Issue130 第三篇。高频题 先看了一些范文，看看这次能不能死得好看点……多谢！

kingweckUID: 144209

终于写上500words了，不过没限时，呵呵！ :o

[B]Issue130 教育
"How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."[/B]

    As a famous saying goes "children are the future of a country", children are very important to the development of society. But can we say that "how children are socialized today determines the destiny of society"? Of course not. Human society is complicated and full of unpredicted changes. Not a single factor can affect the destiny of it. Besides, even assuming that people have known what to teach their children, I think they have not find the most proper way of doing so.

    First of all, human society is intricate as an ecosystem. In an ecosystem, there must be producers, consumers, decomposers, sunshine and environment, of whom no one can decide the destiny of this ecosystem exclusively. In the symbiotic system, lack of any link in the chain can destroy the totality. Similarly, the destiny of human society cannot be put on the shoulders of children. Groups of every age have their significant repercussions. Even we can say that adults are more able to determine the future of society. For example, in a war, kids do not have abilities to fight against lethal weapons or even protect themselves. It is the adult soldiers that decide kids' lives and the result of the war, which determines the destiny of countries involved in the war. In a word, the complexity of human society makes that there is not a single generation which is able to control the future completely.

    Secondly, up to the present, our society has highly civilized and socialized. People do find various advantageous abilities and superior characters for children to acquire and form, such as individuality, honesty, confidence, optimism, cooperation ability. Individuality enables children think creatively and innovatively and honesty is the basic rule for living in this world. Moreover, confidence and optimism prevent them from being misleaded by incorrect opinions and overwhelmed by difficulties and frustrations. Also, no one could survive in a competitive world by himself. Accordingly children should learn to cooperate with others. These abilities and characters are beneficial to them for all their lives. Besides these basic characters and abilities, some fundamental knowledge on science, arts, culture, history, and many other things are ought to be studied by children, as we all know.

    Unfortunately, adults have not yet got the most effective and successful methods to raise children, that is, to impart these abilities and characters to them. For example, in some developing countries, especially in Asia, heavy homework and strict exams occupy whole daily lives of students, who do not have spare time to join any sports or advantageous games practicing their leadership, coordinating and cooperation ability and so on. As a result, children live there miss many chances to develop their own individualities or interests which makes them less useful in their later lives. In USA, the situation is better, but there are still serious problems such as cohabitations, drugs, campus shooting and etc. Until we find a widely accepted and successful way of raising our children, we cannot settle these problems.

    In sum, how children are socialized cannot decide the destiny of society alone. It is dominated by everyone of us. Children is very important to our society and we should consider more about how to raise them.

imongUID: 140258

meloncollie已经帮你看了两篇文章了，也请你先为别人服务一下，我想你不会反对吧。

dutongUID: 141948

As a famous saying goes "children are the future of a country", children are very important to the development of society. But can we say that "how children are socialized today determines the destiny of society"? Of course not. Human society is complicated and full of unpredicted changes. Not a single factor can affect the destiny of it. Besides, even assuming that people have known what to teach their children, I think they have not find the most proper way of doing so.

First of all, human society is intricate as an ecosystem. In an ecosystem, there must be producers, consumers, decomposers, sunshine and environment, of whom no one can decide the destiny of this ecosystem exclusively. In the symbiotic system, lack of any link in the chain can destroy the totality. Similarly, the destiny of human society cannot be put on the shoulders of children. Groups of every age have their significant repercussions. Even we can say that adults are more able to determine the future of society. For example, in a war, kids do not have abilities to fight against lethal weapons or even protect themselves. It is the adult soldiers that decide kids' lives and the result of the war, which determines the destiny of countries involved in the war. In a word, the complexity of human society makes that there is not a single generation which is able to control the future completely.(我觉得你的生态系统的例子不恰当，食物链中消费者，生产者，降解者是能级的关系，而你类比的是不同的年龄；况且没有我觉得有点不恰当。可能是Argument看多了。)

Secondly, up to the present, our society has highly civilized and socialized. People do find various(variously) advantageous abilities and superior characters for children to acquire and form, (前边没有宾语)such as individuality, honesty, confidence, optimism,（and） cooperation ability. Individuality enables children think creatively and innovatively and honesty is the basic rule for living in this world. Moreover, confidence and optimism prevent them from being misleaded（mislead） by incorrect opinions and overwhelmed by difficulties and frustrations. Also, no one could survive in a competitive world by himself.(这一句没有什么根据啊。) Accordingly children should learn to cooperate with others. These abilities and characters are beneficial to them for all their lives. Besides these basic characters and abilities, some fundamental knowledge on science, arts, culture, history, and many other things are ought to be studied by children, as we all know.

Unfortunately, adults have not yet got the most effective and successful methods to raise children, （两个谓语动词之间要有连词）that is, to impart these abilities and characters to them. For example, in some developing countries, especially in Asia, heavy homework and strict exams occupy whole daily lives of students, who do not have spare time to join any sports or advantageous games practicing their leadership, coordinating（coordination） and cooperation(cooperative) ability and so on. As a result, children live(living) there miss many chances to develop their own individualities or interests which makes(make) them less(more) useful in their later lives. In USA, the situation is better, but there are still serious problems such as cohabitations, drugs, campus shooting and etc(不正规，最好不要用。而且这一整句与raise无关，多余。). Until we find a widely accepted and successful way of raising our children, we cannot settle these problems.

In sum, how children are socialized cannot decide the destiny of society alone. It is dominated by everyone（every one） of us. Children is(are) very important to our society and we should consider more about how to raise them.
第二次改别人文章，修改错误之处还请原谅。
你的文章总体感觉还好，我掐表打字的错误更多，平时写的时候就要注意一下。

kingweckUID: 144209

好多题材的issue我都不熟，本来想多写几篇才开始动手改的，免得误人子弟……
既然你都这么说了，那我也就试试看吧，kaka！

再次感谢 meloncollie 和 dutong