issue197

for your sakeUID: 141183

197"The material progress and well-being of one country are necessarily connected to the material progress and well-being of all other countries."
Noticing the trend of accelerated speed of globalization, we are feeling and holding the pulse of our modern society. This trend, by forming a delicate web upon which all the nations in the world depend,  has linked the world together. I fundamentally agree with the speaker, that from a broader point of view, the material progress and the well being of one country are connected to other countries.
The unpreventable trend of globalization has made it a reality that every country must depend on others, politically or economically. Our modern society features its enhanced extent of competition. So does the world wide economical market. Why some of the trade barriers that set up by the developing countries to protect their state-owned company ended up with these companies resource--wasted and inefficient, enriching their corrupted elites and executives, while at the mean time, impoverishing the mass population? To my perspective, the trade barrier has prevented these companies from interacting with the outside world. Lacking certain extent of external competition, they have no motivation to bring their products standards to the international level. This case well illustrates that in our modern world, one country could never make considerable progress without other countries.
Doubtlessly, America is the most powerful and strong country in the world, maybe, ever existed in the history, and it is always the hope of other nations to get out of their economical depressions. History proves that the prosperity of the American economy would propel the pace of the word-wide economy due to its inherited nature.  In the 1990s, when American economy is rising like a roaring rocket, with its domestic demands for the imported goods expanded exponentially, it is the entire world that finally benefit. Other nations have to produce much more goods with certain quality levels to meet the demands of the America. It is the boom of America that leads the road to the success of many other countries in the world. From this case we could perceive that the material progress of a powerful country could make considerable contribution to that of the whole world.
Further more, the condition of well being of a country could exert a strong influence to other countries too. As is known to all, the impoverished countries and places are the hotbed for the dictators. By abandoning the principle of democracy, it is the dictators that always wage aggressive actions to other nations. One needs to look no further than the break out of the World War 2. When the national well being state of Germany degenerated to the greatest extent, with beggar everywhere, the whole economical system teetering on the verge of extinction, the nation must figure out a possible solution to tackle these problems. Unfortunately, Hilter took advantage of this chance and promised the majority that under his control, the nation could embark on its way of resurrection. In order to realize his promise "quickly and effectively", German set out to prepare the war. Finally, it was all the world that suffered. Tracing back to the trigger of this tragedy, we find out that it is one nation's degeneracy in well being that cause the deterioration in well being of all the nations.
In sum, the speaker is insightful and prudent enough in pointing out that the well being and the material progress of one country  firmly depends on that of other nations. We should put considerable emphasis on this notion and capitalize on it to the greatest extent , making sure that  our whole world would muscling forward in every aspect.

QQsugarUID: 136441

Noticing the trend of accelerated speed of globalization, we are feeling and holding (superfluous term; It would appear to be concise if you would omit one) the pulse of our modern society. This trend, by forming a delicate web upon which all the nations in the world depend, has linked the world together. I fundamentally agree with the speaker, that from a broader point of view, the material progress and the well being of one country are connected to other countries. (Here you successful evince your point that the progress or well being in one country would more or less be connected to that of other countries.)
The unpreventable(好象是贬义词哦) trend of globalization has made it a reality that every country must depend on others, politically or economically. Our modern society features its enhanced extent of competition. So does the world wide economical market. Why some of the trade barriers that set up by the developing countries to protect their state-owned company ended up with these companies resource--wasted and inefficient, enriching their corrupted elites and executives, while at the mean time, impoverishing the mass population? To my perspective, the trade barrier has prevented these companies from interacting with the outside world. Lacking certain extent of external competition, they have no motivation to bring their products standards to the international level. This case well illustrates that in our modern world, one country could never make considerable progress without other countries.（你在段首说了all countries are correlated either in politics or in economy, 建议你在后面就从这两个方面来讨论哦，这样条理就清晰多了）
Doubtlessly, America is the most powerful and strong country in the world, maybe, ever existed in the history, and it is always the hope of other nations to get out of their economical depressions. History proves that the prosperity of the American economy would propel the pace of the word-wide economy due to its inherited nature. In the 1990s, when American economy is rising like a roaring rocket, with its domestic demands for the imported goods expanded exponentially, it is the entire world that finally benefit. Other nations have to produce much more goods with certain quality levels to meet the demands of the America. It is the boom of America that leads the road to the success of many other countries in the world. From this case we could perceive that the material progress of a powerful country could make considerable contribution to that of the whole world.
Further more, the condition of well being of a country could exert a strong influence to other countries too. As is known to all, the impoverished countries and places are the hotbed for the dictators. By abandoning the principle of democracy, it is the dictators that always wage aggressive actions to other nations. One needs to look no further than the break out of the World War 2. When the national well being state of Germany degenerated to the greatest extent, with beggar everywhere, the whole economical system teetering on the verge of extinction, the nation must figure out a possible solution to tackle these problems. Unfortunately, Hilter took advantage of this chance and promised the majority that under his control, the nation could embark on its way of resurrection. In order to realize his promise "quickly and effectively", German set out to prepare the war. Finally, it was all the world that suffered. Tracing back to the trigger of this tragedy, we find out that it is one nation's degeneracy in well being that cause the deterioration in well being of all the nations.
In sum, the speaker is insightful and prudent enough in pointing out that the well being and the material progress of one country firmly depends on that of other nations. We should put considerable emphasis on this notion and capitalize on it to the greatest extent , making sure that our whole world would muscling forward in every aspect.
修改修改还是挺好的，加油吧。

for your sakeUID: 141183

谢谢啊:)