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[i习作temp] issue113 人家的…第一次…应该是…惨不忍睹啦…求指导先谢谢啦 [复制链接]

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发表于 2012-3-20 20:11:09 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
题目:ISSUE113 - Claim: The surest indicator of a great nation is not the achievements of its rulers, artists, or scientists.
Reason: The surest indicator of a great nation is actually the welfare of all its people.

In the history, one may discovers a fact that all the great nations would be powerful in a multiple way - all these countries were highly developed in economy, strong in military, flourish in culture and also, love and enjoyed by citizens. Thus, I would not totally agree with the claim given, though I'd like to say that the reason is basically convincing.

One may argue that without happiness of public, a country could hardly be called as a "great" nation, and I would go with this. No matter how brilliant the accomplishment in politics, art and science one nation has, these successes would not stably stand without the welfare of the most. If the people of one nation struggle with starvation and epidemics, a great scientific discovery or a piece of imposing oil painting just seem to be meaningless for no one would, and could, spare any time or effort to appreciate these achievements. A politic leader who reaches the top of his or her field without concerning the welfare of the most might be called a tyranny. It is true that the economy base determines the superstructure, which is analogous to this case. Thus, the well-being of its people is the basis of a nation trying to be named "great".

However, sole success in winning people's well-being would not be enough to meet the requirement of greatness, thus welfare of public would not appropriately be the "surest" indicator. Nations located in middle-east are known as land of wealth, yet these countries could not be treated as "great nation", for their lacking of politic and martial power, artistic and scientific achievements, and the spirit of independence and aggression, a factor much more significant than the former. Achievements of rulers, artists and scientists are indispensible to a nation's greatness for the reason that these are historically seen as symbols remarking a nation which is great. Speaking of the greatness of ancient Greece and Rome, galaxy of philosophers and scholars comes to one's mind.
The Han Dynasty, one of the greatest period in ancient China, is complimented for its undefeated cavaliers and imposing masterpieces of poem and music. Another example is the USA. Paralleling to its citizen's liberty and courage are America's international influence, highly developed technology and multifaceted artistic product. These achievements are also seen as indicator of greatness partly because these are more easily noticed and more representative than the welfare of the mass of individual, since achievements show a nation's level of development, both material and spiritual.


In sum, to fit the definition of "greatness", a nation could not merely rely on the well-being of its people, which is just one factor reflecting a country's strength. True greatness could be better defined by a comprehensive success in the welfare of the public accompany with the achievements of politics, art and science.

首先字数不多,470左右,其次这个不太抽象的题目,又是偏对比型论证的,感觉很难写深刻,于是中间段就两段,reason claim各一段了……信心受挫了求指导,先谢谢了!
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RE: issue113 人家的…第一次…应该是…惨不忍睹啦…求指导先谢谢啦 [修改]
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issue113 人家的…第一次…应该是…惨不忍睹啦…求指导先谢谢啦
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