本人太菜了，恳请各位大神给修改一下作文吧~~~非常感谢！！！

exiuUID: 2640950

The government has announced that it plans to build a new university. Some people think that your community would be a good place to locate the university. Compare the advantages and disadvantages of establishing a new university in your community. Use specific details in your discussion

With the development of society, an expanding number of people are of the significance of higher education. Accordingly a new university is supposed to built according to the announcement issued by the government. There is a growing awareness of both the positive and negative influences that the construction plan brings to our community. Admittedly, there may be one or two disadvantages to this establishment program; however, I believe that there are far more advantages.

To begin with, by establishing the university in our community, it will be convenient to study. It usually takes almost two hours for neighborhood to go to a small library and it is time-consuming. If the new university was built in our community, we would only spend a few minutes to get to the university for reading. Then we may use the saving time to accomplish other meaningful things such as going for exercise or surfing the internet. Besides, some parents are anxious about their children`s study. Since parents devote themselves to work, they have little time to tutor their children. In order to improve children`s study, for example, it is convenient for parents to recruit a tutorial to help their children with their homework.

Another advantage to establish a new university in our community is that it will afford remarkably ample opportunities of employment to community residents. A recent survey conducted by officials reveals that there are eleven people who lost their work and cannot support their livelihood in our community. I believe that they will obtain opportunity to get rid of plight in the newly established university. For instance, they may become a constructor of the new university. What`s more, they can also endeavor to
other opportunities, such as selling books or operating a resteraunt, to earn a fixed income. Only through their effort to work will they live a desirable life.

Considerable though the advantages that to build a new university in our community leads to are, the disadvantages are also obvious, when the environment is taken into consideration. A case in point is that what most people considering about is that their living circumstance will be definitely devastated and contaminated. Also, anew university will surely attract some exotic people search for jobs and stay in community, and because of the unfamiliar of the quality and characteristic of those people from other places, it may cause an imperceptible risk of criminals.

Although I agree that there may be a couple of drawbacks to building a new university in our community, I maintain that the disadvantages far outweigh them. To construct a new university will increase the employment and the convenience the university will bring cannot be measured. From my personal perspective, these are the two significant goals to consider. Consequently, I feel that it is advisable to build a new university in our community.

exiuUID: 2640950

1# exiu
怎么没人理会呢？？？？?

Aria~UID: 3296962

The government has announced that it plans to build a new university. Some people think that your community would be a good place to locate the university. Compare the advantages and disadvantages of establishing a new university in your community. Use specific details in your discussion
With the development of society, an expanding number of people are of the significance of higher education. 这个写的不对
Accordingly a new university is supposed to built （此处被动语态没有be）according to the announcement issued by the government. There is a growing awareness of both the positive and negative influences(可数吗？) that the construction plan brings to our community. Admittedly, there may be one or two disadvantages to(of合适吧) this establishment program; however, I believe that there are far more advantages.
9 s& ]& b1 e/ f5 [
To begin with, by establishing the university in our community, it will be convenient to study. It usually takes almost two hours for neighborhood to go to a small library and（建议用定语从句——which is time-consuming） it is time-consuming. If the new university was built in our community, we would only spend a few minutes to get to the university for reading. Then we may use the saving time to accomplish other meaningful things such as going for exercise or surfing the internet. Besides, some parents are anxious about their children`s study. Since parents devote themselves to work, they have little time to tutor their children. In order to improve children`s study, for example, it is convenient for parents to recruit a tutorial to help their children with their homework.
/ W. N  r4 Q& W
Another advantage to establish a new university in our community is that it will afford remarkably ample opportunities of employment to community residents. A recent survey conducted by officials reveals that there are eleven people who lost their work and cannot support their livelihood ?in our community. I believe that they will obtain opportunity to get rid of plight in the newly established university. For instance, they may become a constructor of the new university. What`s more, they can also endeavor to" h( c# x% Y3 w) I6 G# i
other opportunities, such as selling books or operating a resteraunt, to earn a fixed income. Only through their effort to work will they live a desirable life.7 R6 p$ z  y; u3 F( S) l

Considerable though the advantages that to build a new university in our community leads to are, the disadvantages are also obvious, when the environment is taken into consideration. A case in point is that what most people considering about is that their living circumstance will be definitely devastated and contaminated. Also, anew university will surely attract some exotic people search for jobs and stay in community, and because of the unfamiliar of the quality and characteristic of those people from other places, it may cause an imperceptible risk of criminals.
4 l. [, B3 @& ^+ V3 }% {
Although I agree that there may be a couple of drawbacks to building a new university in our community, I maintain that the disadvantages  是advantages far outweigh them. To construct a new university will increase the employment and the convenience the university will bring cannot be measured. From my personal perspective, these are the two significant goals to consider. Consequently, I feel that it is advisable to build a new university in our community.

个人认为文章字数有点过多 关于disadvantages的部分 我认为不必要单独分出一段来写，只要简单叙述一下，毕竟这不是你的重点。
我写的也不好 望楼主批判继承 thank you

exiuUID: 2640950

3# Aria~
非常感谢你的修改。就字数而言戴云教主说越多越好，文章结构使用的2-1，推荐你看一下戴云的网络课堂，会有收获的。一起加油！！！

Aria~UID: 3296962

个人认为 所谓的专家秘诀并非对所有人都适用，更重要的方面应该是夯实和完善作文论证观点，不应该过分重视码字  我想请问作者这篇文章是在三十分钟写下来的吗 如果不是的话 我建议你还是应该在平时练习的过程中 按照考场标准要求自己 否则考试时候可能会比较困难吧

秋雨荆州UID: 2903781

4# exiu