21号最后一次机会了，求大神帮忙批改作文！！

jayyao1560UID：3286450

题目：Technological progress in the last centuryhad negative effect, despite its remarkable contribution to human society. Towhat extent do you agree or disagree

In contemporarysociety, heated debate has been going on about whether technological advancehad the baneful impact in the last century, despite it also had the positiveimpact on humankind society. Overwhelming people recommend that the developmentof technology has some negative impacts on environment, compared with theopposite idea. In the context, I would like to explore the two sides (or bothview points) in the following paragraphs.

The technologicalprogress has been made a baneful influence. The development of technology hasbeen made some environment problems, for instance global warming. As the technologicalprogress makes the factory to enhance their productivity, because of this, thefactory will cause too much contamination than before. It is true that the developmentof technology seems to make the environment problem become increasingly worse.

The technologicalprogress makes a positive implication. The technological advance has beenmaking humankind live in an information overload time. The technologicaladvance promote some innovations to appear, such as Ipad2 and Ipone4 humancould use it for telecommunications and use it like a laptop, which could makehuman’s life become more efficient and convenient. Hence, the development oftechnology has beneficial to the human society.

In my opinion, Ipropose that individuals are not suppose to judge the implication oftechnological advance on coverage. Despite the technological progress ispredicted to make more baneful influence on next century, but human is supposeto looking for a way to tackle it, such as use eco-friendly power source toreduce the contamination. Therefore, humanity is suppose to preserve theenvironment, and continue to develop the technology.

Human only haveone earth, a good environment and the development of technology are the basicfactors for our happiness life.

bqianaUID：193168

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jayyao1560UID：3286450

2# bqiana
麻烦问下您，我这边大作文的主要问题是什么？

bqianaUID：193168

句型和语法比较弱
模版痕迹很显眼这是致命伤

jayyao1560UID：3286450

4# bqiana
恩，非常感谢