example is Qin Dynasty in China 2000 years ago. Yingzheng, the first emperor of China, sentenced the thinkers who held different political or social ideas from him to death. Moreover, he buried their writings.

It is the greatest thinkers’ tragedy not to be understood or even be persecuted. It is also the fact that human beings are always shortsighted, sometimes even foolish. Nevertheless, what is truth will never change itself or disappear along with the elapsing of time however strong the falsehood seems to be. Hence, though almost all the greatest thinkers are hermits, some of them may be even the prisoners in their societies; they would gain their perpetual lives through their glaring

木耳UID: 123036

最后少了一个词：thoughts.
呵呵

木耳UID: 123036

靠，只能自己回了。要不就被淹了！
那位大牛看一下？

自我自在UID: 142339

In this busy, packed and dull world, people’s most important concerning is how to make a living. They work assiduously to make money, to support their family, to purchase houses and cars. Hardly one common individual knows who their greatest thinkers are，not mention to take them seriously. Admittedly, in some cases, people claim that they admire the greatest thinkers; however, they actually know little about what the greatest thinkers’ thoughts are. The fact is, in history of human civilizations, most societies do not take their greatest thinkers seriously, even when the greatest thinkers are seemed(去掉’are’, seem是系动词 ) to be respected.

Generally, whatever societies the greatest thinkers are in, they have similar characteristics, such as high intelligence, eccentric temperament, wide range of knowledge, and the most essential one: the deeply and often predicted thoughts, which is the product of real wisdom. On one hand, it is the thoughts that distinguish the greatest thinkers from the mass. On the other hand, it is also the thoughts, however correct and predicted, which （其实在这里用that要好些，才是强调句的对仗，与上一句相对照用which,就只是一个定于从句而已）cause these elites out of the mass’ sights and put them into an embarrassment in which few can understand them and their thoughts. A proper example is the passional German philosopher and poet Nietzche. Nietzche is a pioneer, whose profound exploration in philosophy influenced the descendants deeply. Yet his life is miserable and full of tragedies. Without money and job, Nietzche lived an impoverished life, which along with loneliness defeated him at last: he became insane when 45, and died 10 years later. Until that time, almost no one knew him or his thoughts. Even today, many people including some scholars call him mad philosopher.

In some worse cases, the greatest thinkers are even persecuted by their societies since the greatest thinkers always tend to have skeptical and critical thoughts, which the manipulators fear mostly and manipulated reluctant to accept. The reason is that once the advanced ideas, which are against the old ones, are accepted by mass, the domination or the present social system will in the danger of collapse. And at the same times(time), most people are reluctant to admit that what they believe in or cherish, however, always prejudice and rigid ideas set in people’s minds beforehand, are not the truth but falsehood or illusions. A case in point(good!)is the great astronomer Copernicus, who developed the theory that the earth and other planets revolve around the sun. Although the theory was the most advanced astronomy theory in that time, it hadn’t come out of press until the year before Copernicus’ death because of mass being strongly against it especially the powerful churches, which were afraid that such a theory would shake authority of theology.

In some specific period, for political reasons, thinker and intellectuals as a whole undergo ruthless treatment, such as the Culture Revolution from 1966 to 1976 in China. During those ten years, many great thinkers and intellectuals are forbidden to think and express their thoughts freely. Some of them even encountered physical torture. A crueler example is Qin Dynasty in China 2000 years ago. Yingzheng, the first emperor of China, sentenced the thinkers who held different political or social ideas from him to death. Moreover, he buried their writings.

It is the greatest thinkers’ tragedy not to be understood or even be persecuted. It is also the fact that human beings are always shortsighted, sometimes even foolish. Nevertheless, what is truth will never change itself or disappear along with the elapsing of time however strong the falsehood seems to be. Hence, though almost all the greatest thinkers are hermits, some of them may be even the prisoners in their societies; they would gain their perpetual lives through their glaring thoughts.

