头一次写TOEFl作文，求修改

东北疯丫头UID：3453332

这是我头一次正式写托福作文，并非完全原创，只是想熟悉一下流程，之后会参加TOEFL写作互改小组，今天这篇麻烦大家给点意见，修改一下，300字对我来说真是写到词穷啊


Do you agree or disagree with following statement? People should not pay for public transportation.

In order to encourage more people to use public transportation ,it is suggested that city's public transportation should be made free to its residents. I agree because it will bring benefits to the environment and the city residents.
It can further reduce air pollution and relieve traffic jams. If canceling pays for public transportation, there are more and more people willing to use public transportation instead of driving their own cars. We can imagine how clear the road will be, because there are no cherry QQ or BMW. Less air pollution become possible because of less fossil fuels used. Global warming, Acid rains, Urban smog can't be seen frequently in our life. We can live more comfortable with fresh air.
This suggestion not only can reduce air pollution and relieve the traffic jams, but also save more money for the residents. All people can go out with free public transportation. With the time goes by, residents can save considerable money. They can use these money to travel to Paris, France and everywhere they want to go, buy toys for children, treadmills for husbands or wifes, delicious foods for good friends.
However, it also means more money cost for the bus companies. The bus companies have to buy fossil fuels for running buses. Paying salary for drivers is also unavoidable. So it is possible to make the bus companies into trouble because of the shortage of money. Bus companies' operation will put into discuss soon.
Admittedly, paying no money for public transportation does put pressure on the bus companies. However, if the government is in favor of the bus companies, for instance, giving finance help, there will be nothing to worry about.

ヤ.魔ポ☆.UID：3381952

ok~

东北疯丫头UID：3453332

ヤ.魔ポ☆. 发表于 2013-7-19 12:07
ok~

谢谢，看我的作文，你一定辛苦了，太感谢了

ヤ.魔ポ☆.UID：3381952

东北疯丫头 发表于 2013-7-19 14:13
谢谢，看我的作文，你一定辛苦了，太感谢了

没事~加油~