寄托天下
查看: 1466|回复: 1
打印 上一主题 下一主题

[作文] daily writing 梦溪笔谈 [复制链接]

Rank: 1

声望
0
寄托币
65
注册时间
2010-11-23
精华
0
帖子
1
跳转到指定楼层
楼主
发表于 2012-2-23 22:07:53 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Two people can become good friends even if one of them has more money than the other
When it comes to friend, the majority of people believe that friend is a part of lifetime. If two people have many same interest and hobby that they would became two friends. But increasing number of people are beginning to realize that friends is not seems to be the simplest way in communicating with others, especially one of them has less money than the other. However, from my perspective, two people should not complication that make good friend.

The first thing that I want to point out is that rules, especially moral rules, two friend honest with each other, they will be regarded as well-educated and earn more respect. Especially when the social network is becoming more and more sophisticate, in other words, if they not wholeheartedly with each other that others person will far away from their.

More importantly, friendship not measure with money. One of them has more money than the other. However, this not can affect their friendship, they can help with each other when encountered emergency. For example, Lily and Lucy is good friend in the university, last week, Lucy’s father had accident and broke his leg, her mother not had work and she has a little brother. So she doesn’t have much more money to go on the study in the university. Her friend’s Lily’s father has a company; she knows that her good friend has trouble in her lifetime; she let her mother to work in her father’s company and paying her tuition fees. They not feel unhappy from economical different, one of them have more money than other can help other when the other has trouble.

In view of the factors present above, personally, I believe that friendship not complicate in two good friends that the money not to keep up their friendship.
打倒IBT,打倒G
0 0

使用道具 举报

Rank: 5Rank: 5

声望
55
寄托币
1655
注册时间
2012-2-22
精华
0
帖子
304

2015 US-applicant

沙发
发表于 2012-2-24 17:56:29 |只看该作者

RE: daily writing 梦溪笔谈

1# zxbaihe
我不会上传附件。。所以就贴在上面了~
When it comes to friend, the majority of peoplebelieve that friend(friend是可数名词,因而改作friends are a part of one’s life更为妥帖。) is a part of lifetime.If two people have many same interest(interest为可数名词。改为interests) andhobby(hobby为可数名词。改为hobbies), that(that要删去,见if条件状语从句的语法。) they wouldbecame two friends. But increasing number of people are beginning to realizethat friends is not seems to be the simplest way in communicating with others,especially one of them has less money than the other. However, from my perspective,two people should not complication
(n.1. 使更复杂化(或更困难)的事物2. 〈医〉并发症.should后面应该跟的是动词。) that make good friend.这句话的意思是什么?
The first thing that I want to point out is thatrules, especially moral rules, two friend honest with each other, they will beregarded as well-educated and earn more respect. Especially when the socialnetwork is becoming more and more sophisticate, in other words, if they notwholeheartedly with each other that others person will far away from their friendship.


More importantly, friendship is notmeasure with money. One of them has more money than the other. However, this can not affecttheir friendship, they can help with each other when encountered emergency. Forexample, Lily and Lucy is good friend in the university, last week, Lucy’sfather had accident and broke his leg, her mother did not have work andshe has a little brother. So she doesn’t have much more money to go on with her studyin the university.Her friend’s Lily’sLucy的朋友就是Lily了,所以只要说Lily’s father就可以了,否则这个关系不太对哦) father has a company; she knows that her goodfriend has trouble in her lifetime; she lets her mother to work inher father’s company and pays her tuition fees. They does not feel unhappyfrom economical different, one of them have more money than other can helpother when the other has trouble.
- J: m/ M, e) y
In view of the factors present above, personally,I believe that friendship not complicate in two good friends and that themoney will not tokeep up their friendship.

修改总结:我觉得你的字数还可以再多写一些,当然第一篇是一个好的开始,要坚持下去咯~语法错误有些多,尤其是否定句式,似乎很多都需要修改。加油呢~

Revised by xiaogalayy
加油呐!~

使用道具 举报

RE: daily writing 梦溪笔谈 [修改]

问答
Offer
投票
面经
最新
精华
转发
转发该帖子
daily writing 梦溪笔谈
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-1337159-1-1.html
复制链接
发送
回顶部