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[主题活动] 燃烧的战火”作文互改小组作业贴,新鲜出炉A-113&I-22，求拍砖 [复制链接]

燕鱼小窝
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电梯直达

楼主

发表于 2012-9-6 20:59:28 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览

本帖最后由燕鱼小窝于 2012-10-29 19:29 编辑

9月6日
I-46

I-46 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (33 KB, 下载次数: 7)
A-60

A-60 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (35 KB, 下载次数: 3)
9.7
I-86

I-86 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (29.5 KB, 下载次数: 5)
9.9
I-104

I-104 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (29 KB, 下载次数: 2)
9.12
A-34

A-34 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (31 KB, 下载次数: 7)

10.14

A-5 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (32 KB, 下载次数: 2)

I-108 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (30.5 KB, 下载次数: 6)

10.27

A-7 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (32.5 KB, 下载次数: 0)

I-7 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (34 KB, 下载次数: 0)

10.28

A-41 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (31.5 KB, 下载次数: 0)

I-101 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (31.5 KB, 下载次数: 0)

10.29

I-22 by 燕鱼小窝.doc (31 KB, 下载次数: 0)

A-113 by 燕鱼小窝 .doc (31.5 KB, 下载次数: 0)

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xiesisiminerva
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沙发

发表于 2012-9-6 21:09:45 |只看该作者

恩恩，最近有点松懈了，我帮你改。

双非DIY美硕申请总结

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xiesisiminerva
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板凳

发表于 2012-9-6 21:18:30 |只看该作者

稍微改了一下

I-46_by_燕鱼小窝.doc

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IF YOU WANT SOMETHING, THE WHOLE UNIVERSE CONSPIRE TO HELP YOU ACHIEVE IT!
Ecology, plant science or Biochemistry, which one point to my future?

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燕鱼小窝
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地板

发表于 2012-9-6 21:51:08 |只看该作者

非常感谢！祝你915杀G成功！

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charlesliye
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5楼

发表于 2012-9-10 21:55:17 |只看该作者

This letter recommends a client to invest Consolidated Industries. To support this recommendation, the author points out three trends which may lead to the an increased demand of heating oil in for the company. However, the argument relies on a number ofis rife with unsubstantiated assumptions and is, therefore, it is unconvincing.
The first assumption is that 90 days is a relatively longer periodlong enough and the abnormal temperature below-normal is cold low enough to lead to the total increase of heating oil. But the author hasn’t provided enough evidences for thisdidn’t make it a cogent case. Though 90 days seems a long period, it should be contrast with may be shorter thanthe normal duration of cold days in this region and the average temperature might be even higher than other years.other days in heating season may be warmer than normal. If this is true, the total amount of heating oil may decrease. Or if perhaps the temperature is not so cold enough for citizens to increase the use of heating oil though it’s colder than normal days in winter before. Without provide The author even hasn’t told us whether the amount of heating oil had increased last heating season, the argument is unwarranted.
The next assumption is that people in the region will continue to use heating oil as their main fuel for heating. This is also unwarranted. Even if the number of homes would raise and the climate temperature is will progress like the forecasters predictedcold enough, the citizens may turn to use other fuels to heat their homes like electricity, solar energy etc.. It’s a trend that the new buildings are equipped by modern facilities using more clean and efficient fuels.
Building upon weak substantiation the author claimsThe third assumption is that Consolidated Industries will should raise its investment of heating oil. However, the author doesn’t offer its exact plan of heating oil production to prove this. Even if the total amount of heating oil would increase, the company might not raise its investment on heating oil. Because due to its major operation is retail sale, the increasing increased demand of heating oil may be satisfied by other companies which provide wholesale business,. the company might not raise its investment on heating oil .OrMoreover, Consolidated Industries may plan to expand its other major business instead of heating oil and even reducing its production of heating oil according to the whole company’s developmentlong term management strategy.
In conclusion, this argument is unpersuasive, to bolster it the author should provide more exact evidences to prove at leastsubstantiate all the unjustified assumptions mentioned above. The author should make sure that the three trends will lead to a total rise of usage amount of heating oil and Consolidated Industries will expand its production of heating oil. Otherwise it’s unwise for the client to invest on that company.

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