TPO6作文，求评分，求批评指教

100jessicaUID: 3250530

TPO 06

综合写作：
The lecture disagrees with the critics made in the reading passage about the communal online encyclopedias in several respects.
First, the claim that the online encyclopedias are lack of acadamic credentials are too exacting. The lecture argues that there exists no encyclopedia in the world which is free from errors. Even the traditional one tthat was written by experts are haunted by inevitable faults. Instend of blaming the online encyclopedias just like the passage does, we should praise them because since they are open to a whole community, changes of errors can be easily made at anytime.
Second, it is untrue that online encyclopedias give hackers the opportunity to fabricate or corrupt the information. The lecture presents some protecting strategies which have already been applied on those sites. For example, a special format is established in order to ensure the reliability of certain facts. Moreover, special editors are hired to make sure that all the changes of information  are under a proper supervision.
Finally, the accuse that the communal online encyclopedias focus more on trivias is unjustified since on one has the right to decide what is worth knowing. Due to the limited space and inadequate participants, the traditional encyclopedias reflect only the interests of a small group of people. On the contrast, the online encyclopedias today are a reflection of the general public's interests as a result of collective choice. Their diversity of topics provide a great varity which attracts more people.

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Independent:
Topic：Life today is easier and more comfotable than your grandparents were children.

I agree that nowadays people enjoy a better life quality than people did during our grandparents' childhood. Time has changed and so did the way people live.
First of all, due to the economic development, almost all people are now free from the threat of hunger and poverty that haunted our grandparents when they were young.  For instance, my grandpa used to tell me that he and his brothers were forced to share one apple a day because the fresh fruit was a precious thing at that time. Children who enjoy the abundant fruit supply today probably find that kind of stories unimaginable and even ridiculous.
Second, the freedom and democracy that we enjoy today are much more real than before. Feeling comfortable in our life does not only depend on the material level, but also on the mental and spiritual ones. When finding the circumstances in our grandparents' genertaion, we should feel quite satisfatory with having such a democrat sociey in which we are living now. Take the access to Internet as an example, our grandparents would never have imagined being able to surf on the web anywhere anytime you want and obtain unlimited flow of information from every corner of the world. Though there remains considerable fields waiting to be improved, it is better than the stagnation of development in the past.
Finally, for the last several decades, people's idea concerning the comfortableness of life has changed dramatically. In the period when our country was stiil severely short for people's basic needs, the definition of good life was naturally earning a living. On the contrary, today's people are free from the fear of starving to death, therefore, they have got the possiblity and the liberty of pursuing higher life goals. For example, people will spend quite a mount of money buying books or going to theaters which substantially elevate our living standards.

这样写行吗？对作文标准完全没有概念，心里很没底，求诸位指点。

吃狗粮的猫UID: 3103432

lz 考试的时候注意下拼写错误就好啦:loveliness: