wglxh的小连载合辑 The Element of Style初解读 从修改中见英文功力[colo

wglxhUID: 152604

在网上盛传的经典"the elements of style",认真研读过的G友看来不多.这是真正的经典.为了节约时间,我挑几个主题节选一下.
     简单的说,主动语态更直接,简洁,有力,生动!!     
   
     少谈理论,大家看人家的例子吧!

  There were a great number of dead leaves lying on the ground. Dead leaves covered the ground.
The sound of the falls could still be heard. The sound of the falls still reached our ears.
The reason that he left college was that his health became impaired. Failing health compelled him to leave college.
It was not long before he was very sorry that he had said what he had. He soon repented his words.


    此外,即使用被动.也要时刻注意"有动词不用名词",看例子!

A survey of this region was made in 1900. This region was surveyed in 1900.
Mobilization of the army was rapidly carried out. The army was rapidly mobilized.
Confirmation of these reports cannot be obtained. These reports cannot be confirmed.

imongUID: 140258

主动语态更直接,简洁,有力,生动!!

前提得是你能找到相应的准确动词，再看看那三个例子。比较一下前后动词方面的变化，我想不用多说了吧。

给我的感觉是语态的区别并不是根本的，而能否表达出这种精确的词汇意义才是问题中心所在。

wglxhUID: 152604

呵呵,兄弟!我已经说了嘛,只是引用原文.语态具体重不重要我已经争辩过很多遍了,看来还是不足以说服你.你翻到这本书自己看吧,人家比我说的好多了.

wglxhUID: 152604

废话少说,开始例子!
   
废话类型一:傻傻的否定句!
not honest dishonest
not important trifling
did not remember forgot
did not pay any attention to ignored
did not have much confidence in distrusted

废话类型二: 不必要的修饰!
there is no doubt but that ; no doubt (doubtless)
used for fuel purposes; used for fuel
he is a man who; he
in a hasty manner ;hastily
this is a subject which; this subject
His story is a strange one. ;His story is strange.

废话类型三:最常见废词----"the fact that"
owing to the fact that since (because)
in spite of the fact that though (although)
call your attention to the fact that remind you (notify you)
I was unaware of the fact that (did not know)
the fact that he had not succeeded his failure
the fact that I had arrived my arrival

废话类型四-----累赘的插入结构
His brother, who is a member of the same firm His brother, a member of the same firm
Trafalgar, which was Nelson's last battle Trafalgar, Nelson's last battle

废话类型五-----常见的废名词,出现只为凑字数
1.character: Acts of a hostile character Hostile acts
2.system: Dayton has adopted the commission system of government. Dayton has adopted government by commission.
The dormitory system Dormitories
此外还有nature, process等,当然不是处处为废

imongUID: 140258

好！
这个完全同意！

galaxysongUID: 152834

“简洁就是美”的极佳证明。

paisleyUID: 64183

有用！谢谢！

wglxhUID: 152604

大家一起背口诀

口诀一:修饰词紧跟被修饰词

It was both a long ceremony and very tedious. ----The ceremony was both long and tedious.
All the members were not present. ---Not all the members were present.
He only found two mistakes.--- He found only two mistakes.

口诀二:谓语要跟紧主语(鉴于大家主谓人人天天不一致,这条记牢了)

Wordsworth, in the fifth book of The Excursion, gives a minute description of this church. ----In the fifth book of The Excursion, Wordsworth gives a minute description of this church.
Cast iron, when treated in a Bessemer converter, is changed into steel. -----By treatment in a Bessemer converter, cast iron is changed into steel.

口诀三:代词紧跟被指代的词( 指代不清也是俺常犯的毛病)

There was a look in his eye that boded mischief.--- In his eye was a look that boded mischief.
He wrote three articles about his adventures in Spain, which were published in Harper's Magazine.--- He published in Harper's Magazine three articles about his adventures in Spain.
This is a portrait of Benjamin Harrison, grandson of William Henry Harrison, who became President in 1889. ---This is a portrait of Benjamin Harrison, grandson of William Henry Harrison. He became President in 1889.

口诀四:切勿偷工减料,不该省的词不要省

A time not for words, but action ---A time not for words, but for action
The French, the Italians, Spanish, and Portuguese ---The French, the Italians, the Spanish, and the Portuguese
从上句中可以看出另一个大家都犯的小失误:并列一堆东西时,最后用AND收尾其前面也要有逗号!!

口诀五:把要强调的内容放在句子最后(或最开始)

Humanity has hardly advanced in fortitude since that time, though it has advanced in many other ways. ----Humanity, since that time, has advanced in many other ways, but it has hardly advanced in fortitude.
This steel is principally used for making razors, because of its hardness.--- Because of its hardness, this steel is principally used in making razors.

不过不要过于僵化,修炼的走火的说!!

wglxhUID: 152604

补充几个大家常用的废词
1.case
In many cases, the rooms were poorly ventilated. ---Many of the rooms were poorly ventilated.
It has rarely been the case that any mistake has been made.--- Few mistakes have been made.

2.factor
His superior training was the great factor in his winning the match.--- He won the match by being better trained.
Heavy artillery is becoming an increasingly important factor in deciding battles.--- Heavy artillery is playing a larger and larger part in deciding battles.

3.respective&respectively
Works of fiction are listed under the names of their respective authors. ---Works of fiction are listed under the names of their authors.
The one mile and two mile runs were won by Jones and Cummings respectively---. The one mile and two mile runs were won by Jones and by Cummings.

imongUID: 140258

我也来啰嗦一下：

主谓一致，动宾一致，指代一致，修饰一致！！！

大家写完之后自己好好查清楚喽~~~

wglxhUID: 152604

时态一致

imongUID: 140258

还有一个：单复一致。

wglxhUID: 152604

以下摘自the elements of style第五部分,最后提醒诸位G友有空多看这篇文章.实在是好的很,常看常新!

1.Claim.当动词时讲时它强调一个"申明某种权利"等.不要被所谓的范文误导.它不能替代maintain,declare,assert等词.

2.compare to &compare with:前者强调在"不同中比较相同,相似";后者强调在"相同或相似中比较不同",看例句
Thus life has been compared to a pilgrimage, to a drama, to a battle; Congress may be compared with the British Parliament.

3.due to:这个词后面一定跟的是一个具体的名词,或人.请看例子:
误用:He lost the first game, due to carelessness.(这个词不具体)
正确:This invention is due to Edison
         losses due to preventable fires

4.effect & affect:后着才可当作动词表示"影响",前者在这个意思上是名词.

5.fix:这个词在书面语中只表示"固定";表示"修理"是口语(不知道这么说是不是过时了,毕竟这是一百年前的书 ,呵呵)

6.people,persons,the public:强调重点不同,时常记得换着用.

    好了,就挑这几个,大家要记住语言有时效性,这本书不是每条都适用于现在,如果朋友们对某个词的使用有疑问的话.建议参考最权威的工具书 MARRIE WEBSTER---THE ENGLISH USAGE

    此外,我扩充了"废话"那个帖子,请回去再看一下.

treeManUID: 155261

总结得好
however,有一点点地方好像不恰当
有些地方为了语气连冠还是罗嗦一点好,比如the fact that 在I was unaware of the fact that 句式中使用还是比较恰当的。the fact that 在口语中用得也比较多，不能称为废词。引用friends中rachel对chandler说的一句话:the fact that you r jeopardizing my career never entered your mind?

wglxhUID: 152604

口语是口语,文章是文章.汉语口语中的"废话"也比比皆是.
I was unaware of the fact that 看不出来把the fact扔了有任何不妥!

最后提醒:这文章的内容针对的是英语为母语的人,所以大家不要刻意这么要求自己.我们尚处于不能表达意思阶段,表达的好与不好再说吧.贴这个帖子出来主要是想和大家分享一下好的英语.