还是说理要是能再多点就好，如果不行，也可以用这些例子充实，不错。
不过在写例子时可以更往题目上靠就好了，描述“mistreated”
已经不错了。：）

feier521UID: 109747

In this busy, packed and dull world, people’s most important concerning is how to make a living. They work assiduously to make money, to support their family, to purchase houses and cars. Hardly one common individual knows who their greatest thinkers are（hardly does one common individual know…），not mention to take them seriously. Admittedly, in some cases, people claim that they admire the greatest thinkers; however, they actually know little about what the greatest thinkers’ thoughts are. The fact is, in history of human civilizations, most societies do not take their greatest thinkers seriously, even when the greatest thinkers are seemed to be respected.

Generally, whatever societies the greatest thinkers are in, they have similar characteristics, such as high intelligence, eccentric temperament, wide range of(wide-range好点) knowledge, and the most essential one: the deeply and often predicted（？“可被预知的”不等于“可预知未来的”insightful OR incisive如何？） thoughts, which is（are） the product of real wisdom. On one hand, it is the thoughts that distinguish the greatest thinkers from the mass. On the other hand, it is also the thoughts, however correct and predicted, which cause these elites out of the mass’ sights and put them into an embarrassment in which few can understand them and their thoughts. A proper example is the passional German philosopher and poet Nietzche. Nietzche is（注意时态） a pioneer, whose profound exploration in philosophy influenced the descendants deeply. Yet his life is（？） miserable and full of tragedies. Without money and job, Nietzche lived an impoverished life, which along with loneliness defeated him at last（这样写如何？Impoverished life, along with loneliness, defeated him at last）: he became insane when 45, and died 10 years later. Until that time, almost no one knew him or his thoughts. Even today, many people including some scholars call him mad philosopher.
In some worse cases, the greatest thinkers are（时态） even persecuted by their societies since the greatest thinkers always tend to have skeptical and critical thoughts, which the manipulators （？这个词可能不大合适）fear(时态) mostly and manipulated reluctant to accept. The reason is that once the advanced ideas, which are against the old ones, are accepted by mass, the domination or the present social system will（be） in the danger of collapse. And at the same time(s), most people are（？） reluctant to admit that what they believe in or cherish, however, （was）always prejudice and rigid ideas set in people’s minds beforehand, are（and was）not the truth but falsehood or illusions. A case in point is the great astronomer Copernicus, who developed the theory that the earth and other planets revolve around the sun. Although the theory was the most advanced astronomy theory in that time, it hadn’t come out of press until the year before Copernicus’ death because of mass being strongly against it especially the powerful churches, which were afraid that such a theory would shake authority of theology.

In some specific period, for political reasons, thinker and intellectuals as a whole undergo(注意时态) ruthless treatment, such as the Culture Revolution from 1966 to 1976 in China. During those ten years, many great thinkers and intellectuals are (?) forbidden to think and express their thoughts freely. Some of them even encountered physical torture. A crueler example is Qin Dynasty in China 2000 years ago. Yingzheng, the first emperor of China, sentenced the thinkers who held different political or social ideas from him to death. Moreover, he buried their writings.

It is the greatest thinkers’ tragedy not to be understood or even be persecuted. It is also the fact that human beings are always shortsighted, sometimes even foolish（呵呵，这句话不可以这么说，只能说thinkers 的思想超前性,人们无法理解。）. Nevertheless, what is truth will never change itself or disappear along with the elapsing of time however strong the falsehood seems to be. Hence, though almost all the greatest thinkers are hermits, some of them may be even the prisoners in their societies（时态！！）; they would gain their perpetual lives through their glaring thoughts.

写的真是不错，用词和句式，论证的也挺好。但是要注意时态，论述例子时，要用过去时！＋U 啊

木耳UID: 123036

你的意思是论证例子都要用一般过去式？我一直以为一般是要用现在时的。谢啦！^_^

iamyichunUID: 176058

I have a question
why mentioned Nietzche?
obviously "his society" (his contemporaries) did not admire him

木耳UID: 123036

最初由 iamyichun 发布
[B]I have a question
why mentioned Nietzche?
obviously "his society" (his contemporaries) did not admire him [/B]

你可能是没有理解题目吧？
这是早期发的文章，没有把题目抄全
前面有个not的，呵呵

genie05UID: 30358

hehe  ~~好玩~

zhengandhong135UID: 164542

文章是 从那几个方面论证的，感觉很 不清晰